Blessing
by Jen7118
Summary: Emily is finally happy with her life but when Hotch realizes he made a mistake will it take away Emily's happiness or will she gain something she has always wanted?
1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:** This wouldn't leave me the past few days. It's not as angsty and depressing as my other story going on so it was nice to write. Enjoy!

Disclaimer: I do not own Criminal Minds or any of its characters.

**Blessing**

Chapter One: News

**Late August 2012 (Present Time)**

The breeze blew softly through her dark curls making them whip around her face. The summer day welcomed her mood as Emily walked out of the doctor's office. The morning sun was shining and the air smelt of fresh flowers from the floral shop she walked past. It wrapped her in warmth as the brunette agent made it to her car. Her heart was also wrapped in warmth like her pale skin from the news she just received. The smile on her face had been a permanent fixture for a few hours now. The small giggle that left her lips as she climbed into her seat and buckled her seatbelt led to more. After holding it all in while in the presence of others she finally let herself let go. She laughed in delight and clasped her hand over her mouth in slight disbelief.

It was really happening. After waiting so long it was happening. Her knees bounced on their own accord and a few happy tears slipped from her eyes. She mentally did a fist pump and squealed in sheer happiness. Emily never thought this day would come. And from the past two years of her life it didn't seem likely.

Having Ian Doyle come after her family and basically exile her from her own life and home didn't make this day feel like it would ever come. She left the only place she called home for a place where she didn't know a soul and that was the point. Her name was changed so many times she never knew who she was. It was a wonder when she came back after seven long tortuous months that she even knew her real name.

Walking around always looking over your shoulder in fear of the monster from your past was coming for you was no way to live. So she didn't. She didn't live, she existed. She stayed close to her apartment and didn't go out much. Having friends wasn't even an option. She ended up talking to herself most of the time. By the end she was afraid she might be going insane.

Then when she did make it home it took months to finally come to terms with the pervious events. Months of required therapy helped some but her team and family helped most. Each in their own way made her feel like she did deserve this family. She never would be able to thank them for that but she tried to everyday.

She indulged Morgan in his recertification for the both of them and quickly volunteered to help him with training new recruits. Dave was easier, just going to his newest book signing brought him around. Emily made sure to take the girls out for drinks and endless shopping even though she was in Paris for seven months, the shopping capital of the world. Garcia was appreciative for the time and JJ loved getting away from the office.

The one she worried about most was Reid. He was more upset about the secret of her 'death'. She understood he was hurt but eventually she couldn't take it anymore so she invited him over for a showing of his favorite documentary and he came around too.

Hotch was another story completely. After a few months back she made good on her promise to come to him if she was having a 'bad day'. She didn't have them often but when she did he always talked her through them. It was nice finally having someone to lean on. He became her pillar of strength on those bad days and she overcame them. But being close for a few weeks led to more than she ever thought.

The first time he kissed her she literally felt like she was flying. His taste and scent consumed her every time since. The dark haired man became a drug to her. She craved him like nothing she ever had before. His touch sent chills down her skin and his voice could melt her heart.

As with any addiction she eventually had to sober up. The withdrawal was almost unbearable but with time and major retail therapy with the girls she found herself happy again. She wasn't cured, she would always have him in her heart but she was able to move on. There were many reasons why they didn't work but for the sake of argument they wanted different things. And one of those things was the reason she walked into work with a goofy grin on her face.

After setting down her bag and briefcase she went about her morning routine chatting with the boys about their weekend and getting the daily gossip from the exuberant technical analyst. She never once told them about the news that made her heart race but she would. First she needed to tell him. Not because she had to but for his own sake she wanted to. The news wouldn't impact his life the way it would hers but she owed it to him to tell him first.

She grabbed a water bottle from the kitchenette and strolled back to her desk. She glanced up to his office and noticed his door open. Taking that as an invitation she took some of her files and walked up the stairs to the office. Subconsciously she placed her free hand over her flat stomach and whispered to herself that all was going to be okay.

Emily walked in cautiously and stood at the doorway. "Sorry to disturb you but do you have a minute?"

Hotch looked up from his paperwork saw Emily. Or Prentiss rather. He wasn't allowed to call her by her first name anymore. "Of course" he closed his file and leaned back in his chair.

She smiled awkwardly as she sat across from the large wooden desk. His office oozed masculinity in every corner. The desk was oversized and smack dab in the middle of the room along with a black leather chair he sat in. They told of his dominance. The wood work was all dark which made the room seem smaller with the dark paint and cabinets lined against the wall. Flowers were nowhere in sight and only a few photo frames occupied his desk.

The room screamed SSA Unit Chief Aaron Hotchner.

"Is everything okay?" he asked curiously as she diverted her eyes from his gaze and the smile faded from her lips.

She took a reassuring breath and spit it out. "I'm pregnant."

The world around them seemed to stop. Their eyes locked and held. His heart pumped in a new rhythm and his eye brows furrowed in confusion. It had been months since they were together and she was on the pill at the time. Hotch felt his life spinning.

As the silence became threatening Emily turned her gaze to her lap where her fingers picked at the fingernails of her left hand. It was a nervous tick she had tried to get under control but it seems to not be working.

Hotch cleared his thick throat getting Emily's attention. "I-um… I will support you with whatever you choose to do." He stuttered out as best he could. All he could think about was telling his girlfriend of two months that he knocked up his co-worker.

"Thanks but I think you have the wrong impression. It's not yours." She said softly. She should have known he would think that but she honestly didn't think to say that first. He was now dating someone else and it had been months since they broke up. Although Emily still loved him and in a way she always would she would never hide a pregnancy from him for several months if the baby was his.

A sigh of relief came through his lips and his heart rate slowed. It was beating so fast he would probably have had a heart attack. An unintentional smile graced his face but soon disappeared at the frown on the woman's face. Guilt quickly replaced the relief and he was quick to apologise.

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to look happy about that but you know how I feel about more kids." He reminded her.

She just nodded and bit her tongue to stop her mouth from giving him the reply she wanted to. Looking away to get her emotions under control she tried hard to disguise her face from the hurt she felt at his confession of happiness.

She did understand he didn't want more children but that being his reaction made her feel if this was his child he would turn her away. How could a man look at his child as a regret? But still she didn't voice it.

"Whose baby is it then?" he asked. He knew she wasn't seeing anyone at the time and it worried him slightly.

"He or she is my baby. I was artificially inseminated with a donor." She answered confidently. Raising a child on her own was going to be hard she knew but with all the work came the best reward possible. She would have a family of her own. She would become a mother which was something she always wanted.

"That's… great Emily." He nodded. He knew this was something she wanted. When they were together that was one of the biggest things they differed on. He had a son and that's all he wanted. Emily on the other hand craved to have a child of her own. The difference finally became the last straw, so to speak, and they split.

"Thanks. I wanted to let you know before I told the team." She smiled weakly.

"Thank you. I appreciate that. Just to warn you because I know you will fight it you will be taken off field duty at 6 months. How far are you now?"

Emily rolled her eyes and huffed. "I know and I will try not to fight it but I can't promise anything. I'm eight weeks." Her hand went to rest on her stomach again. It was more out of comfort and reassurance than anything else.

"When do you want to tell the team?"

"Soon" she smiled. Even though he hurt her by his reaction she was still thrilled with her news.

**March 2012 (Flashback)**

Emily was nervous as she stepped out of her car and onto the warm cement of the local park's parking lot. Hotch had finally asked her to meet his son Jack. She had met him in passing a few times over the years she worked with his father but this was the first official 'Hi I'm your dad's girlfriend' meeting.

She loved kids and was surprisingly good with them considering her experience with them which wasn't all that much. Having a mother like the Ambassador didn't help her in that field either, her mother was always too busy to have quality with her so Emily never had the parent child bonding. In a way she knew how she didn't want to act with children but on the other hand she wasn't sure how to speak to them. Talking with child victims was different. She already had something to talk about. She had a goal to work towards but with Jack she wasn't sure what he would feel comfortable talking to her about.

After voicing her concerns with Hotch, her boyfriend of a month and a half, they decided it would be better for her to meet them at the park so Jack could play if it was uncomfortable. But she was hoping it wouldn't be.

Spotting Hotch's waving hand she smile softly and walked to him. "Hey" she said standing a few feet from the man and his 6 year old son.

"Hi, Jack this is Emily, Daddy's girlfriend." Hotch knelt by the boy giving him a reassuring smile and a small nudge to get him to greet her.

"Hello, can I go play now?" he turned to his father his dark eyes pleading for his freedom.

Hotch chuckled and agreed but reminded the boy their picnic lunch would be ready soon. Jack ran off as fast as possible giving Emily some relief. Apparently he had no major reaction to her and all he wanted was to play. She couldn't fault him for that. There were many children his age playing on the giant slide which he went to first.

Lunch was soon setup on the nearby lawn. The spring day was perfect for a picnic; fresh flowers bloomed next to the tree they took shade from and the sky was clear from any clouds. Emily sat next to Hotch her hand in his as he closely watched over his son. He was very protective even from Emily. He waited and waited to tell Jack he was dating and even then he didn't tell the boy about her. Jack had been through so much in his few years that she understood when Hotch told her he didn't want to bring her in straight away.

"I'm hungry!" Jack said with a smile as he ran up to the agents. His face was slightly sweaty from all the running he did and he definitely smelt like a boy Emily thought.

"Let's eat then. Wipe your hands please." Hotch handed Jack a hand wipe. "Would you like peanut butter and jelly or turkey?"

"Peanut butter and jelly please." Jack smiled taking his sandwich and crawling into his father's lap.

Emily moved to sit across from the pair. "Did you have fun Jack?" she asked. She nervously bit her lip waiting for his response.

"Yep. Did you see me go down that big slide? It's so big right dad?" he pointed excitedly.

"It is very big buddy. Can you sit beside me so I can eat?" he moved the boy then grabbed his preferred sandwich and offered Emily the same.

"Thanks." She smiled then turned to Jack. "I did see you. You went down really fast." She opened the baggy and took out her sandwich then smiled at Hotch for remembering she liked ham not turkey.

"Yeah, do you like going down slides too?" his eye brow rose questioningly.

"I guess. I haven't been on one in a long time but I like rollercoaster's. They go fast too."

"Dad took me to the park that has those but I was too small to ride them." he said sadly taking a bite from his food then wiping his face with his shirt. Hotch quickly handed him a napkin and frowned down at him.

"Amusement park, buddy." Hotch corrected. "Maybe we can go back now that you're bigger."

"Can we? Do you want to come to Emily?" Jack asked moving closer to her and setting down his food. The smile on his face made his eyes brighten and small dimples that reminded her of Hotch poked out from his chubby cheeks.

She smile inwardly that he was warming up to her and by the look on Hotch's face he was pleased. "I would love to." She was thrilled that she was asking the right questions and getting him to open up to her. She figured he might say a few words but by the way he keeps moving towards her she knew she was in the good.

Jack nodded happily and then took on a serious expression. He put down his sandwich and caught Emily's gaze. "Do you work with my dad to get the bad guys?"

Emily looked to Hotch first and when he nodded she smiled "I do. Your daddy is my boss." They had just recently told the team. Most of them were happy and accepted it fast but a few were still coming around.

Morgan being one who wasn't so happy about the idea had made his opinion heard. He felt Emily was like his sister so he was just protecting her. Hotch carefully reassured him that all his intentions were good.

"You won't get hurt like my mommy right?" Jack asked smiling weakly.

Hotch nearly choked on his water as he wrapped a hand around his son's arm. "Jack!"

Emily put her hand up to stop him and smiled down at the boy. He was just worried. She took his hand in hers and squeezed gently. "No honey, I'm not going to get hurt like your mommy."

Hotch's hand let go of his son and he stared at the woman in front of him. Half of him was a little mad she even answered the question. How could she know she wouldn't get hurt? It was unfair to promise Jack she wouldn't if she didn't know if she would. He thought back to the Doyle debacle, she was hurt then.

The other half of him was happy she took in Jack's question like a pro. She would make an incredible mother. She was gentle and kind and most of all loving. He knew that's why she does so well with child victims. She could get them to open up and feel safe all at the same time.

**Present Day (Late August 2012)**

Hotch thought back on that day as Emily left his office and smiled at the thought of Emily being that way with her own child. A picture of her at the park with a dark haired little girl swam through his mind. She would make a great mother but why is his gut telling him this is all wrong?

**A/N:** I know another baby fic but hey it's different then most out there. Hotch is not the father and they were in a relationship previously. Make sure to pay attention to the time line in each chapter. Some are flashbacks. Leave me your thoughts please!


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

Chapter Two: Telling the Team

**Late August 2012 (Present Time)**

Waking up to an annoying buzzing sound Emily blindly reached for the disturbing device and after several tries she managed to turn the alarm clock off. Groaning loudly she flung the covers back over her head. Safe in the cloak of darkness she opened her eyes slowly. She knew she needed to get up but she couldn't bring herself to move from the warmth of her bed.

After several mental pep talks she managed to sit up right but that led to other issues. Running to the bathroom as her stomach rolled she made it just in time to empty the contents of her stomach into the cold porcelain of the toilet bowl. Emily slid down the wall when she finished and tried to gulp as much air as possible. Her hand lazily rubbed over her clothed stomach. "That's going to be fun." she sighed. "Don't think I won't pay you back for that. I can be that embarrassing parent when you're in high school."

Finding her bearings she rose from the floor and went to the sink to brush her teeth. Looking in the mirror she couldn't help the smile creeping onto her face. Even if she had to endure morning sickness she was still so excited and in complete awe that this was happening. She had a growing baby inside her. The emotions she had from that was something she just couldn't explain.

Emily's morning routine went without anymore hitches. Well except for her morning 2 cups of coffee before work. She pouted at the sight of the magnificent machine sitting on her counter top. "I guess you can go in a cupboard for nine months." She said unplugging the coffee machine.

She decided early on when she went for the artificial insemination consults that if she got pregnant she would change her eating habits along with whatever the doctor told her to do. Which was going to be a challenge, Emily was more of a pizza and beer kind of girl and especially with her job, fast food was her best friend. Dave might just have to give more cooking classes so she could learn how to boil water and not burn it.

Making it to the office Emily walked through the glass doors of the BAU with excitement pumping through her. After her talk with Hotch she decided to tell the team sooner rather than later. She knew she would have to tell them all at once too. If she told the girls first Garcia wouldn't be able to hold in her excitement and if she told the guys first Morgan would be mister protective and she wouldnt get anything done. Hotch had agreed to let her take the floor at the mornings briefing before they took off on another case. She figured it would be some happy news to their normal grim work.

"Morning" she greeted both Morgan and Garcia who were chatting over coffee which made Emily's mouth water. Patting her tummy she reminded herself this was for a very good cause.

Moaning at the pile of paperwork on her desk which was not there the night before she looked up to see Reid smiling coyly at her. "Whose is this?" she asked pointedly. She knew all the files couldn't be hers when Morgan's desk was nearly empty.

"I have no clue as to what you are talking about." Reid stated trying hard to hide his lying eyes.

"Sure you don't. I don't want to be part of your ongoing shenanigans." she took half the pile and slapped them down on Morgan's desk. Then she went about organizing her desk.

She hated having an unorganized desk. She had even been accused of fixing up JJ's disastrous desk once. Never admitting she was the one who really did it she safely accused Dave instead.

Opening her top drawer to put some papers away she found an old picture of her and Hotch. It was not long after they started dating and they were at her apartment being lazy. She smiled sadly at it. She was so in love with him she couldn't see straight sometimes.

She still had a hard time believing he even asked her out. The poor guy was so nervous when he did it she had to hold in her laughter.

**February 2012 (Flashback)**

Emily walked into the elevator in her apartment building and pressed the number 3 to her floor. Hotch followed in after her with a small smile on his face. After a case from hell he kindly drove her home and for some reason had to walk her up. It was hard enough that he saw her cry for the first time in six years but she didn't need him walking her up to her apartment like some kind of kid. She was a grown woman even if she cried like a baby in front of him.

As the doors opened and Emily stepped through Hotch put his hand on her lower back. The touch alone sent chills down her spine and made her stomach do a weird flip. All her rude thoughts disappeared as her knees went weak. For the past few weeks he made a point almost every day to somehow keep touching her, whether it was bold like grabbing her arm or something simple like slightly bumping into her when he passes by on the jet. It was all making her have crazy thoughts though.

"Thanks for walking me up." She turned to him after opening her door.

"No problem." He bit his lip nervously. _It's now or never Hotchner!_ He told himself.

"Well goodnight."

"Wait. Um- I…" he stopped. He didn't know how to do this. It's been years since Haley and he wasn't sure how to ask a woman out anymore. He was young when he started dating Haley so it was the cool line of 'Wanna hang out sometime?' He didn't know how to do it now.

"What's wrong?" Emily asked but by the look on his face she knew the answer. She tried not to chuckle as he closed his eyes probably from embarrassment she thought. "Hotch, you can tell me anything. Hell I just bared my soul to you." which was true. Ever since the day she promised him she would tell him if she had a bad day she has been talking to him about everything that happened with Doyle. Emily even talked to him about when she was undercover with the man.

It wasn't easy to open up to anyone but Hotch was different. He has been through some of the same things. Foyet was after his family just like Doyle went after hers. They both fought their monsters in different ways but at the end of the day they both beat them.

"I know but…damn I don't know how to do this." He took a breath and rushed it out. "Would you like to go to dinner with me on Friday?"

Emily smiled at his wavering face. "Yes, I would love to. See wasn't that hard." She joked.

"I guess not." He smiled brightly.

Emily took in the way his eyes brightened and his dimples peaked out just slightly. A chill ran up and down her body when he stepped closer and took her hand in his and his dark eyes grew darker. Then her breath caught.

"I'll see you tomorrow." He kissed her cheek, happy that his confidence was back.

"Sure" she breathed as he walked down the hall to the elevator. After one last wave she went into her apartment and closed the door. Letting the last few minutes sick in she leaned against the door. "See you tomorrow." She sighed.

**Late August 2012 (Present Time)**

"Briefing room please!" JJ walked by Emily's desk making the older woman jump in surprise. "Sorry" JJ smiled an apology.

Emily smiled back shoving the picture back in her desk and gathered her things to follow the blonde up to the briefing. Taking her usual seat her eyes met Hotch's dark orbs. She smiled weakly and he nodded briefly back.

All night she thought about his reaction and it ended up just pissing her off more. She knew his stand on kids but this man who told her she was the love of his life in the same breath didn't want to father her children. Getting her mind to wrap around that was going to be a nightmare.

"Garcia before we start Prentiss needs to tell us something." Hotch said cutting the blonde technical analyst off when she stood to go over the case.

Garcia's head snapped to Emily with concern written all over her face. "Are you okay Sweetie?"

Emily smiled softly "Yeah, I'm fine."

She waited until everyone took their seats then she stood up. "I'm not going anywhere so everyone stop looking at me like I'm about to kill your dogs." She joked making everyone chuckle.

"So what is it Princess?" Morgan asked looking up from his file.

Taking a deep breath she smiled "I'm pregnant."

Cheers and laughter came tumbling out of everyone. Garcia raced to the brunette and wrapped her in a hug then let go and patted Emily's stomach. Emily gave her a look and Garcia immediately stopped and moved back mumbling an apology.

"Who's the papa?" Dave asked eyeing Hotch closely.

"A guy I pick out of a catalog." Emily joked but it was true.

"Really?" JJ asked.

"Kind of. I was artificially inseminated with donor sperm."

The room was silent for a moment then Reid broke through spouting the statistics of single women raising children. That seemed to ease everyone somewhat.

"You're going to do this alone?" Morgan asked.

Emily shook her head. "Not alone. I have you guys. I know it sounds crazy but I want to be a mother. And if I wait much longer…"

"Your child bearing years are coming to a close and even at your age right now it's…" Reid stopped as Morgan slapped at the back of his head. "What?"

"Kid you don't know when to stop. You never talk about a woman's age." The dark man whispered.

"Oh, sorry Emily. I'm sure you're going to be just fine." The boy genius smiled awkwardly.

"Thanks I think." Emily turned back to the table.

"Okay let's get back to work. Garcia?" Hotch got everyone to settle down and get focused again.

"Yes sir. No one is going to like this but two weeks ago 8 year old Tammy Keller was with her family at the local YMCA in Dallas Texas. During one of the routine timeouts, when all the swimmers have to get out, she was found at the bottom of the pool. Drowned obviously. At first they thought it was an accident but two days later at the same YMCA 10 year old Candice Adams was also found at the bottom of the pool. And now the toll is up to four. Jessica Tobin and Abby Martin 9 and 10 died this week but at a different pool. They were at an amusement park call NRH2O."

"No witnesses?"

"No it's summer so the pools are packed and there is registration for the YMCA but you don't have to sign in if you are a member so we don't know who was there." She replied.

"There was bruising around their necks in a hand shape like they were forced under that's why they called us." Hotch informed.

"An estimated 5,000 children ages 14 and under are hospitalized due to unintentional drowning-related incidents each year and 15 percent of those die in the hospital and as many as 20 percent suffer severe, permanent neurological disability." Reid spouted mainly to himself.

"Wheels up in 30. I want to hit the ground running on this." Hotch said walking out.

Emily gathered her files and was about to head out when JJ grabbed her arm.

"Hey, congratulations. I'm so happy for you. How far along are you?" the blonde hugged the older woman.

"Eight weeks." She answered then was engulfed by Morgan.

"I can be your baby daddy." He smirked.

She laughed as did the rest in the room. "Thanks but I don't think so."

"And why not? I would make a great dad!" he pouted.

"I'm sure you would but I don't need a baby daddy." She grinned walking out followed closely by Garcia.

"Sugar plum, I'm so happy for you and I promise to spoil Mini Prentiss just like Henry."

"Thanks. I know you will." Emily squeezed her hand and followed the group of out the BAU doors.

Hotch trailed the group quietly listening to all their congratulations for the baby and all he wanted to do was tell her this was wrong. He just knew it was.

A/N: Thanks for the reviews. Keep'em coming.


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N:** Thank you so much for the reviews! You will be finding out more about their past relationship with the flashbacks.

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

Chapter Three: Moving on

**Late August 2012 (Present Time)**

Emily threw her go bag down as she turned to lock her apartment door behind her. She was glad to be home. Six days of looking at young girl's bodies emotionally drained her more than she let on. It was easy to cover her emotions but this case was worse. Even though they see cases like this often she would never get use to them.

Seeing the parent's faces made her stomach turn and in those moments she wanted to walk out the doors and not come back. It made her sick that these awful things could happen to young kids.

After they finally caught the Unsub Emily couldn't wait to get out of there and now that she was home all she wanted to do was crawl up on the couch and sleep. Luckily everyone else felt the same way so it wasn't hard to get away.

Passing through the kitchen she grabbed a water bottle and proceeded to the living room. "Sergio? Where are you pretty kitty?" she called out as she checked on his food and water bowls. Seeing both full she walked into the living room and saw her black cat curled up on the couch.

"Hey Sergio, why didn't you answer me?" she picked him up and grabbed a blue toy car that he was laying on.

"What have you got? This must be Jack's." She mused mostly to herself. The last time he was over he was playing with them.

**Late April 2012 (Flashback)**

"Jack the noodles are done. Wanna help me?" Emily asked the boy who was lying on the floor playing with his race cars as Sergio snoozed next to him.

"Yeah!" he jumped up and followed her to the kitchen.

"Okay buddy, grab the stool and climb on up." She told him walking to the stove picking up the drainer.

"I'm ready Emily." Jack said proudly standing on his stool at the sink.

Emily smiled down at him. "Here it comes, sweetie." she poured the macaroni noodles into the drainer and pulled the pot back. "Shake 'em good Jack."

Hotch walked in as Emily wrapped her arms around the boy and helped him drain the noodles. He smiled as they jokes and laughed. He could get use to this, he thought.

Emily felt his eyes on her but chose to focus on Jack. She helped him down and poured the noodles back in the pan and brought it down so Jack could add the cheese. Giving him the spoon to stir she finally made eye contact with Hotch. "Hey"

"Hey, how are you doing buddy?" he smiled at her then to his son.

"Look daddy, we made mac n cheese for dinner." Jack puffed out his chest proudly.

"I see that. Great job, can you go wash up real fast?"

Jack nodded and ran out. "What's up?" Emily asked.

"Nothing how was he?" he asked wrapping her up in his arms. Emily volunteered to babysit while Hotch had a late meeting with the Director.

"He was great as usual. We colored and played a few games. We are wild people ya know?" she joked as he kissed her cheek then her down her neck. Humming in approval as her hands moved up his chest she slowly pushed him away. "Jack" she reminded.

Chuckling he kissed her softly and backed away. "Yes ma'am"

"What?" she asked as he eyed her oddly.

Shaking his head he smiled. "I just can get use to this, coming home to you and Jack."

"Me too." she smiled back. Her heart fluttered slightly. She knew for the first time in her life she felt at home when she was with him. Both Jack and Hotch made her feel loved and wanted. That was a first.

"I know it's still kind of early, only three months in but what do you think about moving in with us?" he asked.

"Really?" she blushed slightly not meaning for her voice to sound so dreamy.

"Yeah, I want to wake up to you in my arms every morning. Jack obviously loves you and I hate being away from you. Move in with me." He pulled her to him.

"Okay" she nodded just before kissing him.

"Gross, Stop that! Can we eat now?" Jack pushed past them and climbed back on his stool.

Breaking apart with a laugh Hotch kissed her forehead went to his son. Emily turned to watch them. She smiled softly as the feeling of home washed over her again.

**Late August 2012 (Present Time)**

That feeling left her not long after that night. Moving in together meant two very different things to both of them. She should have never let her guard down with him but she did. She wouldn't make that mistake again.

Glancing at the clock she groaned softly. "Bed time Serg" she put him down and walked around making sure all the windows and doors were locked. Shutting out the lights she made her way to the bedroom and gathered her pajamas and put them on.

Climbing in bed she grabbed her cell phone and noticed a new text message.

_Call me when you get home.-Hotch_

"Ha" she spat out sarcastically deleting the message. She didn't owe him anything. Why should she call him? They were off for the weekend so she knew for a fact it wasn't a work call. Placing her phone on the night stand she pulled the covers over herself and closed her eyes.

Even though her mind told her not to think about him she did. Her heart ached for him. Hotch hurt her so much but she still loved him, she didn't trust him with her heart but she did love him.

As she fell into slumber her last thoughts were of him holding her.

-CM-CM-

Hotch waited as long as possible. He couldn't anymore. She always responded to his messages no matter what. But now it had been hours. He had to go. Racing to her apartment his mind filled with all the awful things that could have happened to her. His heart was pounding in his chest so hard he thought it just might beat right out.

Skidding to a stop and climbing out of the car he ran through the building and up the stairs to the third floor. Coming to a stop outside her door he knocked loudly. "Come on Em." He knocked again. "Open up!"

He could hear movement from inside and he finally took a breath.

The door opened slowly as Emily blinked up at him, her eyes still adjusting to the light. "Hotch, what are you doing here?"

Pushing his way inside he huffed. "Don't like answering your phone now?" he turned back to glare at her.

"Hotch I'm not doing this with you. I was sleeping so please leave." She said calmly keeping the door open as he paced in the hallway.

"I'm not leaving. Why didn't you call? I thought…"

"No! You don't have a right to think about me in anyway. You chose that. Just because I'm pregnant doesn't give you a right to handle me. I can do that all by myself!" she pointed an accusing finger at him.

"I'm not trying to handle you." He rolled his eyes something he learned from her.

"You did and you are. At work I get it. You want to make sure I can do my job which I proved. So you have no bearing in my personal life." She didn't want to say that but she needed to. She couldn't keep herself hanging on to him. She had to let go. "Hotch, you have a girlfriend. What do you want from me? I can't do this to myself." She confessed in a whisper.

Hotch watched as her eyes pooled with tears and her voice cracked with emotion. He pushed too far. The breakup was hard on both of them but now he did have a girlfriend and Emily was moving on with a baby on the way. He needed to understand that and move on as well. Looking away to gather his own thoughts he nodded slowly. "I know. I'm sorry Emily." He turned back to her. "I'll try to stay away."

"You don't have to stay away just know I don't need a protector. I wouldn't have done this if I couldn't handle it." She said rubbing at her flat stomach.

He nodded again and headed for the door. "Goodnight"

"Oh hey wait; this is Jack's I think. And next weekend JJ and I are taking Henry to the zoo. Can Jack come with us? I promise not to give him too much sugar." She grabbed the toy car off the table and handed it to him.

"Sounds good. He misses you." He smiled. Jack asks about her often.

"I miss him too." Even though she and Hotch were over didn't mean she didn't love Jack any less. The two of them grew very close over the months and she didn't want to just leave the boy.

"Goodnight Emily." He walked out the door.

"Night Hotch" she closed the door literally and emotionally. She could finally move forward.


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N:** Thank you for all the nice comments and reviews. They are wonderful to read!

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

Chapter Four: Jack

**Early September 2012 (Present Time)**

Emily waved back at JJ who was waiting for the brunette and Jack at the entrance of the Zoo. "Hey JJ. Hi Henry." She smiled down at the young blonde boy.

"Jack, Henry was so excited you were coming." JJ hugged Jack then looked back at Emily. "You ready?"

"Of course, right Jack?"

Jack nodded. "Henry do you wanna see the hippos?" Jack asked taking Henry's hand.

"Yeah, hippos Mama!" Henry exclaimed.

Emily took Jack's other hand and led the group into the Zoo. The first stop was to the gorillas which the boys jumped up on the benches and pressed their little faces to the glass.

"So how was it picking him up?" JJ asked quietly so the listening ears wouldn't hear.

"It was weird and Hotch tries to act normal but he doesn't quite pull it off. He ended up yelling at Jack for jumping on me. He doesn't ever yell at him." Emily sighed.

"He is just trying to wrap his mind around you being a mommy soon. I don't know all that happened between you but he was hurt too. He did love you Em." JJ turned to her.

"I know he did. That wasn't the issue but let's just say it's what he chose. I didn't choose to leave him. I still love him but I'm trying to put my life together and live it for me." Emily said taking Jack's hand again as they moved to the next exhibit.

"I'm not saying you shouldn't. I'm so happy for you and I want you to have everything you want. I'm just saying he's trying the same. Give him a little slack." JJ said putting her hand on Emily's arm to convey she meant no harm by her remarks. The boys were entertained by the lemurs jumping around their enclosure.

Emily took in her words and smiled weakly. Maybe she was being hard on Hotch but she had to. If she gave in just a little she would end up in a bad place, a place where she didn't move on. He surely had.

Beth. It had only taken him a month to move on to the other woman. That alone made Emily furious. For him to move on so quickly with the marathon running hussy was too much for her to handle if she gave him some leeway.

So her walls had to stay up and her heart had to be protected. And if not her own sake for her baby's, she would not let her mess relationship with Hotch affect her baby's life.

After seeing the elephants and the tigers the boys were ready for lunch. Emily was ready too. Breakfast wasn't so good when you spend the morning in the restroom tossing your cookies. Making it to the outside café area Emily volunteered to find a table with Jack while JJ got Henry and herself some food.

"Over there Emily" Jack said pointing to an empty table.

"Good find sweetie. Come on." She smiled at him.

Getting settled at the table Jack climbing into her lap and laid his head back on her shoulder. "Tired buddy?" Jack nodded. "Me too. I think we only have a few more exhibits left but you are doing a great job helping Henry."

"He's nice. Daddy said I'm the big boy so I have to help him." Jack told her.

"You are the big boy." She said playing with his hair. "I miss you sweetie."

"I miss you to Emily. When are you coming home?" he looked up at her with his big doe eyes that just made her want to give him anything he wanted.

"Oh honey. I am home but remember when I told you I have to live in a different home?"

"Yeah but I don't want you to. I want you to live with me." He wrapped his arms around her neck. "Please come home Emily."

**May 2012 (Flashback)**

Emily looked up in anger at Hotch. She wanted to scream and stomp but she didn't. The little boy in the next room could hear every word and she was not going to let him hear what she really wanted to say to his father. Taking a breath she whispered harshly "I want to talk to Jack then I'll leave." Without waiting for an answer she stormed around the corner and knocked on Jack's door.

Waiting for his sweet "come in" she tried to calm herself as much as possible and wiped her tear stained face. She slowly opened the door and smiled weakly down at the boy. "Hey sweetie. Can I talk to you?"

Jack put down his cars and moved to his bed. "Sure"

"Jack, I know you heard me and your dad and I wanted to tell you I'm sorry. Yelling isn't the answer and we shouldn't have done that." She sat next to him.

"It's okay." He frowned.

"It's not and I'm sorry. But honey I think it's best if I go stay at Aunt Penelope's tonight."

"But why? Daddy is sorry too. You can't leave!" he grabbed her hand and held it tight.

"I don't want to but your daddy and I aren't going to see each other anymore so I need to move out. I know you don't understand this but I want you to know I love you very much and even though daddy and I aren't together doesn't mean I don't want to see you. I promise I will come get you and we can go for ice cream and we can play at the park. I promise baby I will always be here for you." She hugged him tight and kissed his head. Both of them in tears and both not wanting to let go Emily pulled back and turned to see Hotch standing the door way.

"Jack?" he said walking in.

"Go away! I hate you!" Jack cried crawling up the bed and stuffing his face into his pillow. "You made Emily leave!"

Emily turned to Hotch with tears streaming down her face. "I'm sorry" she whispered.

Hotch nodded and went to his son's side. "Buddy I know you're upset but it's going to be okay."

Emily watched as Hotch tried to console his son but soon it was too much to watch so she quickly gathered some of her things and left.

**Early September 2012 (Present Time)**

Emily hugged Jack again and kissed his head. "I wish it was that easy."

"Is it because you have a baby in your stomach?" Jack asked.

"Not really sweetie. You know your dad and I aren't together and he is now dating Beth." She smiled.

"It's not fair." He whined.

"I know" she ruffled his hair and looked up to see JJ and Henry on their way over to the table. "Let's go get some lunch Jack."

-CM-CM-

As Emily pulled her car into Hotch's apartment complex she could feel the day wearing on her. After lunch the boys seem to get their energy back so they finished the exhibits and then went for pizza at the arcade. Emily was exhausted but she was also very happy to have had the day with Jack.

"Home buddy. Let's go see daddy." She said getting out and helping Jack get out as well. They walked to the apartment and Emily knocked while Jack leaned on her. He was also very exhausted.

"Hello" A brunette woman answered the door.

_Beth _Emily inwardly growled. "Hey, is Hotch home? I was just dropping Jack off."

"Oh yes you must be Emily. Hi Jack. Come on in. Aaron is just on the phone." She moved back so the two could enter.

"I don't want to interrupt." Emily said dropping to her knees to hug Jack. "I love you buddy. Thanks for coming today."

"Cant I stay with you tonight?" he looked at her with his sad eyes again. Her heart sank to her stomach.

"I'm sorry sweetie. You need to stay with daddy." She really wanted to say yes but with Hotch not in the room she couldn't make that promise to him.

"Please? I don't want you to go." Jack let a few tears flow.

"Hey buddy!" Hotch walked in. "What wrong?" he asked turning Jack to him.

Emily got up and frowned at the boy. "Jack its okay. I promise I will see you soon. Remember if you get all the answers right on you're spelling test on Friday we'll go get ice cream on Saturday." She had promised him that in the car when he told her about the test.

"Actually we are going to my parent's house this weekend." Beth piped up.

Emily looked up at her then at Hotch who was just looking down at Jack. "Oh well we'll make it when you come back."

"I don't want to go. I want to stay with Emily!" Jack cried out.

"Jack! We do not yell. Talk nicely." Hotch scolded.

"I'm going to go. I love you Jack." Emily said trying to leave before they could see her tears.

"Can't I stay with Emily and you can go to her parent's daddy? I've been really good! Please?" Jack wrapped his arms around Emily's waist and looked up to his father.

"That's up to Emily." Hotch looked to her "I'm okay with it if you are?"

"Aaron, I thought he was meeting my parents?" Beth asked moving to stand next to him.

"If he doesn't want to then I'm not going to force him." he said to her.

"I would love to have him for the weekend." Emily smiled. Jack smiled brightly and hugged her tighter.

"I'll let you know the plans and you can stay here with him if you want."

"If it's okay I would like to have him at my place." Emily countered. It wasn't that she was trying to be difficult but stay in the apartment where she once lived with them would be unbearable.

"I understand." He said softly.

"Okay Jack, I'm going to go. See you later sweetie and do good on your test." She kissed his head and left.

"Hey Em" Hotch walked behind her out of the apartment. She turned to look at him. "Thanks. He really misses you."

"It's not a problem. I miss him too." _and I miss you!_ She smiled and left.


	5. Chapter 5

**A/N:** Thank you for the reviews.

Disclaimer: I own nothing and Reid's statistics came from Wikipedia.

Chapter Five: Heart

**Early September 2012 (Present Time)**

"Thanks for coming with me Garcia." Emily smiled at the woman next to her at her doctor's office.

"Oh honey, I honestly wouldn't let anyone else come. Reid would just scare you and JJ already went through all this so she knows it all and Dave couldn't make it. That left me and Derek. Who would you rather? Me of course!" She giggled. "Plus this is your first real doctor's appointment so it's special."

"I did have an appointment when I found out. They did all the normal things then. This is more like a check up."Emily said nervously bouncing her knees in the waiting room.

Garcia watched her with a bright smile. "Em, calm down. It's going to be fine." She took the brunette's hand in hers with a gentle squeeze.

"Emily Prentiss" the nurse called out.

Emily stood up taking a calming breath and walked to the nurse with Garcia following after her. They were taken to a small exam room where Emily was told to sit on the table and Garcia pulled up a chair next to her.

"Alright Ms. Prentiss, Dr. Roberts will be here in a few minutes." The nurse smile and left the room.

"Emily, stop being so nervous, it's going to be fine. Plus we get to see our little Prentiss." Garcia practically squealed.

Emily rolled her eyes and chuckled. "I know it's just nerve racking."

"Don't think about it. So when do you think you will find out if it's a boy or girl?" she asked trying to distract the brunette.

"Not for a little while longer."

The blonde huffed. "Which do you want?"

"Doesn't matter. I know everyone says it but as long as the baby is healthy I'm good." she rubbed at her nonexistent baby bump. She hadn't started showing by any means yet but she could tell the pants were starting to sit funny on her hips and getting a little tight.

"Well, I think the poll is saying girl."

Emily rolled her eyes again. Everyone on the team made predictions about the baby's sex even though Emily told them it was still a while till she would find out. That is if she wanted to know. She wasn't quite sure she did. The surprise would be nice but then she wanted to know so she could get the nursery setup.

"Hey Emily, how are you doing?" The blond haired doctor came in.

"I'm okay."

"No she's not. She's a nervous wreck." Garcia smiled beside her.

Dr. Roberts laughed softly. "That's normal. Let's get started shall we?"

After the normal run down of blood pressure and so on the doctor moved the ultrasound machine into place and had Emily lay down.

"I know we listened to the heartbeat before but with your age and stress levels of your job I would like to do it again and let you see the baby. And you are about twelve weeks so you should get a nice look at her." She explained.

"Awesome!" Garcia squealed. "She said 'her' too!"

Emily laughed and turned to the screen as the doctor put the gel on her abdomen. Moving the wand around a bit the heartbeat was heard. Emily's world seemed to slow at that very moment. The fast beating of her baby's heart was the sweetest sound she had ever heard even if she heard it before. She just couldn't get over it. Tears pricked her eyes and Garcia squeezed her hand. "That's amazing." She whispered.

"Look right there." The doctor pointed.

_My baby_

The black and gray image made Garcia clap and gasp loudly but Emily just stared. She had been waiting for this moment for so long that it didn't seem real. But it was.

Her hand wandered to her stomach and her other hand reached for the screen. Moving her fingers over the image she let out silent tears.

_This was happening._

-CM-CM-

Walking back into the BAU Emily quickly made her way to her desk putting her bag down and turned to Reid. "Spence, amniocentesis, go!"

"Ah, well an amniocentesis is performed between the 15th and 20th week of pregnancy. A needle is inserted through the abdominal wall, then through the wall of the uterus, and finally into the amniotic sac. With the use of an ultrasound the physician punctures the sac and extracts amniotic fluid. Back in the 70's the rate of miscarriages were rather high 1 in 200 but now it's more 1 in 1,200. While it is used for detecting Down syndrome, Turners syndrome and Edwards syndrome in many countries it is illegal due to the fact the sex can be determined."

"And my age being a factor should I do it?" she asked.

"Emily, I can tell you the facts and all but I can't tell you to do it. It's your baby." He said sweetly. "What does your doctor recommend?"

"She says I should. I'm nearly 42 and the risk of Down syndrome is greater along with other problems."

"Then I would suggest taking her advice." He smiled.

"Thanks Spence." She turned to the piles of paperwork on her desk.

-CM-CM-

Hotch watched as she came in from his office window. Over the past few weeks he found himself watching her more and more. She was changing already even though anyone who just looks at her couldn't see it. But he could tell. He knew every inch of her body. He knew every freckle and every scar.

Her hips were growing wider but only slightly. Emily had always been very thin with just a little curves but now she was looking curvier, but in a very good way. He grinned, you wouldn't be able to tell she had a baby bump but he could. The waist band of her pants must be getting tighter he figured.

He remembered Haley complaining about not fitting into her jeans at this stage but Emily was smaller than his ex wife so it might not be as bad yet.

People would always say Haley glowed but he never saw it. He did notice her skin looking healthier but not glowing. Maybe he just didn't understand the expression. But Emily… she radiated. He knew it was just hormones but Emily looked beautiful.

"Hotch?" JJ walked into his office disturbing his staring.

"Yes?" he asked trying to pull his eyes off the laughing woman in the bullpen.

"Here" she handed him a file. "Quit staring at her, she will notice."

"I'm not…"

"Yes you are." she interrupted. "Are you doing okay?" she asked sincerely.

"Okay I am. I can't help it. She just… I miss her." he admitted softly. Every time he was alone his mind wandered to her. He thought about what she was doing and what she was feeling. He became useless in his relationship with Beth. Comparing the two women he knew he couldn't be with Beth. Emily reined over her in every department but Emily didn't want him. She was happy now. She was having a baby.

**Late April 2012 (Flashback)**

Hotch sat down on the couch next to Emily as she cuddled up next to him. He wrapped his arms around her and kissed her head. "What's on your mind? You've been quiet all night." They decided to have nice night in but every time he went to say something she was in another place. It was starting to worry him.

She took a minute then looked up at him. The look on her face was serious so he sat up straighter and turned more into her. "It's okay honey just tell me." He encouraged.

"Can I ask you a question?" he nodded. "Be honest, do you want more kids?" she bit her lip and waited.

He was silently going over his answer and he hoped it wouldn't upset her. "No"

"Oh" her face fell and confusion was written all over it.

"I have Jack. And I love being a father but I will not put another child in danger like I did with Jack." He quickly said. After Foyet killed Haley he promised himself he would never put his son in another situation like that and to have more kids or even another wife would give more opportunity to any of the Unsub's they take down.

"I'm just gunna go to bed." She quickly got up and went to their bedroom.

"Em?" he tried to get her back but after the door closed in his face he figured she needed time alone. He went back to the couch and took a seat knowing he just broke her heart but he couldn't change his mind.

Not even for her.

**Early September 2012 (Present Time)**

"She misses you too." JJ broke through to him.

"She told me to stay away. Plus she's having a baby." He said but it was mainly to himself.

"She is. How do you feel about that?"

Hotch grinned a little. JJ was like the mother hen of the BAU. She was always there for anyone in need. He missed that when she was away at the State Department. "I'm happy for her. She always wanted a baby and I didn't want that. Now she has it."

"Why don't you?"

"JJ, I can't put any more people in danger." He walked to his desk after one last look at the brunette through the window.

"She wouldn't tell me but is this why you broke up?" she asked curiously.

He didn't really want to tell her why they broke up but JJ had a way of getting to things that nobody wanted others to know. "No it isn't. We did discuss it but it wasn't why we broke up. When I told her I didn't want kids I think it crushed her but I believe she would have been okay with it eventually."

JJ realized that was as much as she was getting when he opened her file and signed his name. She quietly took the signed document and left the office.

Hotch put his head in his hands and closed his eyes. He didn't want to think about the day Emily left their home. It was messy and heartbreaking. And he would never be able to put it back together.


	6. Chapter 6

A/N: Thanks for the reviews. I know everyone is curious about why they broke up but all I can tell you is there is a very vague hint at it in chapter 5 but other than that you'll just have to wait a few more chapters.

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

Chapter Six: Birthday

**October 2012 (Present Time)**

Morgan paced the hallway. "Emily hurry up" he said to the closed door. "We're gonna to be late."

"I'm sorry really, but I can't find anything to wear." She yelled out.

"Didn't you and JJ just go shopping for something?" he asked impatiently. He remembered clearly the two women talking about it the other day.

"Yes but you have to understand I'm growing like no other. Every other day I get bigger." she moaned.

He laughed quietly. The baby bump was a little more pronounced but she was nowhere near big. "Em, it really doesn't matter what you wear. Go in sweats and a tee shirt."

The door opened quickly. "Derek, I'm not going to my birthday dinner in pajamas. Here zip this." She walked out in a nice red dress and black sensible heels.

Zipping her up, he smiled. "You look nice. Now let's go."

It was tradition to go to dinner on any of the team's birthdays. Although, Emily wanted to forget this one she was excited to spend time away from the office and any talk of the horrors they see every day.

As Emily and Morgan walked into the restaurant she noticed the only chairs open where both next to Hotch. She inwardly groaned. Over the past few weeks she had successfully avoided her unit chief. She stuck to Morgan like glue on cases and in the office she made sure to give JJ her paperwork when the blonde went to give Hotch hers. She only spoke to him about the case and even when she saw Jack it was hello goodbye that's it. And she liked it that way. She was able to think about herself and not him.

"Birthday girl sit by me!" Garcia pointed to the chair between herself and Hotch.

Emily smiled and took the seat while Morgan took the one on the other side of Hotch. "Have you been waiting long?" she asked.

"Nope. They just got us the table." Dave said.

Emily smirked at Morgan. "See we weren't late."

"Whatever Princess." He shot back.

Dinner proceeded on and it wasn't as bad as Emily thought it would be. She easily found conversation on Garcia's side of the table and wasn't forced to talk to the man next to her. Every so often though she would feel him move and she could feel his body heat. Every which way she turned her senses were assaulted by him. Her hand ached to reach out and touch him like she use to but she resisted. This is why she stayed away from him she reminded herself. Anytime she got near him her body wouldn't listen to her mind.

**February 2012 (Flashback)**

Emily slowly nodded to Hotch who was looking at her questionably. As he gathered everyone's attention she bit her lip. She hoped everyone would take this in stride and be happy for the new couple but if not she was at least happy they couldn't make a big scene in a crowded restaurant.

"I have a few announcements. First thanks for coming tonight on such short notice but I have something important I want you all to know. I hope it's not a huge surprise because I don't think we have been as subtle as we think but Emily and I are dating. We both know the policies on inter-office dating but we are going to work hard on keeping it out of the office." He stopped as Morgan put a hand up.

"Sorry to interrupt but sorry guys we kind of figured it out." He smiled at Emily.

She chuckled as everyone agreed with him. "Well then pay for your own food and we will see you on Monday." She quipped.

"Oh hey wait I didn't know." Reid said innocently.

"Ok so we pay for Reid's." she smiled smugly at Hotch.

"We are happy for you guys. It was about time." Dave interjected.

"What does that mean?" Hotch frowned.

"Come on Aaron, you have been divorced for nearly five years." Dave said patting his friend on the back.

"So what?" he said.

"Honey he's just saying that's too long." Emily comforted but silently agreed with Dave. Five years was too long.

"And you missy!" Garcia pointed at Emily.

"What about me?" Hotch grinned as Emily took her turn to be ridiculed.

"You haven't been on a date in forever!" JJ said. "I even told you to go out with Mick but no you had to go out and get a cat instead."

"Hey that's not fair. I love Sergio. Besides how do you know I didn't date in Paris?" she smiled cheekily.

Hotch frowned. "Did you?"

"No but that's not the point. I have dated I just choose not to talk about it."

"Sure you have Princess." Morgan rolled his eyes as everyone laughed.

Hotch smiled at Emily as she let out a breath. She was glad they were good with it because even if they weren't she wasn't going to change it.

**October 2012 (Present Time)**

Emily remembered how Hotch reached under the table and took her hand that night. The feeling she got from that small touch was more than she ever felt with another man. And now she desperately wanted that again but she would just have to find it elsewhere because Hotch was off limits.

"So did you get the amnio results back?" Reid asked from across the table pulling everyone's attention to Emily.

She smiled shyly trying to take her mind off the thoughts she was having and onto something else. "Yes I did."

"And?" JJ insisted.

"The baby is perfectly healthy and there isn't anything to worry about." She knew what they were really after but she wanted them to beg. It was just fun that way.

"Come on gumdrop, tell us!" Garcia took her hand.

"Okay I will tell you the sex but I'm keeping the name to myself." Emily smiled.

"You already have a name?" JJ asked. "I didn't pick Henry's till I was in the hospital."

"Well I found out two days ago what the baby is so I spent some time thinking about it. I have a first name but not a middle name yet."

"Enough stalling, tell us!" Dave said smiling.

"My baby is a girl." She smiled proudly. She was secretly thrilled she was having a girl. If it was a boy she would be just as proud but to have the mother daughter bond that she so desperately wanted as a young girl was something else entirely.

"A girl! I get to buy pink!" Garcia clapped. "Not that I don't like buying for my favorite god son but pink!" she smiled at JJ.

"I know. It will be nice to have you buy for someone other than my son though. He has too much as it is." JJ smiled. "I'm so happy for you Em." The others whole heartedly agreed.

"Thanks guys. Garcia you are not allowed to go crazy! I mean it." She knew what JJ's spare bedroom looked like. Garcia had a tendency to buy, buy, and buy.

"But Em, all we have are boys. This is going to be so nice." The blonde moaned.

"What does your mother think?" Dave asked changing the subject.

"I kind of keep putting it off. I mean the last time I saw her…"

"We were together?" Hotch knew that was the last time. It was the moment he completely and utterly fell in love with Emily Prentiss.

**Late February 2012 (Flashback)**

Hotch watched with wide eyes as Elizabeth Prentiss paced back and forth. Emily just spilled the beans about them dating and the Ambassador hadn't spoken yet. He looked to his right and tried to smile at the brunette next to him but in all honesty he was scared to death.

"Mother" Emily said finally.

"Don't you dare Mother me. Have you thought about this Emily?" the Ambassador stopped pacing.

"Of course I have." She rolled her eyes. Hotch grinned slightly.

"What about you reputation? You chose this career to separate your reputation from me but now you are sleeping with your boss! How is this any different? What are people going to think?"

"First I don't care what people think. Second I didn't choose this to get away from you but to do what I love. I love my job and I'm good at it. And I know us dating is going to put pressure on the team but we can handle it. I love him and I don't care what others think about my reputation. I don't care what the Ambassador thinks either, all I want to know is what my mom thinks. This is the first time in I don't know how long, I have actually wanted you to get to know the person I'm with. I want you to know the man I love." She stopped panting slightly with tears in her eyes.

The room was silent for a moment and Hotch really wanted to just grab Emily and leave. But he stayed blinking a few times to push his own tears away. That was the first time she said those words. And in that moment he knew he wanted to say them back. Pulling on her hand he stood up. He opened his mouth to say it but she cut him off.

"I know that came out wrong and you don't have to so it back."

Smirking at her he pulled her into his arms and whispered in her ear "I love you too."

**October 2012 (Present Time)**

"Yeah" she replied snapping him back as their eyes met. Hotch quickly cleared his throat as Emily diverted her gaze.

"But I haven't told her about the baby." She looked back at Dave.

"You need to. I'm sure she will be thrilled." He replied.

"Maybe" she shrugged.

As dinner passed and everyone was getting ready to leave Hotch took Emily's hand under the table. "Congratulations Emily, I'm happy for you ya know?" Hotch said quietly so the group wouldn't hear. He looked into her eyes and knew she felt it too. The undeniable connection they have always amazed him and even now when they were barely able to speak to one another he could feel it.

"Thanks Hotch." she smiled back but reminded herself to leave it at that.


	7. Chapter 7

A/N: I'm happy everyone likes this story. I love writing it so keep letting me know what you think.

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

Chapter Seven: The Ambassador

**November 2012 (Present Time)**

Emily knocked on the door lightly hoping not to disturb the occupant too much.

"Come in" the voice said.

Emily took a breath and stuck her chin out and squared her shoulders turning the handle and pushing the heavy door open. She stepped in the large office and looked at the person behind the desk with their nose in a paper. "Hello Mother"

Elizabeth Prentiss looked up and smiled softly. "Emily dear, what brings you by?" she stood up and walked around her desk.

"I need to talk to you. Is daddy here?" She replied taking her light jacket off.

"He's at the club golfing. Retirement just drove him to become lazy so he spends most of his time there." Elizabeth's eyes nearly popped out of her head at the small curve in her daughter's abdomen. "'He' got you pregnant?"

Emily frowned slightly. "No 'he' didn't." she practically spat out.

"Well honey you are pregnant. What am I suppose to think?" the ambassador crossed her arms and sat back on the desk as Emily took a seat in the chair opposite.

"Aaron and I broke up some time ago, Mother. The baby is mine. I was artificially inseminated." Emily said proudly. Whether her mother liked it or not she was happy and whatever the ambassador said she would stay that way.

Elizabeth chuckled then smiled. "Sounds like you."

"What?"

"It's just that if someone can't give you something you get it yourself. It's not a bad thing. You make me proud you know."

Emily was speechless. Her mother was not a person who said things like that especially to her. Emily made many mistakes as a teenager, from going out partying to getting pregnant. She finally admitted the pregnancy to her mother some time ago which put even more hidden struggles between the two women.

Emily did feel guilty for the problems she caused in those days but at the same time she realized she was just acting out to gain the attention from her parents. Growing up she never hand the bond to either of them and now that she was going to have a baby she promised herself she would have the relationship she wanted with her child.

Her childhood consisted of growing up with nannies. Her mother was always at work and her father was too busy with 'the guys'. It wasn't the childhood she wanted.

"I-I…" she stuttered.

"Emily, I know I'm not the best parent in the world but you do make me proud you have to know that. You forged your own way in life and never backed down from what you want or what you believe in." Elizabeth reached for Emily's hand.

"Thanks mom." Emily smiled with tears in her eyes.

Elizabeth pulled her daughter into a hug and held her tight. "Oh honey, I love you so much and I'm so happy for you."

Emily pulled back and smiled. "It's a girl." She wiped her face. She knew not everything between them was resolved with just those words but it was a great start. She wanted her baby to have the over indulgent grandparents and maybe now she would.

"A girl. Wow I'm going to be a Grandmother." The other woman laughed.

-CM-CM-

The next day as Emily walked into the BAU she was still in a daze. After she told her mother about the baby they went out for lunch and talked. Really talked. She was thrilled by the end of the night as they made plans to meet up for the next doctor's appointment so 'Grandma' could be there.

Emily sat at her desk with a strange grin on her face when Reid walked over and handed her a box. "What's this?" she questioned.

"Well I remembered JJ had one when she was pregnant with Henry and I thought since you are more involved in the horrible things we see and I figures you would want to protect the fetus…"

"Baby Reid!" she rolled her eyes and opened the box. "Ear phones and music for the baby?"

"You know between 20 and 23 weeks the baby can start to hear things outside of the womb and I figured…"

Emily smiled and enveloped him in a hug. "Thanks Reid. That's sweet."

"Yeah Reid, that's so sweet." Morgan laughed as her turned in his chair.

"Morgan" Emily frowned at him which made him clamp his mouth shut and turn back around. "Reid, don't listen to him. Thanks for looking out for the baby." She grabbed his hand.

He smiled sweetly in his innocent way and they went back to work.

"So how far are you now?" JJ asked as the three women sat around the small table near the kitchenette.

"Almost 19 weeks." Emily smiled popping an apple slice in her mouth.

"Have you felt her move yet?" JJ first felt the flutters from Henry at 20 weeks but she knew it happens sometime earlier.

"I felt some fluttering but I wasn't sure what it was but that's about it." She chuckled. After feeling the flutters she 'Googled' it and came up with the baby's first movements.

"That's how it starts but soon it will be karate practice on your organs." JJ smiled.

"Emily, JJ and I have been thinking and I know you're not big on the whole idea of a baby shower but can we please do one?" Garcia spoke up. Her mind was working on a way to ask and not be so 'Garcia' about it because she really wanted to do this for her best friend.

Emily looked at Garcia. The blonde was almost pouting. She chuckled and nodded her agreement. "On one condition." She said sternly.

"Yes ma'am, anything you want." Garcia said smiling widely.

"Make it small and I don't want anything over the top. My mother is already begging to let me have her…"

"Wait! You told your mom?" JJ asked.

Emily smiled shyly. She didn't talk about her family much with anyone but now that her relationship with the ambassador was on the mend she didn't mind so much. "Yeah, yesterday we talked and it was actually really good."

"That's great Em." Garcia squeezed her hand.

"It really was. You have to understand, my parents and I never got along. We never talked like at all but yesterday with my mom it was… I don't know. It was nice to finally tell her how I feel and she actually listened."

"I'm glad, you deserve that. So do you think your mother would like to help with the baby shower?"

"I don't know and isn't it kind of early to have a baby shower anyways?"

"Yes but with our work schedule we need to get a head start. When are you due?" JJ asked.

"April 19th"

"So probably have it either the last weeks of March or the beginning of April."

"Ladies you do know it's only November?" she asked giggling.

"Yes but we thought it might take us a few weeks to convince you to agree." The all laughed.

Hotch rounded the corner and held back the smile he wanted to show at the sound of her laugh. It had been a long time since he heard it.

**Late March 2012 (Flashback)**

Hotch sighed again for the umpteenth time in the past few minutes. He looked to the woman sitting next to him in his bed. Her shoulder length dark hair was hanging around her face as her nose was stuck in a book. He kept trying to get her attention but no avail. All she does is hum at him and pull away. It was driving him crazy. Is it so hard for a guy to get a little attention from his girlfriend? He certainly didn't think so.

"Em" he snuggled up close to her and started placing soft kisses to her exposed neck.

Emily wiggled away and tried hard to hide her smirk. "Busy" she said calmly.

"No" he moaned kissing up her neck to her cheek. "Put it down."

"Busy" she said again hoping her voice didn't waver too much.

"No" he said again going to her ear and gently sucking and nibbling the way she liked.

Emily giggled and tossed the book down. "What do you want?" she looked at him.

"I just want a little attention." He smiled.

"I'm sure that's all you want!" she laughed as his hands tickled at her sides.

The sound of her laughing made him laugh too. It always did. Her beautiful smile always made him smile even when he was in the worst possible mood. She was just like that.

"I love your laugh." He whispered moving his lips over her face and finally to her lips as they calmed down. "You always bring a smile to my face."

Emily chuckled "I try my best." She kissed him softly.

**November 2012 (Present Time)**

Hotch cleared his throat along with his mind and walked up to the table. "Ladies, we have a case. Briefing in ten." He nodded at them but his eyes lingered a little too long on Emily and she ducked her head and turned away. He watched her walk away sadly.

Over the weekend he took the time to really think about what he wants and what is best for Jack and at the end of the day Emily is the only one who made him feel at home. And that is what his son and he needed.

He also broke things off with Beth. He thought she would understand but with her reaction he thought wrong. She flew into a rage but he just told her he couldn't be with her if he couldn't ever be in love with her. That seemed to only piss her off more but that's how it was. The day after he turned off his cell to make her understand he was done. And by Monday he guessed she did.

"I didn't get anything sir." Garcia said gathering her belongings from the table.

"No this one came to me." He said walking away trying to get his mind back at work.


	8. Chapter 8

**A/N:** I hope you like this chapter. It is one of my favorites. I did give you some of Hotch's reasons in breaking it off with Emily just not exactly how he did it. That will be very soon though. And I hope this chapter starts to change some of your minds about Hotch. Some of you have said you don't like him but don't count him out just yet. He does things for a reason. He is Hotch! Give him a chance.

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

Chapter Eight: Thankful

**November 2012 (Present Time)**

As everyone filed into the jet to go home a week later Emily sat down next to Dave and closed her eyes. She was oddly at peace. Normally after a case her mind would be in questions. Why the Unsub did this? Could it have been stopped sooner? Did they make the right choices? But now all she could think about was going home to have a nice week off. Hotch graciously asked the director to give the team a stand down week and Emily was looking forward to spending it in the peace and quiet of her own home.

"So what is everyone doing for Thanksgiving?" Dave asked breaking the silence after a half hour in the air.

"I was going to go home to my Mom's but my sisters and her are going to my Aunt's so I guess I'm here." Morgan spoke up.

"I'm here too." Reid said. "Garcia invited me over."

"Aaron what are you and Jack doing? Getting together with Beth?" Dave asked.

Hotch looked up as his name was called. "Oh, no I'm no longer seeing Beth so it will probably be just Jack and I because Jessica is going to her parents." he looked away again not wanted to see everyone's expressions.

"Em?"

"I'm not sure yet but my Mother invited me over." She said opening her eyes. It had surprised her when the Ambassador called and asked her to come for a nice family Thanksgiving but at the same time she felt like a giddy little girl. It made her excited to spend time with her parents and that was not something she ever thought would happen.

"JJ, are you going to your parents or staying home?" Dave asked the blonde laying on the couch.

"Will and I are going to stay home. I travel so much I just want to be at home." she explained. "Plus lugging a 3 year old around is not fun."

"Well since everyone is staying home why don't we all get together? We can have it at my place. And I'm sure Garcia and I could pull off a great meal." He smiled. After the first cooking lesson he gave the team he enjoyed having the team over.

"That sounds great man. How about you Pretty Boy?" Morgan said. Reid nodded eagerly.

"Are you sure Dave? That's a lot of people." JJ asked concerned. Just her small family ate a lot. "Maybe we can all bring a side dish so you don't have to cook it all."

"JJ that sounds great. I expect you, Will, and Henry. You too, Emily." Dave said eyeing the brunette.

"Sure" Emily smiled. "I might sneak out early though to see my parents."

"Aaron? You and Jack."

At that Emily perked up a bit. Not seeing Hotch but seeing Jack. She missed the boy tremendously.

Hotch looked up again prepared to deny the offer but saw the slight smile on Emily's face and her dark eyes light up. Maybe she would like him to come. "Sure, we'll be there."

Emily's gaze landed on his and her smile dropped. Letting out a sigh she told herself if she wanted to see Jack she would just have to get over not being around Hotch. But everyone was going to be there so maybe it wouldn't be so bad.

-CM-CM-

**Thanksgiving Day 2012 (Present Time)**

Emily knocked on Dave's door holding her bag of dinner rolls. She didn't want to end up poisoning her team with anything homemade so she decided to just buy rolls at the nearest bakery and bring that as her side.

"Come in. Happy Turkey day!" Garcia answered the door with a bright smile.

Emily smiled and handed her the rolls. "Here you go." She slipped in the door and took off her coat and hung it on the rack.

"Em, you were supposed to cook something." The blonde pouted following the brunette into the main area where the rest of the team waited.

"Sorry but I don't think you want me to cook you anything." She smiled as Jack shrieked from across the room.

"Emily!" he dropped his father's hand and ran to the woman.

"Jack!" Emily bent down to hug him. "How are you?"

"I'm good. I missed you though." He sighed sadly and took her offered hand as they joined the group.

"I missed you too sweetie." she smiled at him ruffling his sandy blonde hair. "Smells good Dave." She kissed the man's cheek and went to hug JJ.

"I worked my best." Dave beamed.

"Uncle Dave all you had to do was boss Aunt Pen around from your seat. How is that hard?" Jack asked in all seriousness.

Emily and JJ laughed as Dave gave a stern look to the boy. "It was hard little man. Trust me."

Jack shook his head and looked up at Emily. "It didn't look it."

The crowd all laughed and quickly took the seats around the dinner table. Dave sat at the head of the table with JJ Henry, Will, and Reid to his right and Emily, Jack, Morgan and Hotch to his left and Garcia at the other end. Jack and to beg to sit by Emily but the boy's dimpled grin won his father over in the end.

"Before we start why don't we go around and tell what we are thankful for. Who wants to start?" Dave said looking around.

Garcia spoke up and began. As Emily listened she was also trying to figure out what she was thankful for. She had had a very crazy year so far and all in all it was a good one. Glancing at Hotch she realized he was the only thing she wasn't thrilled with the outcome in the past eleven months. But then she thought if it didn't happen the tiny baby growing in her would not have been so in the end she was thankful she and Hotch didn't work out.

"I'm thankful for pumpkin pie!" Jack said proudly. "What? It's not funny." He frowned as everyone laughed.

"Jack, is there anything else you might be thankful for besides food?" Hotch schooled his face to not anger his son more.

Jack thought and then frowned "Yes but I don't think I should say it out loud."

"Why Buddy?"

"It's not nice." He said plainly.

"Then why are you thankful for it?" Hotch frowned.

"Jack why don't you tell me and then I will see it you should say it." Emily looked at Hotch and received a nod in reassurance.

Jack climbed from his seat into her lap and put his arms around her neck placing his mouth near her ear. "I'm thankful Daddy doesn't see Beth anymore. I don't like her." then he pulled back to see the shocked look on her face. "I shouldn't say that right?"

Emily smiled weakly and nodded. "I don't think you should honey. It could hurt someone's feelings." As she looked over Jack's head Hotch was staring at her.

By the look on Emily's face Hotch knew what his son was saying. Beth. He knew his son was less than thrilled with the woman especially since he was so attached to Emily. "Why don't we dig in?"

"Sure let's eat everyone." Dave stood to carve the turkey. "So are you ladies doing the whole Black Friday thing?"

"Yes! I'm making Em go to because she could get a good deal on some baby stuff and I have two very cute boys to shop for." Garcia said happily as Emily and JJ groaned, both not looking forward to the early morning shopping trip.

Jack stayed in Emily's lap for the remainder of the meal which she didn't mind. Hotch tried several times to get the boy to get off but he wouldn't budge.

Hotch watched the two carefully. His mind was going in five different directions. He had decided to tell Emily why he really broke things off with her. He couldn't stand her hating him anymore. After the meal was done and Emily was sitting alone watch Jack and Henry playing chess with Reid he made his move.

"Hey, can we talk for a second?" he said standing in front of her.

"Oh, yeah sure." She figured it was about what Jack said earlier. She stood and followed him to Dave's office a few rooms down from the rest of the group. She took a seat in Dave's chair and Hotch paced the room. She frowned "Hotch what's wrong?"

"I don't know how to start this but I guess it should be I'm sorry." He stopped pacing was sat across from her. "I'm sorry for hurting you. You didn't deserve that."

Emily didn't know exactly where he was going with it but she didn't mind him groveling. "Okay"

"I think you deserve to know my reasoning for breaking up with you. Do you remember the case in Florida back in May? Joseph Phillips…"

"Beat raped and murdered those sight women. Yes why?" she really had no clue as to why he would bring that case up. It was so long ago but she did remember. It was awful. The women were tortured beyond anything she had ever seen.

"After we caught him you and I went in to interrogate him but he kept making these comments about you and I sent you out." At her nod he continued. "Well after you left…"

**Early May 2012 (Flashback)**

Hotch made sure the door was shut in the interrogation room before turning back to face the bastard that tore eight women apart. "Don't you ever say anything about her or I will make your life a living hell." He spat out at the man who was making comments about his girlfriend.

Joseph Phillips laughed and his eyes bore into Hotch's. "You don't scare me."

Hotch fisted his hand in an attempt not to grab the Unsub and crush his head against the concrete wall behind him. "You should be. Don't look at her, don't talk about her, and don't even think about her."

"So she's yours huh? Well just know you can't protect her forever."

Suddenly Joseph's face was gone and George Foyet's face was laughing up at him. Hotch snapped. Grabbing the man and pulling in up from the chair and pinning him against the wall all Hotch saw was red. He was screaming at him not really sure exactly what he was saying but as arms came from behind him he was pulled off and Foyet was gone. Phillips looked at him with a grin on his face.

**Thanksgiving Day 2012 (Present Time)**

Hotch sat silently as Emily took everything in. Taking a breath he said carefully "I had to protect you and if ending things with you would do that then I had to." He wasn't sure what she was thinking but he hoped this would let her see he did it for a reason.

Emily's eyes snapped to his. "I'm sorry you went through that but" she stopped and schooled her expression "when are you going to learn, I don't need protection." She pushed off the chair and left the room. She honestly was sorry that he faced that but the words he spoke to her the night she left were the ones that hurt the most and she wasn't ready to forgive that yet.

**A/N**: If anyone doesn't know Black Friday is the day after thanksgiving and it is one of the biggest shopping days. Most stores have big sells for Christmas. I have only been once and after watching two older women get into a fist fight over sheets I promised never to go again.


	9. Chapter 9

A/N: Thanks for all the reviews and comments. Please keep them coming. I have finally given in and now you will read what really happened. Enjoy and don't kill me. Happy ending I promise!

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

Chapter Nine: Protecting

**Early January 2013 (Present Time)**

At the knock at his office door Hotch looked up from his paperwork and nodded to Dave. "Come on in."

"I was just about to head out but I wanted to check up on you." Dave took a seat across from the desk and folded his hands in his lap.

"Check up on me?" Hotch questioned even though he knew what his friend was talking about. The past week had been rough on the whole team, another case involving children. He also knew the team was worried something was going on with him. Sure he had been distant over the past month or so but it wasn't anything too abnormal. He wasn't one for sharing his feelings or bringing personal problems into work but he was struggling over the past month with Emily.

After telling Emily about his reasons for leaving she froze him completely out. And for the life of him he wasn't sure how to fix it. But he knew he needed to.

"What's been going on? And why didn't you tell me before that you and Beth broke up?" Dave asked. He was quite stunned when Hotch told the team on the plane almost two months ago. Dave wanted to ask about it sooner but with the Holiday breaks and then the cases right after he didn't have time. Another book tour took most of his personal time.

"I knew it wasn't going anywhere so I needed to break it off." He answered without any emotion.

Dave studied him for a moment and then frowned. "Why would you date someone if you're still in love with Emily?"

Hotch's mouth opened and closed quickly. He didn't think anyone would figure that out but apparently his friend and mentor did. "Truth?" he asked sitting back for a long conversation he knew was just around the corner.

"Yes please." Dave said also getting comfortable. These conversations were normal for the two men especially if one was having a hard time.

"I started dating Beth to make Emily hate me." He said simply.

"What? Why would you do a stupid thing like that?" The older man wanted to slap the back of the other's head. _Young people these days._ He sighed.

"I know it was stupid but if she didn't hate me then I wouldn't have been able to stay away. Dave, I can't, no I won't let Emily end up like Haley." He took a breath "an Unsub threatened her while we were dating and it got to me. Everyone I care about gets hurt and I will not let the only woman that I can't live without get hurt. I know you will say it's not true but it is. Now I think I can live without being able to touch her or hold her but I can't live without her breathing on this earth. And if her being alive and… her being happy means I have to stay away then I will." Hotch wiped at his eyes tearing up. "Dating Beth was just to make sure Emily was safe, in a way."

Dave didn't know what to say. Yes his friend was stupid but part of him understood that. Hotch was terrorized by Foyet. His wife was murdered by this man. And lastly Hotch killed him with his bare hands. That is something you never forget or forgive yourself for. It stays with you and you change which was happening to Hotch. Dave knew Hotch blamed himself for Haley's death and Jack being put in that situation but he didn't know it was still in the back of his mind. Hotch had gone to a specailist to talk to about everything so Dave assumed he was good now.

Then after Hotch and Emily were together Hotch seem different, dare he say happier than he has ever seen him. Emily brought so much out of him and the team noticed. After they split no one asked questions so Dave had no clue this is what really tore them apart.

"Aaron, I understand you wanting to protect her but I think if you don't stop blaming yourself for Foyet's actions you will never be happy. And Emily is the only person who brings that out in you. You don't need to protect her. She is a very tough lady. She can handle her own, she did with Doyle."

"And she almost died." Hotch interrupted. "And she did that for us. So I broke her heart and mine for her. I can't lose her in this world Dave. I know I was a bastard and I probably said things to her that will never be forgotten but she is safer without me."

"But can you really truly and honestly live without being near her? Ask yourself that Aaron because from what I see you can't." Dave watched Hotch's face fall. He was right. Dave didn't know what he would do if the situation was reversed but he did know Hotch needed Emily.

"I don't know." he whispered. "She is everything to me… and to Jack. He adores her more than words can say. He still cries for her sometimes." He remembered the night that Emily left Jack to his father he hated him.

**May 2012 (Flashback)**

Hotch stood in the door way of his son's room as Emily was telling him goodbye. His heart was ripped in two and he knew his son's would be too.

"Jack?" he said walking in.

"Go away! I hate you!" Jack cried crawling up the bed and stuffing his face into his pillow. "You made Emily leave!"

Emily turned to Hotch with tears streaming down her face. "I'm sorry" she whispered and walked out.

Hotch nodded and went to his son's side. "Buddy I know you're upset but it's going to be okay."

Jack looked up and him and screamed "Go away! I hate you!" the boy's eyes were red and puffy and his face was splotchy.

"Jack you don't mean that. I know your upset but we don't say mean things." He said calmly running his hand down Jack's back.

"I do mean it. You said mean things to Emily. And now she is leaving me just like mommy. It's your fault!" Jack cried out swatting his father's hand away. "Leave me alone."

Hotch wiped the tears from his cheeks and just sat watching his son cry himself to sleep. As the boy lolled off he ran his hand through the sandy blond hair and whispered. "I'm so sorry son. But she had to leave. I can't let her get hurt."

**Early January 2013 (Present Time)**

"See Jack needs her too. I don't know what to tell you Aaron but you need to fix it. But before you do that forgive yourself. You don't know what will happen in the future. She could get killed in the field but she could as easily get killed walking across the street. Don't let that stop you from living. Don't let that stop you from loving."

Hotch opened his desk drawer and took out a photograph of Emily and Jack. They had both passed out on the couch after a day at the park. It was his favorite. Running his finger over her sleeping face he smiled. "I'll work on it." He promised. "But I'm sure she will listen. I said what I needed to to get her to leave and it wasn't nice."

"What did you say?"

"Let's just say she found the engagement ring I got for her and I told her it was Haley's." Hotch looked down.

"Aaron" Dave whined. "Just fix it."

-CM-CM-

Emily saw the little boys face frown as he played with his food. Boredom was setting in as he sat back in his chair and slouched with his arms crossed over his chest. "Jack honey, are we being boring?" she asked. She knew what his answer would be.

Jack sighed with a nod. He was excited to be with Emily but when they got to the restaurant with Aunt Pen and Aunt JJ he just got bored and tired of talking about nothing but the baby.

"I'm sorry Jack. Baby talk is kind of boring huh?" JJ asked reaching over and ruffling his hair.

"Yes it is. The baby isn't even here." he frowned further. He didn't like talking about the baby.

"I know. Sorry Jack. What would you like to talk about?" Emily said smiling at him.

"Can I ask you a question?" his face morphing into a small smile as his eyes darted towards Garcia.

"Of course sweetie, you can ask me anything."

"Will you still love me when the baby is here?" he asked putting on his saddest face possible.

Garcia and JJ awed at him which he glared back at them until they turned away. Emily smiled down at him. "Jack I will always love you. You are my favorite little Jack."

"Okay. What's the baby's name going to be?" Jack asked smugly looking up at her then his eyes went back to Garcia.

"What? No you didn't!" Emily looked from Jack to Garcia. "Did you seriously just play me?" she asked Jack.

"No I didn't." he smiled sweetly.

"Penelope Garcia, why did you corrupt my sweet little Jack?" Emily glared at the woman.

JJ laughed and Garcia looked at Jack for help. "Aunt Pen you told me to do it. I can't get in trouble for this. I'm just sweet little Jack." The seriousness in his voice made Emily crack a small grin.

"Jackster I can't believe you are selling me out!" the blonde sneered.

"Come on Pen; look at that cute little face." JJ pointed at his big brown eyes then leaned over to Garcia. "Haven't you learned yet it's the cute one's you can't trust." She joked.

"Well I have learned my lesson now. No more Jack, no more." She huffed eyeing the boy.

"Aunt Pen, I'm sorry. Please don't be mad at me. I can't help it if I'm cute. I was born this way." He smirked as the table of women busted out laughing.

"Oh my goodness, Jack. Where do you learn this from?" Emily asked trying to calm her laughing.

"Uncle Derek said I'm a ladies' man. What does that mean?"

"It means we are never letting Uncle Derek babysit again." JJ said grabbing the bill from the waiter and grabbing at her coat. "Let's go guys. Come on ladies' man."

Emily helped Jack into his coat and took his hand. "You ready to go home buddy?"

Jack shook his head "no can't I go with you?"

"Well I don't have much to do tonight so how about we have a sleepover?" Emily smiled.

"Can I call daddy and tell him?" Jack nodded eagerly.

"Of course"

-CM-CM-

Emily pushed the last box from her bedroom into the hallway. Over Christmas she received a ton of baby things and she finally had time to clean out the spare room to get all the baby things into it.

"Hey Princess" Morgan called out as he entered her apartment.

"Hey, thanks for helping me with this. My parents went overboard so now all the baby's things are scattered around the apartment until I can get the spare room packed up and moved to the office." She said showing him the room in question.

Morgan smiled and looked at the room he was enlisted to move. "All this is going to fit in the office?"

"I hope but if not some of it can go in my room." She pointed down the hall.

"Okay let's get started. Do you have boxes for the small stuff?"

"Yes I do." She ran down the hall to get them. "Here we go." She said starting to load up some loose things.

"So what are your plans for the nursery?" Morgan asked moving some things around.

"Not sure yet but I needed to get this done. My Mother bribed Garcia into figuring out what I liked so they bought the crib and a dresser. They also got other things which was really nice but I have no where to put it all."

"So you're getting along better?"

"Yeah, my Mother calls almost every week and she always calls if I have a doctor's appointment. It's nice though. They're really trying."

"That's great Em." He opened a drawer and took out some photos that were in it. "Can I ask you something?"

"Sure" she said with her back to him tossing a few things into the hallway for the trash.

"What happened with you and Hotch?" he asked calmly handing her the pictures he found. "The past few months you both have been… I don't know, out of it."

Emily looked at the pictures of her and Hotch. She tried her best to avoid him lately and she knew the team would start noticing. "We just didn't want the same things."

"I don't believe that. And I don't think you do either." He could always tell when she was holding back. "Talk to me Em."

She sighed softly. She didn't want to talk about it. She didn't want to think about it but for all of her wishing that's all she thought about. "I just wish guys would understand women don't need protection. We can take care of ourselves."

"Oh, did he go overboard?"

"You can put it that way. He left me to keep me safe. He's scared that I will end up like Haley." She sat down on the bed. It pissed her off that he would even think that. Not pissed at him but at Foyet for making this fear live in Hotch.

"Well you kind of did that too. You left the team and went after to Doyle to protect us." Watching her face turn he was quick to explain. "What I mean is when you left us it was hard but we forgave you. You were doing the best you could even if we didn't agree. Maybe that is the only thing he thought he could do."

"I do get it and yes I feel bad that's the only thing he could think to do but Derek you didn't hear what he said to me. It was…"

"Tell me Princess." He urged.

Emily took a deep breath to steady her nerves and nodded.

**May 2012 (Flashback)**

Emily walked into the kitchen to see Aaron staring off into space. She smiled softly and walked up behind him wrapping her arms around his back. He tensed under her and she pulled back with a frown. "What's wrong?"

"I think we need to break up." He said calmly. Emily's head whipped up and she grabbed his head turning him to look at her.

"What? What are you talking about?" she spat out. Her heart was pounding so hard she could barely hear anything over it.

"I think we need to breakup. We want different things and I think we have played out all we have." The words he was saying didn't match the pain she saw in his dark eyes.

Emily shook her head almost violently. "No. We are not breaking up. What the hell is going on Aaron?" she barely got out as her stomach started to roll and her eyes filled with tears but she held them back.

"I-I don't want this anymore. I think you need to move out." He stuttered.

"I don't believe you." She took off to their bedroom and dug through his sock drawer. She knew it was in there. Finding it weeks ago she figured he was waiting for the perfect time but they had been crazy busy with work and Jack. Grabbing the small box she went back to the kitchen where he still stood. "If that's how you feel then why do you have this?" she tossed the box to him.

"Where did you find this?" he said in a harsh tone. His eyes flamed at her but she took it.

"I found it weeks ago. Why buy it if you were just going to leave me?" she challenged.

He stared at her for a moment. "It's not yours. It's Haley's and it will never be yours." he pocketed the ring and grabbed Emily's arm. "I'm never going to marry you."

Emily pushed him away and wiped her tear stained cheeks. "I hate you!" she cried as her heart shattered into a million pieces right there in the kitchen.

"Good. I don't want to be with you. Leave." He stared at her.

Emily looked up in anger at Hotch. She wanted to scream and stomp but she didn't. The little boy in the next room could hear every word and she was not going to let him hear what she really wanted to say to his father. Taking a breath she whispered harshly "I want to talk to Jack then I'll leave." Without waiting for an answer she stormed around the corner and knocked on Jack's door.

**Early January 2013 (Present Time)**

Morgan watched Emily break down after telling him. He wrapped his arms around her and kissed her head. "I'm so sorry Emily."

"Me too. God Derek, I do love him but how do I forgive that. And if what he said was true why leave me like that? I just don't understand." Emily calmed down and grabbed a box to fill it.

"Emily, why don't you ask him? I mean if his reasons are true ask him why he did that."

Emily bit her lip and sighed. "I don't know if I can. I don't understand why he would say those things to me and why date Beth? If he wanted to protect me why date someone else putting them in the same danger?"

"To make you hate him. Emily he knows you better than anyone so he must have been prepared to put on a good show to make sure you believed him."

"I don't know. Can we just finish this and go grab some food. Baby's hungry!" she didn't want to think about it anymore.

"Yeah we can." Derek smiled and started packing again.

A/N: Please remember the second flashback was Emily's point in it not Hotch's. Next chapter will have what he was thinking through it.


	10. Chapter 10

**A/N:** So sorry about the wait! Life took a few turns but I'm getting back on track so here is the next chapter. I hope your all still with me and enjoying the story.

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

Chapter Ten: The Talk

**January 2013 (Present time)**

Emily looked up from her desk to Hotch's office. All week she debated going up there and giving him a piece of her mind but then she thought about what Morgan told her a week ago and her anger turned to something else. She wasn't sure what exactly but some part of her sympathized with Hotch. He didn't handle things well at all and for that she was pissed and completely broken hearted but she questioned whether or not she could forgive him for that.

And on the other hand Morgan said it best, she did the same when she left the team to go after Doyle alone. He was trying to protect her. Emily knew Hotch loved her but could that love be enough to heal the hurt caused by his words and actions she wasn't so sure.

Making up her mind Emily tossed her pen aside and stood from her desk. Running her hand through her hair and calming her nerves she took to the stairs and right into his office. "Got a minute?" she asked softly at the open doorway.

Hotch looked up and nodded. The look on Emily's face told him this was not going to a nice conversation that they had been pretending to have over the past few weeks. "Come on in." he gestured to the chair and watched her take the seat.

"How's Jack?" Emily asked wiping her damp palms on her dress pants and mentally rolled her eyes at herself. _Wimp, just get it out already!_

"Good" Hotch smiled slightly.

"That's good." she smiled back. "I know this isn't the right place for this and I'm sorry for that but I have been sitting down there debating whether or not to come up here and I just need to get this out. So just listen." She said so fast she had to stop to inhale.

Hotch sat back and readied himself for the anger and hurt the brunette was about to unleash on him. Nodding at her he knew he deserved everything she was about to say.

"I don't understand and I'm not sure I ever will but I need you to understand how much you hurt me. Hotch you broke me so completely that I'm not sure how to put myself together again. Out of nowhere you break up with me and tell me you don't want me." She stood and stated pacing the small office. "Then not but a few weeks later you start dating someone else and now you're telling me that you did all this to protect me. I just don't understand! You could have just stopped at dumping me but no you had to parade your dating life in front of me. Why in the world would you do that? Do you even care about my feelings at all?" she stared into his eyes unwavering. "You're an ass and I came in here thinking I could be calm and collected but I'm sorry I can't. I'm so mad at you and I don't know if I can forgive you. You hurt me so much but…" she stopped feeling the baby kicking inside her.

Hotch looked on in awe as her face morphed into a bright smile. He felt his face lighten too. With his heart racing his hope was building that she would somehow let him back into her life. "But?" he said with a raised brow.

"Maybe it was a blessing. If you hadn't done this I wouldn't have her." Emily rested her hand on her stomach. "I thought when we were together that I could be happy without being a mother but I was wrong. I want her more than anything and I know this is harsh but if I have to lose you to have her I think I'm okay with that." She probably could have worded it better but it all made sense. Being a mother was something she wanted more than anything but with Hotch she settled for being a stepmother to Jack, which wasn't a bad thing and she still wanted that but a baby of her own was her dream and Hotch couldn't give that to her.

Hotch's face fell and his mind went blank. His whole world was falling apart and he couldn't stop it and to top it off he started it. "I-I don't know what to say."

Emily took in his frown and some of her felt bad for that but after her rant she felt lighter and somewhat happier. Her eyes dropped to her unborn child and she smiled. "That's okay." She looked back to him. "I know you're sorry and that's all I need. I'm tired of going over and over this and right now I just want to enjoy what I do have so if your good then let's just put this behind us and focus on just working and living our own lives." Life without him would be hard but she could do it. The past eight months were a testament to her strength and will.

Nodding in answer was all he could do. He didn't want to live his own life. Hotch wanted her in his life but he couldn't ask for that, not after what he put her through.

Emily smiled and headed out the door. "Goodnight Hotch."

"Night" he whispered as she disappeared. Running his hands over his face he sighed and closed his eyes. "The ring was yours." He said into the empty office as he roughly pushed the files on his desk to the floor.

-CM-CM-

Opening the door quietly Hotch made his way over to his sleeping son's bed and placed a kiss to his forehead. Watching Jack sleep after a long day seemed to be the only thing to settle him these days. It seemed to him Jack was the only good thing left in his life that could make him happy and he took full advantage of that.

Making himself comfortable in the chair beside the bed Hotch thought about what Emily said to him earlier and even though it crushed him he knew she was right. Parents sacrifice many things for their children and if he was being honest he would leave any woman for his son. And for Emily to say that she would give him up for her baby was only natural. She would be an amazing mother, selfless and gentle. Jack took to her in no time at all and she was great with him.

**March 2012 (Flashback)**

Hotch helped Jack into his seat and softly shut the car door. Settling into his own seat Hotch turned around and smiled at Jack. "So buddy what did you think of Miss Emily?"

Jack looked up from his toy cars in his lap and shrugged "She's nice."

Expecting a little more Hotch asked "Is she nice enough to hang out with us sometimes?"

"I guess so as long as you take care of her and she doesn't get hurt." The boy said in a serious tone.

Hotch tried to hide his chuckle "I will Jack. Do you think we should ask her to come with us next weekend t ride the rollercoaster's?"

"Yeah, she said she liked those! That would be so cool dad! Can we call her?"

"Sure when we get home." Hotch patted the boy's knee then turned around and started the car.

"After the rollercoaster's we can go for ice cream and then maybe she can come to my soccer game. Dad does Emily like soccer? If not I can play something else." Jack rambled on.

"Jack, I'm sure Emily would love to go to your soccer game. You don't have to change sports because of her." Hotch rolled his eyes and shook his head at his son. The kid was just too cute.

**January 2013 (Present Time)**

Hotch remembered the phone call to Emily when they got home that day from the park. He couldn't get a word in as Jack talked to Emily for almost half an hour straight about all the things they were going to do. Then told Emily goodbye and hung up like his father didn't need to talk at all.

Moving a few strands of dirty blonde hair Hotch kissed Jack's head and left the room. Even if Emily was ready to move on without him he wasn't going to give up on them. Not only did he need her but Jack did too and like she implied parents would do just about anything for their kids. And so would he. He just had to figure out how.

**A/N:** Sorry it's shorter than the normal chapters but I didn't want to clog it down with more and take away from Emily and Hotch conversation.


	11. Chapter 11

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

Chapter Eleven: Mission

**Late January 2013 (Present Time)**

Hotch looked both ways down the hall before knocking on the closed door in front of him. Being the Unit Chief he knew he could go anywhere in the building and no one would get concerned but at the moment he didn't want anyone seeing him going into this office especially since he was supposed to be in a 'budget meeting' with the Section Chief.

"Come in" the voice from the other side made it to his ears and with one last look over his shoulder he cracked open the door and squeezed in making sure to close the door behind him. Turning around he awkwardly looked at the blonde in front of him.

"Boss, you need something?" Garcia smiled slightly amused at his weird behavior.

"Y-yes I do." He nodded. He need her help but he wasn't so sure she would be willing. After all she was the 'missions' best friend and she could turn him down or even worse give him up and then all hell would break lose. Taking his chances he moved around the small room and came to stand next to the tech's computer system. "I want to ask you for a favor but it has to stay quiet."

That peaked the blonde's interest and she quirked an eyebrow. "Top secret sir." She promised. How could she say no? The dark haired man in front of her was one for rules. He didn't go outside those rule for anything so for him to come to her with something no one else was privileged to hear was something she couldn't miss out on.

Eyeing her for a moment he gave in. "I need some advice and maybe a little help. I made a huge mistake and I have to fix it and not just for me but for Jack…"

"Wait hold the phone, you want help with Emily?" she might be in everyone's business from time to time but to help the man who broke her best friend's heart was not going to fly.

"Yes" he said simply. _No more sugar coating_. "I need her back and so does Jack." _Good play the kid card Hotchner!_

Shaking her head and standing from her wheelie chair Garcia looked up at him. "Jack hasn't lost her. He gets to see her and he knows she loves him. If I may sir you are the one that lost her, no not even that you are the one that kicked her to the side in favor of that brunette bimbo."

Hotch was about to cut in again but stopped himself. He asked for this. Not directly but by coming to Emily's friend he opened the door for the verbal assault. Nodding in understanding he breathed in and took to the door.

"Wait! Where are you going?" Garcia asked putting a hand on his arm stopping his movements. "I didn't say I wouldn't help. I just needed to get that off my chest before I help fix the mess you made."

Hotch slowly turned to her with a genuine smile on his face. "You'll help me?"

"Of course. I can't let our very own Ken and Barbie stay broken up forever, can I?" she asked getting back in her chair and spinning to her station.

"Who and what?" he frowned.

"Oh nothing sir." She smiled. "First we need to…"

"Penelope?"

She looked up at him half stunned and half excited. He never uses her given name. "Yes sir?"

"Thank you. Really thank you."

"You are more than welcome sir so on with the plan." She turned around again and started typing furiously. "You need to woo her. And I don't mean candy and flowers but something more. I know she still loves you but you really did hurt her."

"I know I did. And I'm truly sorry for it. We talked the other day and she kind of forgave me. She said it was a blessing. Whatever that means." He ran his hand over his face. He had been beating himself up for the past few days for not telling her what he really wanted to say when they talked but after the way she seemed to move on in those moments he didn't want to keep dragging her through the mud which was their barely-there relationship. She looked like the weight she had been carrying for months was finally lifted and he couldn't put that on her again but at the same time he needs that too. The weight off his shoulders and his life back together.

"Sir, she really wants this baby. Emily is going to be a great mother and she deserves to be happy so if me helping you is going to take that from he please tell me now." Garcia thought back to Emily telling her Hotch didn't want more kids. And now the Emily's baby fast approaching Garcia didn't want any part of hurting that family Emily is trying so hard to build. "If you want Emily you have to want her baby too. Can you do that?"

He never really thought about the baby when he thought of getting Emily back. For the life of him he didn't know why it never crossed his mind until now but it didn't. "I-I don't know." he said honestly.

Garcia stopped all actions and stared at him. She could see the fear in his eyes and his mind working over it. "We can't do this if you aren't in it for the long haul. She can't take it again. And I won't be a part of it." She got to her feet sending him a weak smile and left her office.

Hotch was left confused as ever debating whether he could take both Emily and her baby.

-CM-CM-

After leaving the empty office a few minutes later Hotch made his way to his own office and buried his head in his hands trying to fight off the headache forming due to over thinking. The questions still raced through his mind even after attempting to do some work but they didn't stop.

A baby.

Emily's baby.

Pushing his chair back from the desk he leaned back and closed his eyes. He never wanted this. He had his son and that was all he ever wanted. Jack was amazing and in every way a dream child but that was it for him. He wasn't one of those men who needed a basketball team made from his offspring. Being a good father for Jack was enough but it came back to Emily.

Emily was the 'one' as they say but having the one meant having another baby. Emily's baby.

Looking out his window he found the woman in question and a small smile tugged at his lips. She was beautiful. Pregnancy agreed with her. When Hailey was pregnant with Jack she was beautiful but Emily was more. He couldn't take his eyes off her. Hotch tried with all his might to not stare but on more than one occasion Dave had to kick him to get his attention back on work and not her.

"Sir?" Hotch was pulled from his staring and turned his attention to the intern at his door.

"Yes?"

"I was told to give this to you." She said weakly handing him a letter.

"Thank you." He said as she walked out. Opening the letter Hotch suppressed his chuckle.

**SIR,**

**If we have a mission meet me at 802 W. Anderson.**

**12pm Saturday afternoon.**

**I'll be wearing pink.**

**PG**

Rolling his eyes he placed the letter in his briefcase then turned back to the window. The bright smile on Emily's face while she talked to Reid made his choice that much easier.

There was a mission.

-CM-CM-

At 11:58 am Saturday afternoon Hotch walked into the corner bakery and glanced over the crowd. Seeing his 'spy' sitting in the corner with her shades on and a pink top he maneuvered his way to her. "Hello" he smiled.

Looking around Garcia relaxed. "Hello sir, so do we have a mission?" she whispered.

Hotch held in his laugh and nodded. "We do. I want them both."

"Great!" she almost squealed but covered her mouth quickly with her hand. "That's great sir." she said again as her eyes darted around the room.

"So what's with the sunglasses?" he pointed out. He knew she was getting a little carried away but really?

"Sir as happy as I am to help you on this secret mission I can't be seen with you. You are still the enemy so to speak and I'm not willing to be a traitor." She said in all seriousness. Emily was her friend and she need to stay as loyal as possible if this was going to blow up in their faces.

"Okay, where do we start?" he said changing the subject and getting a move on with the plan.

"Well sir, prepare to be surprised." She gave a knowing smile as the two of them got down to business.

Hotch smiled as the blonde described the plan to him, maybe this would work after all.

A/N: So no flashback in this chapter. The time lines are coming together so there are only a few flashbacks left and this chapter was just too much fun to put one in. Please let me know what you think and if you're still interested in this story. And yes I know I've been watching a few too many spy movies lately. :) Sorry!


	12. Chapter 12

**A/N**: First thank you for the reviews I appreciate the time you take to send a few words my way. Second I just wanted to apologize to the reviewer who was not happy about Garcia's description of Beth. No she probably wouldn't call someone she doesn't know a 'bimbo' on the show but for what she was doing in this story, calling Hotch out on the crap he put Emily through, I think it was okay. She was just making a point but anyways sorry you weren't happy about that. I'm a die-hard Hotly fan and I tend to hate on Beth quite a bit, just FYI. Now on to Garcia and Hotch's plans!

Disclaimer: I own nothing!

Chapter Twelve: Phase 1

**Early February 2013 (Present Time)**

Hotch paced the floor of his office for the umpteenth time then stopped. Turning to the blonde tech he asked "What do I say to her?" his face was soft and his eyes pleading. It had been a week since he asked the blonde for help winning over Emily but every time Garcia gave him a goal he chickened out. Not little chicken outs big ones, like standing in front of the brunette with his mouth open and no words coming out. Embarrassed was an understatement but Garcia kept on him. And his goal now was just to talk to Emily. Just for him to open his mouth and for words to come out.

Garcia smiled sadly at the man in front of her. "Anything. Just start talking to her. This process is going to be slow especially since you're barely on speaking terms" his huff interrupted her but she continued on "and your recent attempts at talking to her but you just need to go back to the beginning."

"The beginning of what?" he asked confusion taking over again.

Rolling her eyes Garcia stood up from her perch in Hotch's chair and went to the window looking out over the bull pen where Emily sat with her face buried in mountains of paperwork. "You need to get her to trust you again, confide in you, not only as her boss or lover but as her friend. Let's face it our Gumdrop doesn't trust easily nor does she forgive easily but you, sir, broke that trust she once had in you. Fix it. Just start talking and let her get use to you again." She said opening the door and taking her leave. Sure she would help him but she wasn't going to hold his hand through it.

Hotch watched her go then turned to the window. "Trust" he whispered giving himself a small pep talk. "Just talk to her."

-CM-CM-

Emily closed the file she was working on and with a groan flipped the next one open. With Reid and Rossi at a conference in Boston the rest of the team was left to pick up on their regular consults and Emily for one was not too happy about it. Even with help from Morgan and JJ she hated doing it. She would much rather be on a plane to anywhere to catch a 'bad guy'. She would take a serial killer over the paperwork any day.

She lived for that rush though. The adrenaline that took over her body when they were this close to catching the bad guy was her drug, her addiction. It empowered her. It probably did the same to everyone on the team. But she hadn't felt that in so long. Hotch and Strauss finally made her give up on the traveling with the team now that she was further along in her pregnancy. She still got to work the cases but from her desk or Garcia's lair. Emily knew Garcia loved having her here but the brunette dearly missed being in the action. But being a mother was more than the job could ever be so she kept the complaining to a minimum.

Looking up Emily's instincts were buzzing. Eyes were on her. It wasn't the creepy stalker eyes but someone was staring at her. Her eyes darted around the office then up to connect with the dark orbs of Hotch. _Bingo!_ She half heartedly smiled at him then turned back to her work. More often than not when she got that sinking feeling of someone staring at her it was him.

Over the past few weeks after their talk she noticed him doing it more often. It didn't bother her much because he did it more when they were together. It was oddly comforting… in a weird way.

**March 2012 (Flashback)**

Emily smiled as she looked up to Hotch's office window. From her seat she could tell his eyes were darker than normal and they burned her's when they connected. As his dimples poked out she felt her body react. Those dimples and eyes got her every time. Her core tightened and her heart beat rapidly sped up.

Throwing her pen down and looking around the room to make sure no one would notice she took to the stairs and quietly went into his office. Stopping short by the look on his face her breath caught in her throat.

"Hey" his low husky voice washed over her. Her legs seemed to melt on scene and she couldn't tell if she was even standing anymore. "Close the door." He stated his eyes not leaving hers.

Coming back to herself she walked backwards letting her back rest against the now closed door. "You were doing it again." she finally found her voice. Her eyes also darkening in want and desire.

"Can't help it." He shrugged stalking towards her. "I can't keep my eyes off you."

As soon as his hands found her waist she reacted. Hands wrapped around his neck she quickly covered his lips with her own. Feeling his tongue running against her bottom lip she happily let him in with a deep moan from the back of her throat.

Soon their kiss went from passionate to hot and heavy and hands groped unbuttoning shirts and raising skirts. Needing air Emily pulled back and rested her forehead on his. "We have to stop before…"

"I know." he sighed. "You have to stop wearing red to work."

Emily chuckled looking down at the red blouse hanging off of her. "I like wearing red." She teased.

"I like it too but if you want to remain professional in the office I suggest you only wear it at home." he said taking in the damage his hands had done. "Sorry" he apologized trying to button her top back up but finding some of the buttons were missing.

"Don't worry about it." Emily kissed his cheek softly. "Just promise there's more when we get home."

**Early February 2013 (Present Time)**

"Emily?" Hotch waved his hand in front of Emily's face for the second time. After catching him staring he decided to come down to talk to her but she was lost in dreamland or something.

Shaking her head Emily's eyes snapped to the man next to her "What?"

"Are you okay?" he asked concern dripping from his words.

"Uhh… yeah. Yeah, I'm fine. Do you need something?" she asked slightly embarrassed. She took to moving around her paperwork even though she knew she would have to put it back after he left but she couldn't look at him, especially after having a day dream about him. _Stupid hormones!_

"No… yes. I mean no, I don't need anything but I was uh… hoping maybe you would like to come to dinner tomorrow at my house… I uh… Jack misses you and wanted me to ask." He spit out so fast he wasn't sure she even heard him. After opening his mouth he didn't know what to say. Jack just seemed like a good buffer. Garcia was going to kill him. _The goal was to talk to her not have her come to your house moron!_

"I'm not sure. I miss Jack too but I'm not sure about us spending time together outside the office is a good idea." She said finally meeting his gaze. "You were…" she motioned to his window.

"Doing it again? Yeah I know, sorry." His cheeks reddened slightly. He knew she caught him but honestly he couldn't help it. Even if he isn't looking out the window for her his gaze always made it that way. He couldn't control it.

Sighing softly Emily nodded. "I'm sorry too." She stood up and turned to him. "Can I take Jack on Saturday?" she asked. "Take him to the park or something?"

Hotch nodded slowly. "Yeah, I'll tell him." about to walk away with his tail between his legs he grabbed her arm and let his confidence take over. "I can't help it when you're wearing red." He whispered in her ear then he walked over to Morgan's desk to get the agent's finished files.

Emily felt her legs melt again and sat down in her chair before she ended up falling on the floor. Her mind was buzzing and her heart was racing as she looked at his retreating back. It shouldn't surprise her when she felt like this around him because she often did but every time it took her a minute to get over it. Shaking her head to get the thoughts of him out she went back to work.

"What was that about?" Garcia asked Emily after witnessing the exchange between her best friend and her partner in crime.

"Oh, nothing. Jack misses me and wants to see me." Emily replied keeping her head in the file.

"Oh okay. Here is another case." She said handing over a file then turned in her pink heels and got her target in sight. Garcia walked up behind Hotch and tapped his shoulder.

"Yes?" he turned. His face drained at the stare he got from the blonde.

"Jack?" she asked suppressing her urge to roll her eyes.

"But I did talk." Hotch defended himself. Al least he was able to make words this time.

"Whatever. Let's just move on to phase 2." She took off to her lair.


	13. Chapter 13

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

Chapter 13: Valentine's Day

**February 12th 2013 (Present Time)**

"What are you doing for Valentine's day?" Garcia asked Emily as they gathered at the round table early in the morning.

"Ugh. Nothing thank god!" Emily replied after falling into her chair next to Morgan. She was never one of those women that thought if they didn't have a date on valentines it was the end of the world. To her it was just a 'hallmark holiday' made up to get people to spend big bucks on jewelry and candy.

"Why not? Emily you ready need to have some fun." Garcia looked as if the brunette was crazy. Garcia lived for this holiday. Boys, chocolate, and pretty gifts! What's not to love!

Emily laughed and squeezed the tech's hand. "I'm far too pregnant to having any kind of fun on a date and anyways I really need to get moving on decorating the nursery."

"What if I told you I know a nice guy that would love to take you out for Valentine's? And before you ask he is good looking, has a great job, very intelligent and I know the two of you will get along great." The blonde was tired of waiting for Hotch to 'take the bull by the horns' so to speak so she was perfectly happy to do it for him.

Emily groans and looked to Morgan for help. "Please don't let her do this to me." She begged.

"Sorry Princess, I'm not going to tell her she can't do this." He said getting the evil eye from Garcia.

"Thanks a lot!" she growled. "Garcia, I really appreciate your help finding me a date but I really don't want to go out. Plus does this guy of yours know I'm seven and a half months pregnant? I don't see a sane guy going on a date with a pregnant woman. There must be something wrong with him."

"For your information he does know and he thinks you're and I quote 'completely sunning and mesmerizing' so there's that and there is nothing wrong with him. I wouldn't set you up with a creep. Emily please do this." At that moment JJ and Hotch walked into the room and took their seats. "JJ, great! Please tell Gumdrop she needs to go on this date."

Emily turned to the other blonde with a glare. She really didn't want this. It wasn't the first time her friends tried to set her up but it was the first time she really didn't want to go. She would just feel awkward and she really didn't want that.

"Em, I think you should. You haven't been out in so long." JJ ignored the glare and agreed with Garcia.

"Ha! See we all think you should." Garcia smiled.

"Morgan didn't say he agreed just that he knew better than to stop you." Emily defended.

"Okay fine let's take a vote. Morgan, yes or no to Em going on a date for Valentine's Day?"

"Y-yes. Sorry princess." He said dodging the flying fist the brunette swung his way.

"Reid?" JJ questioned the resident genius who was lost to the conversation and his nose in a book.

"Huh?" Reid looked up confused.

"Em going on a date, yes or no?" Garcia said with a pointed stare.

He looked to Emily "Well you haven't been on a date in six…"

"Hush. I know how long it's been thank you very much." Emily interrupted. She knew it had been a long time but honestly she was fine with that. She was happy in her life right now and adding the drama and stress of dating didn't seem like a fun idea. Sure sometimes she got lonely but after dating Hotch all the guys that she considered didn't measure up. She feared no one would.

"So that's a yes. Rossi the great what is your vote?" the smiling blonde asked.

"Sure why not. Em it'll be fun." he smiled at Emily but quickly looked away and went back to his work in fear of the pregnant agent taking a swing at him as well.

"Hotch what do you think?" JJ asked.

Hotch swallowed. For one he didn't want to pressure Emily into going on a date. She didn't respond well to being forced to do things she didn't want to. And for two he wasn't sure what Garcia had up her sleeve. Was this 'date' with him or someone else? "I-I don't think I should get a vote." He said quickly.

Emily half smiled at him. "At least someone is on my side."

"Boss man you do to get a vote." Garcia eyed him. _Hint, hint Hotch!_

"I'll just leave this to you and anyways I think we need to start." He said taking the small remote and turning on the flat screen and pulled up the images of their next case.

"Fine but Em you are still out numbered so you are going on this date." Garcia rolled her eyes at Hotch and went about passing Reid his paper copies of the case file.

-CM-CM-

**February 14th 2013 (Present Time)**

Emily hated watching the team go off on a case without her. She hated it almost as much as sitting by the phone in Garcia's office with the nervous blonde waiting for a call to say the take down of the Unsub went well and they were coming home.

Putting a hand over the bouncing knee of the tech Emily squeezed gently "its okay. It hasn't been that long. I'm sure they are all okay."

Garcia nodded with a half hearted smile but didn't say anything. Her mind was still working over Morgan's last call to her. The Unsub had taken a hostage and now they were going through 27 floors of a business building trying to find him. She knew that took time but over three hours?

"Let's talk about something." Emily said trying to get the blonde's attention from the phone she was staring at. "So I think I might do a home birth. I read that it could be less stressful both on me and the baby."

That got the tech's attention. "Really? What does your doctor think?"

Emily smiled to herself with an imaginary pat on the back. "She said as long as everything is going well in my last few weeks and there are no foreseeable complications. I'm not sure I will go through with it but I do think it would be nice. You know I hate hospitals."

"You do." Garcia agreed. "Would you just have a midwife or something?"

"Yeah, and my mom will be there and you and JJ if you are comfortable with that. I mean not in the room with me and all the nastiness but at my house."

"I would love that! Oh my gosh yes!" Garcia was out of her seat and hugging Emily within seconds. "I would love to be there for Lil' Princess' birth."

Emily's smile widened just thinking about it. She was close to eight months and that was just another step closer to seeing her perfect little baby. She still had yet to actually prepare for the baby and most of the gifts her parents got her at Christmas were still in their boxes in the spare room she had Morgan clean out but as she got closer it was really hitting her.

Some mornings she still woke up thinking it was a dream but then looking down at her swollen belly she thanked God it wasn't. Even though it was going to be hard on her own she was determined to do everything she could to bring her baby into this world healthy and loved. And surrounding herself with the love of her parents and friend was a piece of that. They will be as much a part of her child's life as she will be. So having Garcia and JJ with her at the birth would be a no brainer.

"I don't think I could ever do what you are." Garcia said sitting back down and glancing at the phone.

"What?" Emily questioned.

"Being a single parent. Don't get me wrong I think you are going to be an amazing mother and this baby isn't going to hurt for anything but I don't think I could do it. I'm not strong like you."

Emily all out laughed at that. Garcia not strong? Yeah right. "You are too. You send your family out every other day to find Unsubs and wait like this for word that they are okay. I'm going completely crazy here. You also sit here looking at all this…" she motioned to the computers and the board with the pictures of the victims hanging off it. "You see more than we do to tell you the truth. I couldn't do this. You are so much stronger than I am." Emily took the blonde's hand in hers. "If you weren't with me these past few weeks waiting for the call I don't think I would still be here."

Garcia shook her head. "But you are the ones that go out and find these creeps. All I do is sit here."

"Oh Penelope, you give us way too much credit. We just have death wishes. You are strong and don't ever say you aren't." Emily joked with a wink. "Plus my daughter needs a strong Auntie Penelope."

Garcia smiled at that and both women jumped when the phone rang. With a hand over her heart and a deep breath the blonde answered. When a smile lit up Garcia's face Emily knew the team was fine and on the way home. Grabbing her files and bag she kissed Garcia's head and made her way to the bullpen.

Putting away her open files and cleaning up her desk she relished in the quiet of the empty room. Normally it was jammed pack with people and noise but for eight at night it was nice and calm with only a few lights left on and only one or two interns turning in their work.

For the past few weeks she loved this time. After 'the call' she would book it back to her desk to soak in the quiet as her mind worked over the case and did her best to move past anything she was hanging onto about it. Now that she wasn't allowed to travel with the team she felt as if she lived at the office. It was her home now and she liked being there when it was quiet. It soothed her in a weird way, taking all her stress away.

"They are on the way home and we have tomorrow off. Everything went smoothly and no one was hurt." Garcia said into the darkened room to Emily.

"Good. Are you headed out?" Emily asked grabbing her purse from the bottom drawer.

"Yes ma'am." She smiled. "Are you ready for your date?" she asked as they both walked into the open elevator.

"No, but I guess I have to be. I'm glad he understood I couldn't go tonight." Emily said remembering Garcia said she would call and make the date for the day after Valentine's since the case would call it close.

"Yeah, he didn't mind." She smiled trying to keep her laugh to herself. Hotch didn't mind at all. Going on a date when he was a few states away was not going to cut it.

"Good, well goodnight. See you on Monday except if I kill you for the bad date." Emily said walking to her car.

"You're going to have fun. Have a nice weekend." Garcia replied with a grin.

**A/N:** No flashback in this one but I hope you liked the Emily/Garcia banter. They just kind of took over this chapter and wouldn't give it back. Date in the next chapter!


	14. Chapter 14

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

Chapter 14: Surprise Date

**February 15****th**** 2013 (Present Time)**

"Penelope, are you sure this guy isn't going to be a creep?" Emily asked "I just don't know if I can deal with that today."

"I promise Gumdrop. He is a good guy and you are going to thank me after this date. Just trust me." The blonde said over the phone.

"Fine, but I can't find anything to wear! Can I go in sweats?" she was only half joking. They say pregnant women just pop well she popped and more. These days she felt more and more like a floating blimp than a pregnant woman. Emily leaned against the closet door sighing heavily at all the dresses she once could fit into but now she couldn't. Reaching in and fingering a deep purple knee length dress she wore on her first date with Hotch, she remembered opening the door that night and seeing his dark orbs taking her in. It still made her stomach twinge.

**February 2012 (Flashback)**

Emily nervously ran her hands through her dark locks and eyed herself closely in the bathroom mirror. "Not too bad" she whispered to herself then straightened out her purple dress. Getting ready to go on a date with her boss is not something she ever planned to do but after spending time with Hotch after her return she was more excited than anything. It was easy to talk with him. For one he understood what she went through with Doyle and two he never laid into her about her choices. He just listened and gave her the support she needed to put it behind her.

Putting on her black heels she exited the bathroom and round the corner to her bedroom. "Sergio, what do you think?" she asked the black cat laying on her bed. Getting nothing out of him she huffed. "Lot of help you are!"

At the knock on the door she took a few soothing breathes then opened the heavy door. Her chocolate eyes met those of his dark browns and her breath caught.

"Hey" he smiled looking her up and down. Emily's knees almost gave out right there. She could see his eyes growing darker and his face trying to hold back the desire they were both feeling. His eyes gave her tingles every time he looked at her.

"Hey, let me get my coat." She smiled finally finding her voice. As she turned away from him Emily's smiled grew even wider. If dating her boss was going to feel like this every time she was near him bring it on, she thought as she pulled her coat on and grabbed her purse.

**February 15****th**** 2013 (Present Time)**

"Emily you are going to look great in anything. Just please don't go in sweats. Try pink and pretty!" the blonde on the other end of the phone said bringing Emily out of her thoughts.

"I don't really do pink, Garcia. Not my best color." She laughed. If Garcia had her way everyone in the world would be in bright colors. Settling on a loose black dress that slimmed down her protruding belly Emily took her sensible heels and headed out of her room.

"Fine just no sweats. And be nice! Now I have to go, I am busy ya know." Garcia told her and they ended the call.

Walking down the hall the boxes filling the nursery caught her eye so she opened the door wider and flipped on the light.

"Ugh." She whined looking at all the work she was in for when her maternity leave came. It probably wouldn't get all done but what could she do. She was hoping to work as long as possible but she figured she would take her leave before her due date to prepare the apartment and the baby's room. Looking at her watch she had some time before her date would be there so she set out to get some of the smaller things out of boxes and layout the room as best as possible.

At the knock at the door Emily was so immersed in her work that she barely heard it but as the persistent man on the other side kept knocking she finally ran to the door and opened it.

"Hotch, what are you doing here? I have a date in like… now." She said retreating back into her apartment looking for her heels and checking herself in the entryway mirror.

"That's why I'm here." Hotch said with a smile taking her appearance in. She was slightly flushed from the run to the door and her hair had been tossed around making the curls loosen.

"I really don't have time for this. My date will be here any minute and I really don't want to fight with you. Please just leave." She said locking eyes with him.

Hotch cocked an eye brow. Clearly she wasn't getting it and he was in no hurry to have his balls chopped off so he said silent. He expected the door to slam in his face anyways so her not realizing he was her date wasn't half as bad.

Emily huffed. "Fine what in the heck is wrong now? The fact that I'm going on a date…" she paused looking at his nice sports coat and a single rose in his hand. "Wait… what are you doing here?"

Taking a deep breath Hotch held up the rose to her and whispered "I'm here for our date. Happy late Valentine's day."

Emily quickly shook her head. "No, you are not my date." It couldn't be. Garcia wouldn't do that to her, she thought. "I can't believe this." She spat when he nodded. Turning on her heel she stomped her way to the couch and sat down. Her blood was boiling and not in a good way. "How could she do this? I don't know how many times I have to tell her we are NOT getting back together… ever." Her tone was harsh but she didn't care one bit. This was not going to happen.

"Emily, Garcia didn't do this. I mean she kind of did but I went to her for help and basically begged her which I know is not professional but I want another chance. I need another chance with you." He said walking over to her and bending down in front of her. "Please Em, just go on this date with me and if you don't want any more I promise I will leave you alone." He softly raised a hand to her cheek and brushed the dark hair from her eyes. "Please just dinner and then I will bring you home."

Emily stared at him. It pissed her off that Garcia would do this to her but she got it. The blonde just wanted to help the pleading man. She couldn't fault the woman for that. She was about to crack too. Just the one touch of his fingers almost made her melt. Not many women could tell the handsome man in front of her no. Sighing softly and hanging her head in defeat she nodded slowly. "Okay" she whispered. "Just dinner"

Hotch felt all the weight on his shoulders lift at that very moment. She said yes and he couldn't be happier. His smile reached his eyes and his dimples peeked out. "Thank you." He kissed her cheek then stood taking her hand in his to help her up.

"So where are we going?" she asked locking up and following him into the elevator.

"A small Italian place just a few streets over. But if there is anywhere you want to go instead we can change it." He said. The woman had been known throughout her pregnancy to be very picky.

"Oh, no Italian sounds great. Baby hasn't had any opposition to that." She smiled running a hand over her stomach.

The restaurant was small and quiet which was what he wanted. He didn't want to take her to some big place where they could barely hear over the music and crowd, no calm and quiet was where he needed. This wasn't like a first date where they're both nervous and trying to impress the other. They dated, fell in love and lived together. He didn't want to begin again with her. But knowing Emily she wasn't going to jump right on in either so a slow burn is what Garcia told him to do.

After being seated and ordering their dinner Hotch felt her uneasiness. She shifted every few minutes and was distracted. "Emily, are you okay?" he asked.

"Yeah" she said finding his gaze and biting her bottom lip. "…Okay no… I'm not okay. This is weird and I-I don't know what to say."

Hotch chuckled. "It is weird but Em, we've dated before so it can't be that hard. Hell we lived together."

"I know but…" sighing again Emily straightened up. "I'm just trying to get a handle on this and I don't want to think about everything that went on before but I can't stop it. I don't know if I can do this."

Hotch reached over and took her hand in his mainly so she wouldn't bolt from her seat and leave him. "I get it. But if we are going to try again I think we should try to move on from the past. Let's ease into this and give it and honest try. I'm not trying to erase the past but I was kind of hoping for a clean slate plus there are more things to think about." He said referring to the unborn baby.

"She is a major factor in this and that's more of the past I'm trying to move past. Hotch you don't want more kids and I really do understand that. You have a wonderful son and that's great for you but…"

"You have a daughter. Emily I wouldn't have asked Garcia for help or even thought about us again if I wasn't in this for the long haul." He said linking their fingers together. "I want to be with you and I want your daughter to be mine. I want both of you and I know Jack does too."

Emily's heart fluttered. It was a wonderful thing for a man to say but in the back of her mind she knew at any moment he could break her heart in two just like before but now it would be breaking her baby too. Even if they got back together and all was great she still feared it would happen again. The trust he once hand with her heart was cracked and she wasn't going to give him that back anytime soon. "I think we need to take it slow like you said. I will not jump into anything."

Hotch smiled, he did just get her to agree to give them a chance so he could take that and be happy. "Okay"

After their meals were brought over they found comfortable conversation trying to avoid anymore hard topics. Emily was still weary of the situation but she let her guard down somewhat and enjoyed the time they spent together. She forgot how much they use to laugh and enjoy the others company. It was nice to have that back. When he offered her some of his dish it felt like old times. She would always eat half of whatever he got and he did the same with her.

By the time the check came Hotch had a permanent smile on his face. He hadn't fallen out of love with her over the time they were apart but now he knew he never would. He hung on every word she spoke and his eyes never left her's. He missed the way she would tuck her hair behind her ear and the way she rolled her eyes when he tried to tell a joke. It was all part of the reason why he loved her.

"You ready?" He asked after paying the bill. He was sad the night was over but he wasn't going to push for any more. She had agreed to dinner and that was all.

"Yes" she put on her coat with some assistance and they were out the door. Coming up to her apartment door she paused for a moment. She was having a great time and it was easy to fall back into their easy conversations but she really didn't want to end the night. Dinner and home she agreed to but she didn't want him to go. Getting up her nerves Emily turned to him "Is Jack at home?" she asked making sure he didn't need to get home.

"No, he's with Jessica tonight." Hotch replied letting go of her hand so she could open the door. He was surprised she hadn't taken her hand away from him yet but after he held her's in the restaurant she was holding his just as tight.

"Oh, would you like to come in?" she bit her lip nervously.

Smiling he nodded. "I would love to."

Opening her door she confessed "I was putting together some of the baby's things before you came so ignore the mess. The crib was too complicated so the pieces are all over. Morgan will have to fix it tomorrow."

"It's not a problem." He laughed walking in a taking stock of the mess coming from the guest room, he was assuming was now the nursery and ending in the living room where the box for the crib was. "Do you need any help with setting everything up?" he asked. The thought of Morgan setting up the crib where Emily's daughter would soon be sleeping made him a bit green.

"You don't have too. Morgan has been really good about getting things put together. Would you like a drink?" Emily asked steering him to the kitchen and missing the eye roll her boss just gave her at the mention of Morgan again.

"Sure but Emily I don't mind putting together her crib." He insisted.

Emily eyed him then it dawned on her. "Hotch…"

"No its fine if you want Morgan to do it. I was just offering." He said quickly then walked back into the living room and took up residence on the couch.

Emily huffed. "Way to go Em!" she berated. Walking to him she smiled. "Hotch you are more than welcome to put her crib together I wasn't even thinking when I said that about Morgan. I was just saying we are on a date and I didn't want you to be doing manual labor on our date." She said sitting down next to him.

"I didn't mean to be all cave man about it. Sorry." He apologized taking her hand again.

"It's okay. It was kind of cute." She admitted staring into his dark eyes. The twinge in her stomach caught her attention and a wide smile lit up her face. His eyes could still give her tingles.

**A/N**: This chapter was hard for some reason but I hope you like it. No Emily is not going to forgive him and making up but she is going to give him a chance. Let me know what you think!


	15. Chapter 15

A/N: Thank you for the reviews! This chapter is a lot of fluff but it sets up for the next chapter…Enjoy!

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

Chapter 15: Red Returned

**February 2013 (Present Time)**

Garcia cautiously moved to the table in the middle of the small café where both Emily and JJ sat waiting for her. Having planned this girl's lunch before she pushed the brunette on the date with their boss she was slightly worried about Emily's reaction to her and many times she thought of cancelling but she was better to face the music now than on Monday at work. Reaching the empty chair she greeted the agents with a smile. "Hey ladies."

Emily looked up at her with a scowl. "Em, before you…" Garcia started but was cut off when the brunette raised her hand.

"Garcia, I know. I know he came to you and I know you were just trying to help." Emily forgave with a soft smile.

Taking a seat Garcia smiled happily. "So you had a great time huh?" Garcia was hoping this would happen but she knew her best friend was very determined to keep away from Hotch. She spent hours consoling the brunette the night the couple broke up. Emily was broken and Garcia held her as she cried.

**May 2012 (Flashback)**

Garcia jumped at the loud knock on her door. "Hold on!" she yelled to the uninvited intruder of her personal time. Climbing off the couch and making her way to the door the knocking didn't slow. Swinging the door open with her mouth open and ready to yell at the intruder she froze. "Emily"

Emily's face was red and puffy with fresh tears streaming down her cheeks. Without a word Garcia wrapped her arms around the woman and held her up as Emily's body racked with sobs. After a few minutes standing at the door Garcia managed to get the brunette inside and closed the door behind them.

Emily's crying slowed and she looked up at Garcia "H-he…" another sob broke her voice.

The blonde shushed the woman softly and rubbed her back. She had no clue what happened but for her strong, compartmentalizing friend to show up in the shape she was in Garcia was sure it was big and not at all good. "It's okay Em. I'm here."

Almost an hour later Emily wiped her face and sat up from her position on the couch and looked at the blonde and whispered "He doesn't want to be with me. He told me to leave."

Garcia's heart broke for her friend. "What? Why? Did you fight?"

Emily shook her head. "No he just… out of the blue said he wanted to… break up. Penelope what am I going to do?" tears pooled in her eyes again.

Stunned speechless all the blonde could do was pull Emily into another hug and told her it would be okay but inside she wasn't sure what was going on.

**February 2013 (Present Time)**

"I had a nice time." Emily nodded with a smile as the server came over and took their order.

"So our lovely double agent how did you get roped into all this?" JJ asked once the server left. She knew what happened but didn't know the details.

"Well our stoic boss came to me and asked for help wooing our Gumdrop and I just felt compelled to do so. But honestly Emily I'm sorry I lied to you and I'm just thanking my lucky stars it all worked out." She laughed making the others join her.

"Me too. I'm not really up to killing anyone." She laughed. "So were you the one that told him to use the red comment? Because I have to say I nearly melted right there in the office." Emily asked taking a sip of her water.

Garcia raised an eye brow and so did JJ. "What red comment?" the tech asked.

Emily eyed her for a moment and saw the confusion. Chuckling softly and shaking her head she smiled "So that was all him." she deducted. "Well, let's just say he loves when I wear red."

Both the blondes choked out a laugh while Emily giggled and took another sip of her water.

-CM-CM-

Hotch was elbows deep in a stack of expense reports when Garcia came barreling into his office with a stack of files and her pink and purple coffee mug Monday morning. "Morning" he said not taking his eyes off his work.

"Good morning sir. Here is the next round. I placed the urgent ones on the top. Please let me know as soon as possible and just so you know our beautiful baby Mama is wearing red this morning." Garcia sang as she placed the files on his desk.

Hotch's head snapped up and his face reddened. "Excuse me?" he choked out.

"What?" she questioned with a look of innocence which he was not buying for a second. As he glared at her she smiled. "We ladies had lunch on Sunday and she might have mentioned the small comment you made last week that you neglected to tell me about. And by the way you have officially graduated from Penelope Garcia's school of dating. Congratulations!"

"Really?" he tried hard to keep his face neutral but inside he was jumping up and down like the geeky kid in school that the prom queen looked at.

"Yes sir. She couldn't stop smiling. She didn't give me too many details about the date but she did say that she was happy she went with you. So I guess our mission is over. But just a word of warning, don't break her heart again…sir."

"I won't." he smiled kindly and sent her on her way.

He sat back in his chair with a goofy grin. He was excited to see Emily again but he didn't want to rush her. It was her ball game and if she said go slow then he was determined to do so. But he was planning on asking her on another date as soon as he could. He figured they would do the dating thing for a while until she was ready to move forward.

Seeing his coffee mug empty he grabbed it and headed to the small kitchen and if he just so happened to pass by a certain agent's desk so be it.

-CM-CM-

Emily watched in envy as Morgan and Reid poured their coffee and fixed them up. Coffee use to be her strength in the morning but going without for almost eight months was driving her crazy. Most would think her addiction would go away in that many months but it hadn't. She still craved the dark liquid and often thought of just having one cup. But if she did she wouldn't stop.

Rubbing her swollen belly she reminded herself why she gave up her addiction. Her eyes caught those of Hotch's as he came walking over from his office with his mug in his hands. Growling low she rolled her eyes "Not you too."

"Good morning to you too, Prentiss." He said in his Agent Hotchner voice moving to the counter. "Is there a problem?"

"She's just sad Hotch. No coffee makes Mama grumpy." Morgan mock pouted at the brunette then took a sip and made a point to moan as the liquid made it down his throat.

"I hope it burns you." Emily scoffed crossing her arms over her chest.

Hotch chuckled. "Do you hope the same for me if I get a cup?"

Emily eyed him. "Yes. It's just not fair." She whined.

"Emily you do know doctors now say pregnant women can have one cup of black coffee per day." Reid chimed in.

Emily sighed. "That's the issue. I can have a cup but I won't stop at just one. And besides this kid doesn't need any caffeine, she is bouncing around in there like my organs are trampolines. I don't want to give her anything bad so I just suffer."

"What a good mommy!" Morgan patted her head and received a punch in his arm for it. "Ow" he said rubbing his wound and making his way to his desk and away from any physical harm that might come to him.

"Does she move often?" Hotch asked stirring his coffee.

"Yes. All the time here…" she took his free hand and placed it on her belly. "Feel that?" she asked watching his face brighten with a soft smile.

"Yeah…" he said in wonder. The small tap under his hand made his heart speed up. Feeling the movements always stunned him. Before Jack was born he would spend time talking to Hailey's belly and feeling for the little taps of his unborn son. It amazed him every time.

Emily stared at him. His normal stress lines disappeared from his forehead and his dimples peeked out. "Amazing huh?"

"It is." He smiled at her as he took his hand away. Looking around him he noticed the other agents had now gone back to work…_Alone!_ "I was wondering if you would like to go on a date with me next Saturday." He nearly whispered not wanting other's to overhear. Work was work and personal life was to stay out of the office but he could wait any longer.

With her mouth hanging open to answer Emily was interrupted by Strauss walking up to them.

"Agent Hotchner I need to see you." She waited for his nod then turned away and walked to her office. "Now agent." She threw over her shoulder when Hotch neglected to follow her.

"Answer later" he said quickly to Emily then followed the Section Chief to her office.


	16. Chapter 16

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

Chapter 16: Road Block

**February 2013 (Present Time)**

Hotch swallowed the lump in his throat as the Director and Section Chief took the seats across from him in the small office Strauss led him to. Any meeting with the Director always put him on edge, which for Hotch was not normal. He wasn't ever the nervous type especially at work. Confidence was a strength of his and it always had been but when the Director of the FBI comes calling anyone in their right mind would be somewhat fearful.

"Agent Hotchner it is good to see you again." the Director said leaning back in the chair.

Hotch took in the man's relaxed features as a good sign that this meeting was not a reprimand as he first thought. Not that he had done anything to gain a reprimand but with Strauss always on his case he never knew. "You too, sir" Hotch replied with a tight nod.

"Erin has told me your team has been at the top of their game the past few months." Strauss nodded in agreement. Hotch was slightly surprised at that omission. The woman doesn't compliment often so getting a good report to the Director from her was a nice boost for him.

"Yes we have sir." Hotch looked to Strauss for any inkling as to what the meeting was about but her blank face told him nothing. Hotch hated small talk, he liked getting straight to work.

"Let's just get down to business shall we?" The Director said bringing many files and folders from his briefcase to the table between them.

"I think that would be best sir."

"The Fly Team has requested your assistance again. I would like you to gather a task force as soon as possible. They just busted a sleeper cell in Afghanistan. You will leave in two days." the director told him with a stern voice then passed Hotch a folder as he walked out.

Hotch sat with his jaw dropped. The first thing that came to his mind was Jack. The last time he was sent overseas he was in Pakistan for 6 weeks before he was called back for the Doyle case. Those weeks nearly killed his son even with the capability of Skype keeping them in constant contact.

Looking up to Strauss he calmly asked "Is there any way out of this? I can't leave Jack again."

"I'm afraid not. The Director is set on sending you. Agent Morgan will take over your post until you return." She said with understanding "Aaron, I tried to get him to send Agent Conner but you're the best. I'm sorry. Let me know who you want on your team." Then she left.

Cooling himself Hotch remained in the office for a few minutes. His mind immediately went to Jack then to Emily, the only other person this could affect. Even though they weren't together she was still a part of him. Thinking about leaving right now made his heart ache. Gathering himself he walked out of the room and into his office without looking or talking to anyone.

-CM-CM-

Emily bit her lip reading over the report in front of her again in the past twenty minutes but near the middle she would lose concentration just like the previous times. Her mind was mulling over the simple question Hotch asked her. Simple as it may be she was having the most difficult time answering it.

Their date was perfect. As any date she went with him on in the past but she was still so hesitant. She wouldn't deny that she wanted this but at the same time she had other things to worry about. The baby sitting on her bladder was one of those things. The most precious thing in the world to her was not to him even though he said he wanted the baby she just didn't believe him. And with that her feelings don't matter much. Fact is he doesn't want another kid.

"Briefing room please" Hotch's voice interrupted her thoughts. She sighed as she gathered herself and readied her mind for another case, pushing back her personal life.

As everyone took their seats Emily watched Hotch pace the room anxiously. His face was blank to anyone else but she could tell he was stewing on something and he was nervous about it. That did not bode well for anyone. The saying 'If Mama ain't happy nobody's happy' applied to the team. If Hotch ain't happy nobody's happy. And that made for a grueling case.

"Sorry to take you away from your work but I have some things to discuss with you." Hotch started. Emily physically relaxed her shoulders, no case.

"As you know before Prentiss came back I was sent on an Investigative Task Force in Pakistan. The Director just informed me that I will be called out again. I know that this shakes up the team and I'm very sorry for that but Morgan will be taking over as unit chief till I return which could be months from now."

The room was silent for a moment everyone soaking in his words then Garcia spoke up. "Sir, why you? I mean you have Jack and everything."

"The Director was asked specifically for me. I was instructed to get a team together and leave in two days. I have already discussed this with Strauss so today will be my last day here. I want to spend time with Jack before I go." Hotch looked to Emily. He wasn't sure if he was happy or disappointed she showed no outward emotions about him leaving. Maybe it was best she wasn't affected, it won't be any harder on him leaving her for these months.

Emily took in his words and quickly compartmentalized her emotions. Schooling her face she smiled softly at him as he stared at her. She wouldn't let him know her heart was pounding out of her chest at the thought of him being overseas with the military. The task forces sent to places like Pakistan often investigated terrorist threats which she knew. Just the thought of Hotch being a part of that made her stomach roll.

After the meeting was dismissed Hotch stayed back waiting for a moment with Emily. "Hey" he smiled as much as he could.

"Is Jack going to stay with Jessica?" Emily asked keeping to neutral topics.

"Uh…yeah. I'm sure he won't be happy about it but…" he shrugged. "Emily…"

Emily placed a finger on his lips "its okay. We aren't going to make this more than it is. You are going to do a job then when you get back if we are still, I don't know, if we still want this" she motioned between the two of them "then we can take it from there." Half of her was somewhat relieved. Now she had more time to figure herself out. She needed that.

"But I don't want to just wait. It could be months. Emily, I love you and I want to be with you." He pleaded with her.

"Aaron" she took a breath pushing back her emotions. "We talked about this. We are not jumping into anything. You leaving doesn't change that. I still need time to work through my feelings." Her tone softened a bit and she slipped her hand into his. "This could be a good thing."

Hotch nodded slowly and bit his lip. "Or it could be the worst thing for us." He whispered dropping her hand and walking to the door.

Emily rolled her eyes "Hotch". For being a strong alpha male sometimes he could really doubt himself.

"No Em, I-I don't get it. Do you want…" his words were cut off by Emily's lips on his. His arms instinctively wrapped around her waist holding her to him as their lips and tongues danced together just like old times. The passion still explosive and mind numbing even after all the months apart.

Breaking the kiss slightly panting Emily opened her eyes to gaze into his dark chocolate eyes that were hazed over just a bit. "Of course I want you. But for me I need you to go do your job and come home safe then we can figure all this out."

Still slightly dizzy from the kiss Hotch just nodded and leaned back in for a softer kiss.

**A/N:** So I have always wondered why Hotch was in Pakistan in 7x01 before he came back to help with Doyle. They said it was an investigative task force so I took some liberties with my way of it so please take it as you will. And I know as soon as they start moving forward I throw a wrench in the mix but hey I did give you a present time kiss! Makes up for it?


	17. Chapter 17

Disclaimer: I own nothing. Any medical terms I got online so don't yell if it's wrong please!

Chapter Seventeen: Missed Call

**Early March 2013 (Present Time)**

**Afghanistan**

With the weather slowly starting to warm up Hotch hoped it would give some of his team members the spark they needed. Being away from home for more than two weeks has put a damper on the spirit and work ethic. When they first arrived the investigation went smoothly and everyone was happy but now they have hit many road blocks and it seems they might be staying longer than anyone wants. But it was their job so they put away their grievances and worked hard.

Hotch was having a hard time too. He missed Jack desperately even though they talked almost every day. Luckily he was able to get a call out for a few minutes to his son. Jack cried the first few days but now was adjusting to being with his aunt.

But Jack wasn't the only one he missed. Emily was on his mind constantly but he didn't want to bother her so he never called. He knew the team would be busy especially with being down two agents. Emily was stuck in Quantico so her help was limited.

Her voice ran through his mind often and he relied on that. It gave him peace in a place where others struggled. Lying in his cot still awake from a long day he rolled to his side and eyed the phone.

"Just do it man." Agent Robbins said from his cot a few feet away. The blonde haired agent was closer to Hotch's age than the rest of the men on his team and he had quickly become a good friend to Hotch and was privy to a few personal talks. Hotch didn't normally confide in people but this agent seemed to read him well. Having a family of his own they shared stories of their boys and bonded in a way the others hadn't.

He sat up late at night debating whether or not to call her almost every night. And every night he talked himself out of picking up the phone. "I don't know if I can." He whispered.

"Sure you can. Just pick up the phone and don't let her off until she gives you the answers you want."

"That simple?" the dark haired man asked eyeing the phone again.

"Hotchner, if you don't pick up that phone and call her I will and it will not be pretty." He threatened.

Arguing with himself again he finally decided to do it. With a look around to make sure everyone else besides Robbins was asleep he grabbed the phone and dialed the familiar number.

After a few rings the call went to voicemail. With a sigh of frustration he hung up without leaving a message. "No answer" he told the other man.

"You should have left a message. She probably doesn't have any way to get a call out here." the man said lying on his back.

"If she wanted to talk to me she can get a call out here." Hotch said getting back in his cot. "When I left she said she wanted time to think. I guess I should just give her that."

"Hotchner, don't let it get to you man. We will be back home soon."

-CM-CM-

**Washington DC**

Emily laughed as Morgan sat in the middle of the living room trying to read the instruction manual to the crib. It was his second try at getting the side hooked to the middle frame and from the hushed curses she heard coming from him she would say it isn't going too well. The phone ringing pulled her out of her fit of laughter but as she stood from the couch waves of pain rolled through her lower stomach making her cave in on herself and cry out in pain.

Morgan was at her side immediately "Em, you okay?"

Emily shook her head still not able to use her voice. Morgan wrapped his arm around her back and pulled her to the couch making her sit down.

"What happened?" his hands pushed back her fallen hair.

"I don't know." she whimpered out as another wave crashed over her.

"I'm going to call your doctor okay?" at her nod he grabbed her cell phone off the coffee table and made the call. As he rattled off his name and Emily's to the woman on the other line he sat next to Emily and rubbed at her back. "Have you been having any back pain or anything else this morning?" he asked softly.

"A little back pain but not much." Emily confessed.

He nodded to her and went back to the call. After a few more minutes and a few words of encouragement he ended the call and took Emily's hand in his. "Em, we need to get you to the hospital. Dr. Roberts is going to meet us there. She just wants to check you out and make sure everything's okay."

"Okay" she agreed grasping the edge of the couch and standing up.

-CM-CM-

The term they use for it is spontaneous preterm labor. That's what the doctor told Emily as they admitted her and stuck IV's in her arms. Luckily it wasn't too far along and they could slow it down with medication.

As another set of nurses came into her room armed with more supplies and her mother following behind them. "Emily, how are you honey? Agent Morgan called us a few minutes ago and I think your father might have run a few red lights to get here." Elizabeth Prentiss hugged her daughter as best she could after looking her over.

"They are trying to stop the labor because I'm just at 34 weeks." Emily whispered wincing as a nurse stuck another needle in her arm.

"How's the baby?" Elizabeth asked more to the doctor at the end of the bed than to Emily.

"She is doing okay. Her heart rate is a little on the slow side so we are going to keep an eye on that but she seems to be doing okay." Dr. Roberts explained. "If she at any time seems to be in any stress we will take action but right now we just need Emily to stay calm." She rubbed at Emily's arm with a smile.

"Thanks Dr. Roberts." The brunette in the bed said quietly.

A few hours later Emily's room was filled with most of her family. Garcia sat on the edge of the bed talking happily with JJ and Reid who were on the small couch next to the window. While Morgan and Rossi stood by the door as to be out of the way of the parade of nurses in and out of the room. Emily's parents were on her other side canceling the rest of their appointment for the day.

Emily loved them all very much but as she laid there letting the medicine do its job all she really wanted was Hotch. In the two weeks he had been gone she missed him more than she ever thought she would. The kiss they shared was seared in her mind and she held on to that but now it wasn't enough.

She wanted his words of courage and strength she knew he would give her, the feel on his strong hand in hers, and the love she would see in his eyes. Though she knew if she made that call he would come running she couldn't do that to him. He had a job to do and all she was doing was lying in a bed.

So she didn't make the call and before long Dr. Roberts came into the room with a serious expression on her face. It made Emily's nerves kick in. She quietly asked everyone to leave the room and they did quickly. Emily sat up as much as she could and held onto her Mother's hand.

"Mom stay" her words came out more forceful than she would have liked but her mother just kissed her head and stayed.

"Emily, we have been monitoring your baby very closely and her heart rate has not risen like I would have liked and now she is showing signs of stress so I think it would be best if we get her out now than wait any longer. We have already given her the steroids to help mature her lungs faster and from the ultrasound and test she looks well enough to be delivered. Now she is still premature so she will be kept in the NICU until she is healthy enough to go home. And I'm going to forewarn you, you may not be able to see her right away." The doctor said calmly.

Tears flowed freely down Emily's cheeks and her hand squeezed that of her mothers. "Are you sure this is best?"

"Yes it is. I wouldn't take her if I didn't think it was more harm for her to stay in the womb. She is just not doing well. I promise we will take care of her."

"Okay" she whispered wishing again to hear Hotch's voice telling her it would all be okay.

-CM-CM-

Rossi sat down next to Garcia in the waiting room with a sigh. "Hey, you okay sweetheart?" he noticed her biting her bottom lip.

"I think so but…do you think we should call Hotch?" Garcia had been thinking about it as soon as the doctor asked them to leave the room and now that they were delivering the baby she really wondered if she should.

"Are they back together?" Rossi grinned slightly thinking his advice to Aaron might have been good after all.

"Kind of. They went on a date and they were both happy but then he was shipped off so I'm not sure but I know Em would want him here." the blonde pleaded.

"Don't you think she would have said something if she did. Let's wait and see how she is afterwards and ask her before we get him on a plane back here." the older man said squeezing her knee and easing her worry.

**A/N:** So don't kill me yet! I wrote this chapter a dozen times. And every time I ended up changing the ending of the story completely but doing it this way will lengthen the story from what it was originally so I went with it. Anyways what do you think, should Garcia and Rossi call Hotch? Let me know!


	18. Chapter 18

**A/N**: Thank you so much for the reviews! Ya'll are awesome!

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

Chapter Eighteen: Lily

**Early March 2013**

**Washington DC**

A few hours after delivering Emily ran her finger down her daughter's small arm through the incubator. The tubes and needles didn't scare her but the fragile size of the baby did. 4 pounds 3 ounces and just at 18 inches long her daughter looked even smaller then she thought she would. Emily felt guilty that her body did this to her sweet girl but at the same time she was thankful to the doctors who were working nonstop to help.

The baby's hand flinched slightly bringing the first smile to Emily's tear stained face since being told she had to deliver her baby today. "I'm here sweet girl." She whispered watching in awe as her tiny eyes opened. "Do you think I should name you already?" she laughed softly. Taking in her daughter's face Emily smiled "I hope you like Lily. It was your great grandmother's name."

"Ms. Prentiss, I'm Doctor Amanda Holder. I'm taking over your daughter's care." the red head introduced herself.

"Nice to meet you. How is she doing?" she looked from doctor to baby and back again.

"She's strong but she needs a little help breathing so we have her on a ventilator. In a day or so if she starts breathing over it we will take it off. Now at the moment she doesn't have any infections which is very good but at the same time she can't nurse or drink from a bottle due to the ventilator so this tube here" she points to the tube in the baby's nose. "Is a feeding tube. I believe the nurses have already had you pumping so we can give her breast milk."

"Yes, they told me about the feeding tube. When the ventilator comes off and she is breathing well will I be able to nurse her?" Emily asked wanting to give her daughter the best she could and she knew breast feeding would not only give her the nutrition she needed but the bond a mother and baby share.

"Yes, though with her being born this young it might take her longer to grasp the concept of sucking so we will let you as often as she will do it but also keep the feeding tube to give her more. Now I don't want to lie to you and say she's going to be completely fine but she is doing very well considering." She explained.

Emily smiled weakly and nodded. "When can I hold her?" Just touching her baby and seeing the monitors showing she's alive helped but as she watched other parents taking their babies out and holding them she wanted that desperately.

"We do encourage kangaroo care but right now she is still very sensitive to all the machines so I would like to wait but I promise as soon as I can I will let you hold her."

After getting pushed back into her room Emily asked everyone to leave except Rossi. "I need you to get Hotch back." She said not wasting any time.

"I can't promise I can get through but I will try." He told her pulling out his cell.

"I need him Dave."

-CM-CM-

**Afghanistan**

"Hotchner" Aaron answered his cell wiping the sweat off his forehead.

"Aaron, its Dave." The familiar voice said over the phone. Hotch's brows shot up in surprise, a pleasant surprise but a surprise nonetheless. He hadn't heard from anyone since he left home except Jack.

"Dave, it's good to hear from you." Hotch said to his friend while walking away from base and all the noise from his rowdy team.

"You too Aaron but I'm afraid I need to tell you something that you're not going to like." his voice sounded rough and stressed.

He stopped in his place "What's wrong? Is it Jack? Emily?"

"Aaron, stay calm. Jack is fine. But Emily went into preterm labor today. The baby was under some stress so they got her out. She was born a few hours ago. She is very small just over 4 pounds but she's strong. She is in the NICU though."

Hotch's world seemed to end right there. As Rossi rattled off more and more information all he could see was Emily scared and alone in a hospital and her baby fighting for her life and neither of them had him. "Emily? How's Emily?" he asked.

"S-she's doing well. She's resting. They had to do a cesarean section so she's sore but they just brought her back from seeing the baby. She is only allowed a few minutes at a time so she can recover as well."

"Why didn't you call earlier? I would've been there!" he spun on his heel and headed right back to camp.

"Aaron, it was Emily's call to make. I know you would've come running but it was her call to make. But now that she is clear headed and in much better health she does want you here."

"I'll get the first plane out." He ended the call.

-CM-CM-

**Washington DC**

Nearly 15 hours later Hotch ran through the hospital doors and right up to the first nurse's station he could find. "Emily Prentiss? Where is she?" he panted out as best he could.

"Room 210. Are you a relative?" the dark headed nurse in pink scrubs asked looking the disheveled man up and down.

Hotch followed her eyes down his body and realized he forgot to change at the airport and was still in his cargo pants and green t-shirt that had stains all over it as well as a good layer of sand. "No I'm not but she is expecting me."

Before the nurse could say anything else JJ called his name from down the hall. "How is she? Can I see her?" he ran to the blonde.

"She's okay. She's sleeping but she is doing good. And Garcia is down by the NICU watching through the glass at the baby since they won't let anyone in except Emily. She got to see her for a few minutes but the baby is having a hard time breathing so she can't hold her yet." JJ told him as they met up with the rest of the team all piled into the small waiting room just down the hall from Emily's room.

Hotch greeted his friends and also her father who sat in the corner. "Mr. Prentiss, it's nice to see you again."

"Hotchner" the older man nodded tightly. "She's been asking for you." He stood up and waved the man towards his daughter's room. "Take it easy on her. She is still recovering from the surgery."

Hotch knocked softly on the door and pushed it open gently. Emily was lying in the bed with IV's running out of her arms and her face was somewhat paler than usual but to him she never looked more beautiful. Weeks away made him crave just the sight of her. He smiled at her mother, who stood to leave to give them some privacy and walked up to the woman in the bed.

"Emily" he whispered.

Her eyes opened slowly and after a few blinks they settled on him. "Aaron, you came?"

He chuckled slightly. "I guess you didn't want to wait till I was home to do all this." He joked trying to get a smile from her. "Sweetheart, how are you doing?" his hand ran through her dark hair pushing it away from her face so he could stare into her chocolate brown eyes.

"Couldn't wait. Maybe this was my way of getting you back. But I'm okay." She smiled reaching her hand out to touch him. "I need you to do something for me."

"Anything Em." He kissed her forehead.

She swallowed thickly knowing what she was going to ask was going to be a lot for him. "They are making me stay in this bed for a day or so but I need someone to be with my daughter. She's all alone and I need someone to be with her."

As tears brimmed her eyes Hotch bent down to her. "I'll go to her. Don't worry, she's not alone. Don't cry sweetheart." The baby still being a touchy subject for them both Hotch knew he needed to bite the bullet and do what needed to be done and right now he was needed in the NICU for a very sick baby.

"I know this is a lot for you and I'm sorry to ask but you're the only one I trust to be there if I'm not." She told him through her tears.

Hotch leaned down and kissed her softly. "I want to be here Emily. I told you already I want you and the baby."

"Lily, her name is Lily." She said wiping at her face.

"It's beautiful." He kissed her softly.

-CM-CM-

After getting doctor approval a few hours later and a rundown of the NICU rules Hotch was finally let in to see Lily. The NICU was a daunting place to see. It was quiet except for the sound of machines and the soft whispers of love and support by the four other parents in the room.

He was brought to Lily's incubator and told about the wires and tubes attached to the small baby. Hotch pulled up a stool and reached into the small bed she lay in, her tiny hand grasped his finger as soon as he touched her. He looked up at the monitor that sounded her heart rate. It was music to his ears. After learning that was a main reason for delivering her he was glad she was doing better.

His own heart had been racing since he walked in but slowed as her eyes opened slightly. Bright blues shone through bonding his soul to hers. At that very moment he knew she was his. Now he was determined for the tiny baby to leave the hospital with his last name.

He wiped his now wet cheeks on his sleeve as brought his other hand to her small head, lightly soothing her with his touch. "Hey sweet girl, are you doing okay? I know this all looks so scary but I'm here now. You don't have to be scared. Mommy and I are here baby." His whispers caught the attention of another parent a few feet away.

"When was she born?" the woman asked bring Hotch's attention away from Lily.

"Umm… yesterday." He said clearing his throat. "She's 7 weeks early but she's going to fight hard. Right Lily?" he smiled down at the baby, her eyes were closed again but he still sat in awe of her. The top of her head was covered by a tiny pink cap but he could still see some of the dark hair from underneath. He had no doubt she was going to look exactly like her mother.

"That's a beautiful name. This is Samuel. He was born almost 10 weeks early and in two days if all is still good he gets to go home." the boy was in her arms sucking down a bottle.

"That's great. How long has he been here? If you don't mind me asking?"

"Not at all. I find it comforting to talk to the other parents just to keep moral up." She shrugged. "He has been here for 5 weeks. He was doing fine after 4 weeks but he was still quite jaundice so they kept him longer. Is your wife coming down soon?"

Hotch shook his head. "No she's resting but she was here not too long ago. They won't let her come down for very long." he responded not bothering to correct her. He really didn't have the strength to explain what they were though he didn't understand it either. Too complicated he thought but what was not complicated was the baby holding on to him. He turned his attention back to her and blocked out everything else.


	19. Chapter 19

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

Chapter Nineteen: Bond

**Early March 2013 (Present Time)**

It felt unreal. Like the past 48 hours didn't happen but they did and Emily was trying hard to wrap her mind around that. It helped to have her parents by her side and even having her friends there to keep her company in the hours she was forced to stay in her bed.

She begged the nurses every chance she got to get out of the bed and see her daughter just a few floors below her but their answer was always the same 'You need to rest dear'. Ha! Emily thought how anyone could rest when their baby is fighting for her life was beyond her. Not that Lily was doing badly because she wasn't but she was still without her mother.

The few minutes she did get to spend with her daughter Emily savored. She memorized every face her baby made, every noise that startled her or every noise that soothed her. The calming tone of Hotch voice that put Emily at ease so many times did the same for Lily. So she made sure Hotch was talking to her at all times. On more than one occasion he told her he was out of things to talk about but he kept at it. He rarely left her side.

And when he wasn't with Lily he was with Emily. She knew he was exhausted but he never complained. He held her hand while she slept and told her about every moment with Lily. Emily owed him everything for being there. They had yet to really talk about anything pertaining to them mainly because all their attention was on Lily and partly because Emily feared if she brought it up they would just end up fighting. She loved him for sure and wanted to be with him but now she was a mother to a beautiful daughter who was not his. He told her before he wanted both of them but all Emily could think was how long would it take for Hotch to resent Lily for not being his.

"Report time" Hotch's smiling face peeked in the door of Emily's room breaking her spell of thoughts.

Emily scooted up on the bed and grinned at him. "Hey, how is she?" she watched in amusement as he entered the room with arms full of bags and Garcia hot on his heels with a few bags of her own.

"Where do you…" he started to ask the blonde but followed her to the couch and dropped the bags. Turning back to Emily he smiled showing off his dimples. "Good her jaundice levels have gone down and Dr. Holder said after her afternoon check you can hold her."

"What?" Emily choked out. After the talk with the doctor Emily didn't think she would get to hold Lily for a few days.

"She said you get to hold her today." He walked to her and kissed her forehead.

"What about all the tubes and stuff? I don't want to hurt her and she's still on the vent. What if I move her and it hurts her?" she was excited to hold her baby but with the machines surrounding the girl Emily was a bit nervous. Reid had made a point to brush up on his knowledge of all things preemie so for the past day she had heard nonstop about things that could go wrong. For Christmas she plans on getting him a girlfriend maybe that will shut him up she mused.

"You won't hurt her." he told her confidently.

Emily shrugged still not sure and turned her attention to the blonde who was in the middle of pulling things out of the bags brought in and mumbling to herself. "Garcia, what are you doing?" she raised a curious eye brow.

"Well my wonderful Mama, you just couldn't wait for your baby shower so I brought your baby shower to you. But you do have to wait until the rest of the crew gets here." Garcia happily clapped her hands.

Emily frowned. She thought that was an upside to all this. She hated baby showers well not hated them but didn't see the point. Trying to figure out what kind of chocolate candy is melted in the diaper is just plain gross. And has anyone really smelt baby food before. She could live without that. Of course there were presents but she honestly didn't need anything else. Her apartment was full of everything her daughter would need thanks to her over excited Mother.

Then there was the fact that actually having the baby shower would just make her want to see her baby which she wasn't able to do. So the baby shower was a no go in her book.

Hotch squeezed Emily's hand noticing the unhappy look on her face. "I think it will be fun."

Emily pulled her hand away as if she was burned. "You have never been to one and you don't get a say in it. I'm the one laid up in a damn hospital bed being reminded that I have a baby but don't get to see her." she spat at him. It was more forceful than she was going for but it got her point across.

He sat next to her on the bed and leaned in close so she was only focusing on him. "You do get to see her and soon the doctor will release you and you can be with her all the time. But right now you are going to relax and let your friends have fun. Besides you get to hold her today." his voice was calm even though inside his heart was breaking for her. It was hard seeing her upset but all he could do was keep her spirits up about the good she still had to look forward to.

"Em, if you don't…" Garcia was cut off by Emily shaking her head and a flood of tears running down her face.

"No, I'm sorry. I just…" she sobbed. _Bitch. I'm a bitch!_ She berated herself.

"You just miss her. I'm sorry honey. I honestly wasn't thinking. We can do this when you leave the hospital if you want." Garcia offered.

Hotch wiped away Emily's tears and murmured "I think that might be best. Thanks though Garcia." The blonde nodded and gathered her bags and quickly left the room. "Sweetheart, it's okay." He soothed her running his hands through her hair.

"It's not. I hate this. I'm not someone who gets upset like this and I just want to hold my baby and everyone keeps telling me to rest. I don't need rest! I need my daughter!" she vented her hormones and medications were coursing through her body bringing out a whole other side to her. One that just made Hotch smile and roll his eyes.

"I know you do." He wrapped his arms around her rocking back and forth gently until her tears stopped and her breathing returned to normal.

-CM-CM-

After afternoon rounds in the NICU Emily was wheeled in a wheelchair, much to her discouragement, to Lily's station. Dr. Holder was in the middle of explaining to Hotch how to help lift the baby and place her on Emily's chest.

"Is she doing okay?" Emily asked bringing their attention to her.

"Yes she is. Are you ready to hold her?" the doctor asked lifting the top half of the incubator so they could get to Lily.

"Honestly I'm nervous but I really want to hold her." she moved her chair right up to her usual spot so she could talk to Lily and lightly run her fingers over her little body. "Hello pretty girl. Mommy's here" she whispered moving her hand inside the bed. Lily liked being touched and normally she would wrap her fingers around Emily or Hotch's finger. It melted their heart every time.

"Don't be nervous although everyone is the first time but she is going to be fine." The red head assured her. "You're going to do the kangaroo hold which is skin to skin. So I'm going to put up this curtain so it's more private and Aaron here is going to help move you to the rocking chair. I figured you would want more time alone with her. Babies thrive doing this and I think it is really going to help Miss Lily control her breathing and help get the ventilator off sooner."

Emily happily moved to the rocking chair. If they were offering more time than she would gladly take it. She watched anxiously as Hotch and Dr. Holder maneuvered machines and wires around Lily as they lifted her from the bed and placed her on Emily's bare chest. The first touch of her daughter on her chest made her heart swell with love and pride. It was unlike anything she had ever felt before. She lightly ran her hands across the infant's back as Hotch reached over for a small blanket. Tears sprang in her eyes but she didn't shed them because crying would only make her take her eyes off the bright blues of her baby.

"You okay?" Hotch whispered draping the blanket over the baby and the doctor turned to check Lily's vitals on the screens.

Emily nodded softly. She couldn't speak yet afraid if she did it would upset Lily. Instead she lowered her chin and placed a gentle kiss to the baby's head. Closing her eyes she savored that moment. It was the first time she was able to kiss her daughter.

Hotch leaned back in his chair next to Emily and watched as mother and daughter bonded. It was utterly beautiful to see them together and he prayed with everything he had he would get to see it for the rest of his life.

Lily's eyes soon closed falling asleep happy and content in her mother's arms.

A/N: Thank you for all the reviews and kind words. They mean a lot! Have some Jack action coming up in the next chapter!


	20. Chapter 20

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

Chapter Twenty: Jack and Decorating

72 hours after Lily was born Emily was finally released from the hospital. But getting released and leaving were two very different things. Her doctor told her to go home and get some rest then come back to visit Lily but Emily had other plans.

Morgan helped pack up all her belongings and stored them away in his car while Emily took the elevator to Lily's floor. Walking up to the door she quickly washed her hands and dawned a hospital gown then made her way to her daughter's station. "Morning Molly." Emily smiled at the mother of the baby next to Lily. "How's Sam?"

"Doing great, going home today." Molly smiled back rocking her son in her arms. Since Lily was born Emily had met the other parents to the four other infants in the NICU they were very supportive which Emily needed.

"That's great." Emily said just a bit jealously sliding through her lips.

Frowning slightly at the empty bed Emily looked behind the curtain and smiled. Hotch was lying back in the chair with a small bundle on his bare chest, both were fast asleep. She didn't realize how much she missed seeing Hotch like that. Calm and content he didn't have any worries while he slept. Looking closer Emily noticed Lily's hand firmly holding one of his fingers and tried to contain her light giggle but it was enough to wake Hotch.

"Hey" he mumbled opening his sleepy eyes.

"Hey, sorry to wake you up. How long have you two been out?" she asked bending down to lightly kiss Lily's head. The wonderful baby smell filled her senses as she gave her baby a longing look. It had been a few hours since she last saw Lily and in her book it was a few hours too long.

"Umm…an hour or so." He answered shaking out the cob webs in his sleep deprived head. "Why are you here? Didn't Dr. Roberts send you home and Morgan was going to take you." He raised an eye brow.

Emily shook off his stare "Whatever. I'm not leaving until she does. End of story." She told him sternly.

Hotch rolled his eyes but dropped the conversation so instead he carefully stood up with Lily held close to his chest and let Emily take his chair. She quickly sat and took her baby from him.

"Hello sweet girl. Have you been good?" she rubbed her infant's back gently.

"She got a few test earlier and Julie said she would let us know when they get the results." Hotch told her. The nurses were great in keeping Emily and himself informed even though half the time they had no clue what the nurses were talking about.

"Maybe this vent can come off soon." She said playing with Lily's tiny fingers.

"Not yet." Dr. Holder walked in catching Emily's last comment. "She's still struggling but she is still clear of all infections so that is so good news." She said checking over the chart and then moved to Lily. "Come here baby girl, let's get you checked out." She gently lifted Lily from Emily's arms much to the mother's sour look.

"Have you talked to Jack today?" Emily asked as she and Hotch followed the doctor out to Lily's incubator. Soon after Hotch arrived back he told his son he was at the hospital with Emily. Jack immediately wanted to go see them but Hotch wanted to wait and see if there would be any other complications with the baby.

"Yeah, he said he made Lily a sign for her station. Jessica is bringing him up here after school so I can see him." he said with a smile. He loved being with Lily and Emily but he missed his son desperately.

"Aaron I'm released now so why don't you go home tonight with him. I know you miss him and now you don't have to be here all the time." Emily told him.

Hotch shook his head "I'm not going home. If Lily is here then so am I."

Emily rolled her eyes. "Fine" she huffed moving past him and to her daughter. "How you doing Lily?" she said giving Lily a loving smile.

"Well Mommy she seems to be doing good. I thought she would have been breathing over the vent by now but I guess she just wants to take her time." The doctor said moving so Emily could get to her. "We tested for respiratory infections but she's all clear. And her jaundice levels are way down. The lights did great for her." Over the night Lily was placed under a blue light that helped her body eliminate bilirubin which is the cause of jaundice. Hotch had stayed at her side the whole time even though she was sleeping.

"Did you hear that big girl? You are doing so good." Emily cooed at the baby.

-CM-CM-

Hotch watched from the hospital entrance as Jessica pulled her car into the parking lot and parked. Seconds later Jack stepped out of the back seat and took the offered hand of his aunt. The sight of his son warmed his heart and made a bright smile tug at his lips.

"Daddy!" Jack yelled running to him pulling his aunt right along. When he got close enough Jack dropped Jessica's hand and flew at his father with his poster for Lily in his hands.

Hotch laughed catching him and holding on tight. "I missed you so much buddy." He told the boy.

"Missed you too dad." Jack smiled pulling back to look at Hotch. "Daddy we brought your clothes." He pointed to Jessica with a duffle in her hands.

"Hey Jess, thanks for bringing him up here and for the clothes. I just haven't had time to go home yet." he told the blonde as she reached them.

"Not a problem. How's Emily?" she asked walking at his side into the hospital. Hotch was surprised how well the two women got along while he was dating Emily.

"She's good. Got released today but won't actually leave the place." He sighed.

"Did you expect her to? I know I wouldn't." Jessica told him passing him the duffle and taking Jack from him as they stopped by the restroom door.

"I guess not. Hey buddy I'm going to go change real fast then we can go show Emily and Lily your poster."

After a fresh change of clothes he led them to a window that showed most of the NICU. Lily's bed was at the end of the row so Jack got a good view of her. "Wow daddy, she is really small." his eyes went wide.

"Yep, she is. And that tube in her mouth helps her breath. Hopefully she can get it out soon." Hotch said waving for Emily to come out. She was sitting at Lily's side reading one of the books Garcia had brought for Lily. The doctors said reading and talking to the babies help sooth them so Emily and Hotch both took to reading stories to her.

"Daddy does it hurt her? Tell them to take it out if it hurts. Maybe Lily doesn't like needles, I don't." Jack told his father in his serious Hotchner tone.

"It doesn't hurt Jack. All the things on her are helping her grow and get healthy so she can go home." Hotch explained. "Look who is right there." He changed the subject hoping his son wouldn't be too upset about the machines attached to Lily.

Emily quickly left the Lily's side and was met by Jack's waiting arms. "Emily!" he smiled as she bent down to kiss him.

"Hey Jack, how are you sweetie?" she asked brushing his hair from his face.

"I'm fine. I brought this for Lily. Can you give it to here?" he held up a white poster board with Lily's name in purple and pictures of him and his dad and Emily and even a few of the team glued to it. Glitter littered the poster but it made Emily's eyes mist.

"That is so sweet of you. She is going to love it." She pulled him into a hug. "Thank you" she kissed his cheek. "Hey Jess" she looked up wiping her face.

"She's beautiful Emily." The blonde told her looking at the infant through the window.

"Thanks." She smiled.

They spent the next few minutes talking about Lily but eventually Jack steered the conversation to his school and friends. Emily and Hotch were both thankful to have a few minutes with the happy boy. Constantly talking about medical problems and what to do if something happens they happily forgot their problems and focused on Jack indulging in his silly jokes and games.

By the time Jessica and Jack needed to leave Hotch's smile had disappeared and his frown took residence on his face. Emily immediately noticed "Hey why don't you go have dinner with Jack?" she encouraged. She really wanted him to have so time with the boy and it was a nice way of getting him some down time away from the NICU.

"Yeah Daddy, come with us!" Jack clapped.

Hotch shot Emily a glare but ultimately caved. "Okay buddy. Do you want me to get you anything while I'm out?" he asked the brunette that was smiling ear to ear.

"Nope, just have fun."

-CM-CM-

Morgan growled again throwing the screw driver down and tossing his hands in the air. "I hate cribs!" he yelled. "I'm never having kids."

Garcia laughed at the man and turned to JJ."So are you sure she won't mind us putting together the room? She got really upset about the baby shower thing."

"I already talked to Hotch and he said it needed to be done. Don't worry Garcia." JJ calmed the blonde and put the finishing touches on the changing table. "There done."

"JJ, I really don't understand this." Reid said walking into the room with wall border sticking to his hands.

Both women busted out laughing at the genius as Morgan got up to help. "Here kid, this side goes on the wall not your body." He said hiding his smile and pointing with emphasis.

"I know that Morgan." Reid rolled his eyes and went back into the nursery ignoring the laughs of his colleagues.

"JJ, you are going to have to fix that crib yourself. If I so much as look at it again I might just break it and go buy one that is already put together." Morgan sat on the couch and grabbed a slice of pizza.

"You boys are useless." JJ groaned taking Morgan's seat at the crib. After twenty minutes or so she had the crib together and a very smug smile to go with it. "So…" she winked at the dark man as he muttered some choice words.

"Border is up and everything is in its place." Dave said coming into the living room. "Nice work guys." He said looking over the crib.

"Thanks Rossi." JJ kept her satisfied smile on her face as Morgan and Garcia started cleaning up.

"Rossi" Dave laughed answering his ringing phone watching JJ give Morgan hell.

"Hey Dave I need you to do me a favor. It's for Emily." Hotch said.

A/N: Hmmm, what is Hotch up to? Reviewer Kim I just wanted to let you know I totally agree and their time is definitely coming. And thank you everyone for reviewing. Ya'll are great!


	21. Chapter 21

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

Chapter Twenty One: Getting Away

**March 2013 (Present Time)**

Emily looked up at the window as Garcia and JJ tapped on it lightly. She smiled at her friends as they seemed to melt looking at Lily asleep in her bed. She wished they could come in but Lily was still too little and some of the other babies were still sick so visitor time was only for families. Hotch was an exception.

Carefully closing the incubator Emily made her way out of the NICU and into the hall with the blonde women. "Hey guys" she embraced them both with a hug.

"How is my little angel tonight?" Garcia held Emily's hand still gawking at the baby.

"She's good. What are you doing here? Not that I'm not happy to see you but Morgan said you got a case." Everyone had been by everyday but after Morgan said they had a case she figured they would be gone for a few days.

"We do but it's not our normal case. We have a special case but we need you for it." JJ smiled at Garcia sharing an evil look.

Emily tried to back away but Garcia still had her hand. "No, whatever this is no. I'm not leaving this hospital so whatever you have cooked up no." she eyed the blondes but neither showed surrender in the near future.

Garcia pulled at Emily's arm and much to Emily's resistance managed to pull her to the restroom a few feet away. "Now Gumdrop you have been in this place for days and frankly you need out. And I know you don't want to leave that precious baby but luckily we found someone who can be with her so you can have some fun." as Emily opened her mouth to protest JJ placed her hand in the air.

"No, you are leaving even if we have to carry you. Now put this on and please run a brush through your hair." JJ told the brunette with a look of disgust and handed her a black dress on a hanger and a bag with hair supplies and make up. "There are no windows or other exits so please don't take too long. We will be right outside."

After the blondes made their exit Emily looked at herself in the mirror hanging over the row of sinks. "Man you really do look bad." She ran her hands through her unruly locks. Sighing softly she look at the dress. It was loose and flowed down nicely, she just hoped it didn't mess with the healing scar on her belly too much. "This is gonna suck!" she groaned stomping into the empty stall.

Outside the restroom JJ and Garcia had their noses pressed up against the glass with big smiles on their faces pointing at the babies. "Ms. Garcia?" a confident voice came from behind them.

"Oh, Mrs. Prentiss." They both turned to the woman. "So glad you could do this for us, I mean Emily." Garcia corrected. Soon after Hotch's call for help the group decided to call the ambassador to come be with Lily while Emily was away. And luckily the woman agreed. They just left out the part of her daughter being forced into it.

"Where's Emily?" the older woman asked looking around for the missing brunette.

"Uh…she's in the restroom getting ready. Here is Lily though." JJ said bringing her attention to the infant in the window.

"She is darling. Don't you think?" Elizabeth ran her eyes over the baby.

"She is." They both agreed now all three of them gawking.

A throat cleared behind them taking their attention away from the baby and onto the brunette. "So how do I look?" she asked. "Mom what are you doing here?" she asked but had a feeling she knew what the ambassador was doing there.

"Great!" Garcia squealed. "Now let's get you going." She tried moving Emily but she wasn't going.

"I'm sitting with Lily while you're out. Didn't you know?" she asked eyeing Garcia.

The blonde huffed "Okay, yes your mother is here to sit with Baby Girl and no," she turned to the ambassador "Em didn't know because this was supposed to be a surprise."

The older woman smiled "Haven't left the hospital dear?" she chuckled softly as her daughter huff and rolled her eyes.

"No"

"Well now is the time I'm here to see my granddaughter and you are going out. Have a nice time." Elizabeth followed JJ over to the nurse's station to get all signed in. Hotch had already okayed everything with the nurses so Emily's mother could be let in.

"Come with me please we don't have much time." Garcia pushed Emily along.

-CM-CM-

Hotch looked in the mirror one last time checking his tie. "You look good. Don't be nervous." Dave said turning the man to help with the tie. "Everything is going to be fine."

"I know but…don't you think this a little much?" he said looking around at the hotel room Dave paid for. It was bigger than his apartment with a kitchen and three bedrooms. Then his eyes landed on the dining table set for two. Candles lit the room nicely and the girls even placed flowers throughout the room. Even though he asked for help he didn't expect this.

"Aaron, do you want to woo her or not?" the Italian asked with a questioning brow.

Hotch chuckled "I'm not sure I want to woo her but I do want to take her mind off Lily. She's been stuck in that room for a week. It's time she gets out but… we are pizza and a movie kind of people."

At the knock at the door Dave smiled and went to get it. "Too late" he sang. Hotch looked around one last time and quickly grabbed a rose lying on the side table. Steeling his breath he nodded for Dave to open the door.

Emily frowned at seeing Dave opening the door. She pretty much figured it was Hotch who set it all up but no there was Dave. "Uh…hi." She said.

"Oh don't worry Em, I'm not staying. Your prince is in there." He kissed her cheek and walked down the hall.

Emily shook her head and took a step inside. "Wow" her eyes went wide taking in the room. When they finally landed on Hotch she smiled. He always looked good in a suit, she sighed. "Hey"

"Hey" he grinned. "You look beautiful."

"Thanks I guess. I was pretty rudely told I was not lookin so good at the hospital. You know you could have said something instead of sending the twisted sisters after me." She joked walking towards him.

"Yeah sorry about that. Not all of this was me." He gesture to the room itself.

"I guessed that." She laughed. "So how long am I barred from the hospital?"

Hotch reached for her hand and she happily gave it. "Just tonight. Your mother and father are taking a shift each with Lily. I just thought you need time to let your mind rest and relax. Lily is fine and…" he moved her to the window. "We are right across the street from the hospital so if anything does happen we're here."

She smiled up at him. Although she didn't want to be away she was glad he was with her. "Okay but at first light we are going back." She told him sternly then turned back to the room. "It's beautiful"

"It is but not really us. I don't know why I gave the rains over to Dave but he just wanted us to have a good time." Hotch walked to the table and pulled out her chair. "Hungry?"

"Yes, the cafeteria is nasty." She told him as a shiver went through her thinking about the food she had consumed the past few days. At least the pudding was good.

He chuckled and went about preparing their meal. Not only did Dave get them a nice room but he also made them his famous lasagna. They ate in comfortable conversation but both ended up bring Lily and medical issues into it. It was inevitable they both had her on their minds.

After a small clean up they moved to the couch. "Getting tired?" Hotch asked after her second yawn.

She nodded slightly. It had been a long day and an even longer week. Though she ached to see her daughter all she really wanted to do was pass out. Sleeping at the hospital didn't lend its way to a peaceful rest. Monitors beeped constantly and babies cried nonstop.

He wrapped an arm around her and pulled her in close. "I'm glad you came." He whispered laying his head on hers.

"Me too. It was nice to get away." A smile crossed her lips. "Thank you" she whispered.

"For what?" he questioned leaning back on the couch and pulling her back with him.

"For everything, you're amazing." She said snuggling into his warmth. A calming wave settled over her in a matter of seconds when his arms wrapped around her. "You are great with Lily and you're great with me."

Hotch chuckled. "I'm not doing anything. I told you before I left that I love you. That means doing whatever you need me to do."

Emily held his gaze for a moment "I love you too but…" she lingered biting her lip.

He snapped up quickly. She wasn't going to pull away from him again. "You are going to have to get over whatever is holding you back. I'm not trying to push you into this but for heaven's sake Emily I love you and you love me. That's all there is to it. I will apologize for the rest of my life for hurting you but I will not apologize for protecting you. I will do anything for you. Anything."

"But it's not just me anymore Aaron." She countered sitting up.

"You think I don't know that. I've been in that room falling in love with that little girl for a week." he got off the couch. Pacing was the only thing keeping his temper down. He was tired of her pulling away just as they were getting somewhere.

"I know that and you don't know how much that means to me but…" she stopped dropping his gaze. Everything happened so fast the she didn't have the time to stop and think about why she really was holding back from him. It wasn't that he broke her heart though she hated that but she finally understood why he did it and forgave him. But the real reason she was hold back was her daughter. That sweet precious baby was everything to her but she wasn't Hotch's.

"But what Emily?" he hooked a finger under her chin bring her eyes back to his.

Emily bit her lip again. "She's not yours." She said so softly he barely heard it.

Hotch smiled gently his face softening "Yes she is. She may not be my blood but she is my heart." at his words Emily stared at him. He leaned down to her "I love Lily just like I love Jack and I will for the rest of my life. You love Jack even though he isn't yours." He pressed his lips together and took her hands in his. "I want to spend the rest of my life with you by my side. I want to spend the rest of my life watching Jack and Lily and any other baby you want, grow up and have families of their own. I don't know how else to tell you that I want this."

Emily tears flooded her face as she captured his lips with hers. The kiss was slow and passionate each pouring every ounce of love they had for the other into it. As Emily slowly pulled away she opened her eyes to his dark ones staring right back "I want that too. I want you and our kids."

Hotch's face brightened as he pulled her into another kiss.

**A/N**: Yay! Happy Hotly! Let me know what you think!


	22. Chapter 22

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

Chapter Twenty Two: Home

**Late March 2013 (Present Time)**

It was the day. The day Emily wished for since seeing Lily the very first time. It was the day Lily got off the ventilator. It wasn't her first step or her first word but getting off the vent was a day closer to getting home. The proud mother would take that over her first step any day of the week and twice on Sunday. The doctors had been slowly weaning Lily off the ventilator for the past few days and now she was successfully breathing on her own.

Walking into the NICU that morning was better than every other morning. She passed by other parents with a smile but all her attention was on the small little girl with a pink hat on. Her nerves were there but mostly she was just thrilled to hold Lily without the machine. "Good morning sweet girl." She cooed as blue eyes stared back at her. "You ready for today? Mommy is."

"I think she is too." Lily's doctor said coming up behind Emily. "Everything looks good. Let's get this off her. Now be prepared for a very upset baby."

Emily nodded stepping back as Hotch strolled in and took his place at her side. "She's taking it off." She whispered to him as a few nurses help the doctor. Soon a small cry was heard and Emily's eyes flooded with tears. Most were from happiness just to hear her baby and some were because Lily was upset. "Is she okay?" she asked looking over the doctor's shoulder.

"She's perfect. Come hold her Mommy." The woman answered.

Emily stepped up and peered in the bed. Lily lay on her back tears leaking down her eyes and her small fists waving in the air as another cry filled the room. "Oh baby, it's okay. Mommy's here." she told her baby picking her up and holding her close. Rocking from side to side she made her way to the rocking chair and sat down bringing Lily to her chest. That was the infant's favorite position.

"We are going to monitor her closely but if all is good tomorrow you can try nursing." Dr. Holder said finishing up her chart.

"That sounds perfect." Emily smiled down at her baby who was slowly falling asleep.

-CM-CM-

Walking into her apartment Emily had to admit it was getting easier leaving the hospital. She didn't understand why but it was. Did it make her a bad mother she wasn't sure but now that Lily was no longer under strict monitoring she felt if she left everything was going to be fine. She didn't stay gone long but a few hours for a shower and a good meal gave her the energy she needed to be there for her baby.

She made her way to the kitchen with Hotch close behind locking up the door. "What are you hungry for?" she asked looking over her nearly empty cabinets.

"Why don't you go rest for a while and I will make us up something." He nuzzled at her exposed neck. A toll was taking over both of them but neither complained. Emily felt guilty Hotch was in the same boat as her but even if she told him to go home he wouldn't. He was as attached to Lily as she was.

"Okay but not too long." She agreed giving him a kiss then making her way to her bedroom but a light from the nursery caught her eye.

Pushing open the door her breath caught in her throat. The walls were painted pale green with a wall border with colorful flowers. The crib sat against the far wall with a pink canopy draping just right and a dresser and changing table sat across from the crib and a rocking chair in the corner. Small stuffed animals and picture frames littered the room but on the wall above the dresser hung the photo Hotch took the first day Emily held Lily. Both were asleep but it was beautiful. Emily's eyes misted as she reached up to touch the picture.

Hotch followed as Emily went into the room. He stayed silent letting her take it all in. the picture she touched he had JJ put up. They took tons of pictures but that one was the most beautiful of his girls. Emily didn't even know he took it but by the look on her face she figured it out.

"Aaron" she breathed out after feeling his presence at the door. "How? You…I mean it's…"

"I didn't do much. Garcia and JJ had it under control so I let them go at it. But I think it turned out pretty good." he smiled taking her hand in his.

"It's beautiful." She leaned into him resting her head on his shoulder. "I can't wait until she's home." she admitted freely.

"That it is." He agreed but his eyes weren't on the room but on the picture on the wall.

-CM-CM-

**Early April 2013 (Present Time)**

"How are we doing this morning?" Dr. Holder asked walking over to Lily's station.

"Wonderful. Huh baby girl?" Emily smiled as Lily nursed happily. It was hard at first for Lily to start nursing but after a few tries and some coaching for Emily the baby went at it like a pro and Emily relished in the bonding time. To see her baby happy and healthy send warmth to her heart.

"How old is Miss Lily today?" the doctor asked arching an eye brow.

"Uh… twenty two days." Emily was thoroughly confused. Why didn't her doctor know how old she was?

"Well I think twenty two days is just too long for her to be here." she grinned looking at her chart.

As Emily took in her words a smile graced her face. "Really? She can go home?"

"Emily she is doing great. She's gained weight and is taking to nursing very well. Take her home." the red head said. "She just has to pass the car seat test and she can go."

The brunette laughed in joy. Finally she got to take her baby home. Hours later Emily watched as Hotch strapped Lily and her car seat in the back of his SUV. "Careful" she raised a hand to her mouth.

Hotch sighed. "Em, I do have a kid. I've done this before. Lily is fine." But as he said that he couldn't think that Jack hadn't been in an infant car seat in years and now he just had a booster seat.

"I know but she's just so small and you're moving it around a lot." Her nerves were all over the place since the doctor said to take the baby home. She figured all mothers go through it but she couldn't stop worrying over every little thing that could happen while they were on the way to her apartment.

After Hotch secured the seat he took Emily's face in his hands. "Sweetheart, calm down. Lily is fine. Let's go home."

Emily sat in the back with Lily while Hotch drove but really he was just following his back seat driver. He rolled his eyes as she told him to slow down once again but instead of saying anything to her he did as she said.

Getting Lily into the apartment went a little smoother than the car ride but Emily was still a wreck. She outweighed the chances of getting stuck in the elevator to the jostling of the baby in the stairs or falling down them. When they reached the door she happily told Lily about her new home and went on to give a tour of the apartment while Hotch put away the boxes from the hospital full of toys and clothes.

Walking into Emily's bedroom he stopped in his tracks. Emily swayed back and forth with Lily wrapped in her arms. A beautiful sight but what caught his attention was Emily singing softly. Admittedly she wasn't a great singer but as she sang to his baby it was the most beautiful song ever heard.

"_Baby mine, don't you cry  
>Baby mine, dry your eyes<br>Rest your head close to my heart  
>Never to part, baby of mine."<em>

Pulling Hotch from her singing his phone buzzed in his pocket. Pulling it out and seeing Rossi's name he ignored the call and put his phone away.

_"Little one when you play_  
><em>Don't you mind what you say<em>  
><em>Let those eyes sparkle and shine<em>  
><em>Never a tear, baby of mine.<em>

_If they knew sweet little you  
>They'd end up loving you too<br>All those same people who scold you  
>What they'd give just for<br>The chance to hold you._

_From your head to your toes_  
><em>You're not much, goodness knows<em>  
><em>But you're so precious to me<em>

_Cute as can be, baby of mine"_

As the song ended he stepped up behind her and wrapped his arms around them both. "I love you" he whispered.

Emily turned into him and kissed his cheek "I love you too."

A/N: So I had the hardest time picking a lullaby for Emily to sing so I asked my two year old what 'nite-nite' song was her favorite and she picked 'Baby Mine' from Dumbo. But I think it works.


	23. Chapter 23

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

Chapter Twenty Three: Breakfast and Garcia

**Early April 2013 (Present Time)**

Emily sighed happily walking around her bedroom the next morning. Being home with Lily was an amazing feeling. After all the worries and struggle she finally felt like her family was complete and Lily being home was a major step in that. Now the mess that came with the infant, she bent down to pick up a discarded onesie, not so much an amazing feeling but she shrugged thinking about it, she'd take it.

As Emily walked out of her bedroom Hotch's phone buzzed on the dresser. Picking it up and seeing Rossi's name she gladly answered. "Hey Dave" she said picking up the forth burp towel she found from the bed to the door.

"Hey Em, how was the first night?" Dave asked.

"It was good actually. I thought I would be up all night but Lily did really well. She woke up about every two hours to eat but she went back to sleep right after." She told him making her way to the laundry room and tossing in the items she picked up to start another load. Most of the night was spent in her room with Hotch running back and forth getting anything they forgot so things were thrown all around between the both of them.

"That's great. Was Aaron any help?" he chuckled.

"Yes he was." She smiled turning the corner and peaking into the nursery where Hotch was busy getting Lily changed and dressed for the day. Hotch had been amazing taking Lily after she nursed so Emily could get a head start on sleeping and letting Emily sleep in when Lily didn't go back to sleep after eating early in the morning.

"Well I'm glad everything is going well. Can I speak with him?"

"Of course" she handed the phone to Hotch and took over at the changing table. "Hello baby girl. Are you being good?" she finished buttoning the onesie and picked Lily up cradling her in her arms. She glanced at Hotch who was standing in the hallway with his free hand running over his face and talking quietly.

Brushing it off she left the room and made a b-line to the kitchen for some breakfast. Placing Lily in the bouncer seat and strapping her in Emily reached into the fridge for eggs and a few other items.

"I can't! End of story!" Hotch yelled in the hall making Emily jump slightly. Glancing at Lily and seeing she was content looking around the room she took a few steps towards the hall but didn't go to him. She winced as he threw the phone and leaned against the wall.

"Are you okay?" her voice was soft. She was concerned why he was upset but she really wanted him to calm down so he wouldn't scare the baby.

Hotch's face snapped up and immediately he regretted letting things get to him. "I'm sorry. I-I just…"

Emily walked to him and took his face in her hands. "What's wrong? Talk to me."

Staring into her chocolate eyes he took a breath. "When I came back from Afghanistan I took vacation time to stay with Lily but now it is out and the Director wants to see me. And Strauss is pissed because I kept ignoring her calls so she sent Dave after me. I just know what the Director is going to say and I can't leave you. I can't go back."

Emily's heart ached just think he would be away again but she also knew it was his job. "When do you have to meet with the Director?"

"Tomorrow" he shrugged.

"Okay so here is what we are going to do. We are going to go eat breakfast then Jack is going to come over and we are going to spend the day loving our kids and…"

"Emily" he interrupted her. He would much rather mope around.

"No Aaron. We are not going to think about you leaving until we know for sure. So we are going to have a good day and tomorrow we can deal with what needs to be done." She told him softly.

When a small cry came from the kitchen she kissed him quickly and went to her baby. Hotch stayed where he was in complete awe of her. The way she handled things like that had always amazed him. Whether it was her compartmentalization skills or her being the strong independent woman he fell in love with he didn't know but he envied her. He only wished he could push back his worries and focus on his family.

"Aaron, breakfast will not cook itself." Emily called from the kitchen putting half hearted smile on his face and an eye roll.

"No it won't but didn't we agree you were cooking and I was on baby duty?" he asked emerging from the hall. He gently picked up Lily and winked at Emily. Before getting out of bed they agreed that Hotch would get the baby and Emily would get breakfast but apparently she was choosing to ignore that.

"That was before you broke the rhythm with your phone call and I had to finish dressing Lily plus she is probably getting hungry and last time I check you just don't have the right equipment to help her with that. Right, honey?" Emily ran her finger over the baby's cheek as she rested on Hotch's shoulder getting a soft coo out of her. "See, she agrees." She smiled taking the baby from him. "Now cook!"

With that she left leaving Hotch to shake his head and roll his eyes once again. God how he had missed her!

-CM-CM-

Emily chased after Jack as a knock at the door sounded and the boy ran to answer it. "Jack, wait for me honey." She told him causing him to stop right in front of the door. "Thanks" she ruffled his hair opening the door.

"Aunt Penelope!" Jack jumped up and down as the blonde greeted Emily then turned to him.

"Hello my handsome stranger. How've you been?" she asked placing the bags she brought on the floor.

"I'm good. Guess what?" he said excitedly taking her hand and pulling her through the apartment.

"What?" she asked just as excited as he was. Emily followed behind them shaking her head and laughing. Garcia was great with kids mostly because she was one.

As they rounded the couch and came in front of Hotch laying down with Lily snuggled onto his chest, Jack pointed. "Lily came home! And I get to hold her but only if Daddy or Emily are next to me."

Garcia melted at the sight. "Oh my gosh she looks so cute! You too sir but look at those tiny feet. Oh heavens!"

Emily gently took Lily from Hotch and placed her in Garcia's arms. "Lily meet your Aunt Penelope."

"Hello little angel. You are just the cutest thing I have ever seen." Garcia cooed as everyone watched. "Oh Em, JJ said she'll come in a few days. Henry had a cold a few days ago and she doesn't want to bring that here." she explained taking a seat.

"Not a problem. I'm glad you came though." Emily sat next to her watching the blonde fawn over the small infant.

"Jack lets go get some take out and let Emily and Garcia talk." Hotch suggested. Walking over to Emily after Jack ran to get his shoes he asked "Anything in particular?"

"No, whatever is fine. Thanks." She told him with a kiss to the lips.

"Do you want anything Garcia?" he asked putting on his own shoes and grabbing the keys.

"No sir, I'm good." she waved him off keeping her attention solely on the baby.

After the boys left and Lily nodded off Emily put her in her crib and went back to the couch where Garcia sat. "So ya'll have any actual cases?" she asked with a smirk.

"We just finished one but I think they might be heading out again tomorrow. So ah…Rossi told me about the director meeting with Hotch. Is everything okay?" she trailed lightly. Getting into people's personal lives was her job but she didn't want to cross any lines with the brunette.

"Honestly I'm not sure. Hotch thinks he wants to send him back to Afghanistan because his team is still there." Emily took a sip of her water. All day she had been avoiding the issue more for Hotch's sake but some for her. They had just started getting back to where they were and now he might have to leave for an unknown amount of time and it scared her. It wasn't because she had a baby and needed help heck she was going to do it solo from the beginning but it was the distance between the two of them that she feared.

"What are you going to do if he does go back?" Garcia asked looking at her with concern.

"Deal with it I guess. He can't really tell the Director of the FBI he can't go. Besides he was gonna have to go back to work eventually. I can handle Lily on my own." She said vaguely.

Garcia squeezed her hand. "But can you handle being away from him? You guys just sorted everything out. I mean what is it going to do to the both of you? And Hotch is so attached to Lily and…" she trailed off seeing the fear and anxiety run over Emily's face.

"I guess we will just have to wait and see." Emily shrugged schooling her emotions. "Did you see how cute Jack was with Lily?" she changed the subject and with a sad smile from Garcia the blonde did the same.

A/N: Thank you so much for the reviews! What do you think the Director wants? Hmmm…


	24. Chapter 24

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

Chapter Twenty Four: Moving and Leaving

**April 2013 (Present Time)**

When Hotch left for his meeting with the Director Emily calmly kissed him goodbye and told him not to worry. But after the door closed her fake smile and confident attitude faded and all that was left was her fears. She couldn't shake them but in her heart she knew even if he did have to go back to Afghanistan they would be fine.

She sat on edge the rest of the morning. Jack tried cheering her up which helped some but every few minutes her eyes would linger on her phone or on the front door. Eventually Jack got bored so Jessica picked him up for a few hours at the park. Emily didn't want to take Lily out quite yet. But being alone didn't help her nerves one bit but with Lily asleep on her chest Emily closed her eyes.

-CM-CM-

Hotch walked into the apartment quietly so he wouldn't wake Lily but as he came into Emily's bedroom he found both his girls fast asleep with a light snore coming from Emily. He smiled and went to the side of the bed. He stared at her face for a few moments then looked down to Lily. The baby was tightly grasping her mother's shirt in one fist and the other lay across her eyes covering them from any light that might bother her. Not wanting to disturb them he left the room and went to the kitchen for some lunch.

Emily woke from noise in the kitchen. Blinking a few times and gathering her bearings she got up with Lily in her arms and made her way to the nursery and put the infant in her crib. Walking into the kitchen she smiled softly. "Hey"

Hotch turned at the voice "Hey" his smiled. "Sorry if I woke you."

"It's okay. How did your meeting go?" she wrapped her arms around his waist and his went around hers.

"Two to three weeks, I just have to close the investigation and get everything in order." He watched her face and as soon as disappointment crossed it he tightened his grip on her pulling her in closer. "I'm sorry sweetheart. I tried to get out of it but…"

"You can't tell the Director no. I get it. I'm just…" she sighed looking up at him. "I'm just going to miss you. But I'll be fine." She stood on her tippy toes and gave him a soft kiss.

"I'll miss you too. Jack's gonna freak though." He said pulling back and letting his arms drop. "And I need to talk to Jessica to make sure…"

Emily frowned as she interrupted "Why is Jack staying with Jessica?" She knew Jack stayed with his aunt the first time but her and Hotch weren't together then but now they were and she couldn't bear the thought of Jack not being with her and Lily.

"I just didn't know if you would want to tackle Jack and Lily alone for three weeks." He explained. Mentally he slapped his forehead. He should've asked her first but with everything running through his mind he didn't even think about it. Jack is a great kid but he demands a lot and so does Lily.

"No I want him here. Hotch I'm not some idiot. I did live with you and Jack and took care of him without you before." She pulled away from him somewhat pissed that he thought she couldn't handle both kids without him.

"I know you can Em. I wasn't saying that. Lily is still so little and demands a lot and I don't want you to stress yourself out. But if you want to keep Jack too I would love for you to. He would love it too." he grabbed her wrist and pulled her into him. "You're a great mother and I know our kids would be fine."

"That's a little better." She rolled her eyes letting him kiss her cheek. She shivered as he trailed down her jaw line to her ear.

He nipped at her earlobe "I love you." he whispered.

Pulling back to get her lips on his she kissed him hungrily getting a low growl from deep within his throat. "You better." She winked at him and left the room to get the crying baby.

-CM-CM-

While Hotch worked on bringing some of Jack's thing over from his apartment Emily went about cleaning up her office turning it into Jack's room. It was small but it would do the job for the short time. "Jack can you sneak into Lily's room and see if she's awake?" She asked the boy while moving boxes into the entry way for Hotch to take to storage.

"Yup." He raced off. Jack had been great with Lily. He loved playing with the baby which Emily was very pleased about. Kids his age don't exactly like playing with babies that can't do much of anything but Jack liked helping with her. "She's asleep." He said coming back into the room.

"Thanks buddy." Emily smiled. "Would you like a snack? I think we are all done in here and Daddy should be back soon."

"Can I have a cookie?" his trademark Hotchner dimples made an appearance.

"Sure" Emily grabbed the cookies out of the cabinet and gave him two.

"Thanks." He took a big bite. "Why does Daddy have to go for so long again?" he asked sitting on a stool.

Emily sighed. Even though Hotch talked to Jack about leaving he still didn't understand it much. Hotch warned Emily that the past two times he went Jack acted out and was upset for the first few days but she hoped that if she continued on like Hotch wasn't gone and kept him helping with Lily that Jack wouldn't be too upset. "He came back early this time because of Lily so he has to go back to finish." she ruffled his hair.

"Are you and Daddy going to have more babies?" he asked catching Emily off guard.

Emily's smile faltered and her eyes went wide. "Um… I don't know honey."

"Well if you do I think we need a bigger house. I'm not sharing my room. And Lily doesn't want to either." He stared at Emily with a pointed look.

"Okay, I promise you won't have to share a room." She told him trying hard not to laugh. He was just too cute.

"And Lily too?" he asked with a raised eyebrow.

"And Lily too." she agreed with a smile as the front door opened and Hotch came in with a box in his arms.

"Hey" he smiled setting down the box and joining them in the kitchen.

"Hi Dad. Emily said when you have more babies Lily and I don't have to share our rooms." Jack told him getting off the stool and digging through the things his father brought for his room.

Hotch looked on amused as Emily blushed lightly and held her hands over her face. He chuckled and ran his hands over her back. "Honey, we just brought home a baby four days ago. You want another one right now?" he jokingly asked. He had some suspicions as to what was going on but to tease her was always fun.

"Aaron" she whined. "That's not how it was said."

"I know. Plus if we have more kids we are going to have to move. My apartment won't even fit the four of us now." He said. He had thought about bringing buying a house to her attention but with him leaving he pushed it off but looking at it now maybe he should.

"Well I thought about buying a house when I was pregnant but ultimately choose not to because it was just me and the baby." She moved to help Jack with the box.

"Do you think we should? I mean your place is big but with two kids and your complex doesn't really have outside space. That's if you want to live with me."

"We have been living together. Why wouldn't I want to?" she laughed. "But I do think it's something to consider. Maybe when you get back we can start looking but I am warning you I'm picky."

"That's fine as long as we get one together." He smiled.

-CM-CM-

Three days to pack and spend time with his family didn't seem as long as what he needed but as he rounded the corner with his duffle in tow and saw the sad frown on his son's face he realized no time would ever be long enough.

Hotch set his bag down and picked up the boy. "Jack, you be a good for Emily and mind your manners. I'll call before school every other day and Skype every Wednesday." He and Emily had set a time for calls so they both knew that he would always get to talk to Jack.

"Okay, do I have to go to school? I just don't think I can handle you being gone if I'm at school." Jack hid his smile well but Emily didn't. Sly should have been his middle name.

Emily laughed softly a few feet away with Lily in her arms. "Makes a good point." She shrugged as Hotch glared at her.

"I'm sorry buddy but you have to go to school. Even if I'm not here you still have to go." He told his son setting him down and kissing his forehead. "Em, he goes to school. I don't care if he is cute." He told Emily who looked sympathetically at Jack.

Reaching his gaze she smiled "Yes sir." Peeking around the man she smirked at Jack "Sorry buddy." Jack just shrugged and went to the couch.

"Bye, I love you." Hotch kissed her lips then kissed Lily's head. "Bye Lily, don't grow too much."

"Shower before you come home this time. You were gross last time." Emily scrunched up her face teasingly. "Love you too." she kissed him again.

Hotch chuckled and shook his head opening the door. "Don't get into any trouble while I'm gone. And if you need anything…"

"Call the rich man down stairs." She joked pushing him out. "Aaron we are going to be fine. Go!" with one last kiss he was gone.

**A/N:** Thanks for the reviews! Keep them coming!


	25. Chapter 25

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

Chapter Twenty Five: Spit Up

**April 2013 (Present Time)**

Emily awoke slowly from voices. Wiping at her tired eyes she looked over at the baby monitor on the nightstand. "It's okay I didn't mean to wake you up. Go nite-nite Lily." She heard Jack's tiny voice. Then a small whimper then a whaling cry. Jumping out of bed and racing into the nursery Emily stopped as her feet met Jack's comforter and sheets from his bed.

"Jack, what are you doing?" she said calmly picking the fussing baby up from her crib.

Jack's frown turned into sobs. "I-I don't want to s-sleep alone." He buried his face in his pillow held in his arms.

Emily ran her hand through his hair. "Honey, it's okay. Don't cry baby. Hey look at me." She lifted his chin with a finger. "Jack, it's okay. Why don't we go to my big bed so you don't have to sleep on the floor?"

Jack dried his tears and sniffled "Can Lily come too?"

She smiled "Of course. Come on sweetie." she took his hand and managed to get Jack and herself over the pile of blankets and into her room. Jack jumped on and made his spot bringing the blanket over his body so just his head peaked out while Emily tried to settle the sleepy baby.

Minutes later as Lily dozed in the bassinet next to her bed Emily crawled in and snuggled up with Jack. "Why didn't you want to sleep alone?" she asked wiping at his leftover tear marks.

"I miss Daddy." He simply said.

"You know you can always come in here if you get upset. You don't have to sleep on Lily's floor." Her hand ran through his hair as his eyes fell heavy.

"I didn't want to wake you up." he murmured. Hotch had been gone a few days and Emily was thanking God Jack hadn't had many issues but now it seemed he really was.

"Jack I don't mind you waking me up. And you are more than welcome to sleep here if you need." She knew she was spoiling him some but she did want to sleep alone anymore than he did. She would worry about the backlash later. "Goodnight sweetheart." she kissed his forehead as they both fell asleep.

-CM-CM-

"Jack, don't play with your food." Emily warned the boy as he raced his cut up pancake pieces in the syrup on his plate. "If you don't hurry up you won't have long to talk to Daddy." She said looking at the clock again. It was ten minutes until it was call time for Hotch but after a long night of Jack's fitful sleep and then being woke up from Lily's feeding Jack had been dragging all morning.

"I don't wanna go to school." He said resting his head in his hands. "I think I'm sick."

Emily rolled her eyes. For the past two mornings he pulled the same routine. The first time she was concerned but after he made the slight slip up of saying he wanted to play in his game system she knew he was fine and she sent him on his way. Then the next morning he did the same but after taking his temperature and looking for any other sign of sickness she sent him to school again. "Jack, we are not doing this every morning. Your fine, probably tired but otherwise just fine. Now I need you to finish your breakfast and go get dressed before your dad calls." She said softly but eyed him until he finished his pancake and set off to his room. "Thank you!" she called after him then went to get Lily dressed and ready to take Jack to school.

Walking into the nursery Emily quickly removed the blanket mess Jack made the night before and gathered up Lily's clothes for the day and a diaper. Just on time Lily's small cries came from her bedroom.

Happily smiling at her daughter Emily picked her up from the bassinet and kissed her cheek. "Good morning Lily." She wasted a few minutes cradling her beautiful baby. Every time she held her an over whelming joy took over her heart and didn't let go. "Jack, are you done yet?" she asked through the hall.

"Yup." was all she got in return.

Smiling to herself she changed Lily and went to check on Jack. Finding him still in his pajamas she frowned. "I thought you said you were ready."

"I don't want to go. I want daddy." He pouted falling back on his bed.

"I know you do honey but you have to go to school. Daddy told us both that you have to go while he's away." She reminded him grabbing a pair of shorts and a tee shirt with one hand and tossing them at him. The vibrating in her pocket caught her attention and she pulled out her phone. "Here's dad" she handed him the phone.

Happily smiling like nothing in the world was wrong Jack took the phone and answered. "Hi Daddy."

Emily left the room as Jack went about telling his father about his previous day at school. At Lily's insistent cry for breakfast she plopped herself down on the couch and gave in to the tiny baby.

"Here Emily, Daddy wants to talk to you." Jack came around the corner and gave her the phone then took off for his room again.

"Hey handsome." She answered.

"Hey, how are you? Jack said he slept with you last night." his voice washed over her. Only a few days away and she was already missing him like crazy.

"Yeah, he tried sleeping on Lily's floor but woke her up in the process then me so we had a slumber party." She told him looking at the clock; she was still strained for time.

"Is he having a hard time?" the concern evident in his rough voice.

She thought about how to answer that. She hadn't told him about Jack faking sick and she didn't want Hotch to worry but at the same time Hotch was his father. "Kind of. He's been faking being sick in the mornings but other than that last night was the only time he's been upset."

He sighed heavily. "I'm sorry honey. Do you want me to talk with him about it?"

"No." she shook her head even though he wouldn't see it. "He is just acting out. It's fine. I didn't tell you this so you can worry. We are doing really well except for maybe being a bit late for school today. He was up every time Lily needed feeding last night so we're a little sluggish."

"I can let you go. I love you. Give Lily a kiss for me and tell Jack to be good." he said.

"Okay babe. I love you too." she hung up sitting Lily up to burp. "Jack let's go." She yelled for him and a few seconds later she heard his stomps coming down the hardwood floor of the hallway.

-CM-CM-

Walking into the BAU doors felt good, Emily missed her work fiercely. Holding onto the car seat that held Lily she made her way to Morgan and Reid's desks. "Hey guys" she smiled at Morgan whose head shot up upon hearing her voice.

"Hey Princess and Lil' Princess, what are you doing up here?" Morgan happily took the baby from Emily and proceeded to get Lily out of the infant contraption.

"Came to talk to Strauss. I'm back next week." She smiled proudly. The thought of leaving her baby was sad but at the same time she loved her job and couldn't wait to get back at it.

"That's great." Reid said finally coming up for air from the mountains of work on his desk.

"Yep, do you know where Garcia is? I need her to watch Lily for a few minutes." She looked in Garcia's office before coming into the BAU office but she wasn't there.

"In JJ's office I think." Morgan said cooing at the baby oblivious to the look Reid was giving him.

"Are you good with her for a minute?" she waited for his nod then took off for the blonde's office. Knocking on the door and slowly opening it just to peak in she smiled. "Hey"

"Hey" both the blondes greeted with big smiles of their own.

"Where's my angel?" Garcia pouted.

"She's with Morgan. I went to your office first but you weren't there so Morgan kidnapped her first." Emily laughed as Garcia pushed past her and left the office.

"What are you doing here?"JJ asked taking her seat and offering Emily the one across from her.

"Maternity leave is up so I came to talk with Strauss. Do y'all have a case?" she asked eagerly. She would love to sink her teeth into a case.

"Oh no, we are on stand down for a few days. Last one was brutal so Dave got us a few days to calm ourselves." JJ smiled. "So what are you doing with Lily when you come back?"

"Honestly I'm not sure. Hotch told me to check out the bureau daycare downstairs and I guess that's okay because I'm right here but at the same time…"

"You want someone you trust. I get it. I could always ask Maggie if she would like another one to watch. She's been with Henry since he was born." JJ suggested.

Emily smiled in relief. Emily had met Maggie several times over the years and was impressed with how well she does with Henry. "Do you think she'll do it?"

"Yeah, she only has Henry three days a week now because of preschool but I'm sure she would love a full time. I'm not sure if she would do over nights while we have cases though. Will is always home so she doesn't do that for us but it can't hurt to ask." JJ wrote down her sitter's number.

"I was planning on asking Jessica because she keeps Jack but if Maggie will do it then I wouldn't worry about putting too much on Jess. I think she would do it but I don't know. It might be weird." Emily told the blonde. Emily didn't know who else to ask. Hotch had stupidly suggested her parents but she quickly squashed the idea. She loved her parents and they were great with Lily but she couldn't put that much on them.

"True." JJ agreed. "Funny you just came in Garcia and I were talking about the baby shower you have so cleverly avoided." She lifted an eyebrow.

"Oh really. Sorry to disappoint but I really don't need one." Emily shrugged. She didn't have room in her apartment anymore. Jack's stuff had not only taken over the office but also a corner of the living room. Honestly she couldn't wait until Hotch got back so they could start looking at houses.

"Well I still want to give you my gift and I think Garcia was still buying for Lily last night so I think we need a girl's night." The blonde nodded eyeing Emily until the brunette rolled her eyes in defeat.

"Fine, but just us. Maybe on Saturday because I have Jack and I might talk him into staying at Jessica's. He would be so bored with us." She said giving herself a reminder to call Jessica when she got home.

"Sounds good now let's go see that beautiful baby." JJ smiled and left the office with Emily.

Coming down the stair they both paused as they saw Reid holding Lily slightly in front of him with a horrified look on his face as Morgan and Garcia laughed hysterically. "Emily good take it!"Reid squealed rushing towards her.

Emily laughed as Reid's shirt came into view. Lily spit up.

**A/N**: So Hotch is gone and Jack is having trouble :( I absolutely love writing Reid interacting with kids so had to take the opportunity presented. Hope you enjoyed. Thanks for all the reviews and wonderful comments.


	26. Chapter 26

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

Chapter Twenty Six: Rebellion and Little Black Boxes

**Late April 2013 (Present Time)**

Jack's small acts of rebellion had slowly grown and now the boy was finally acting out outside of the apartment. Emily never thought of Jack as a trouble maker at school but after the phone call she received from the principal a few minutes after she got home from the grocery store, he was. Cursing to herself as she gathered her things and Lily's she raced out of her apartment and down to the school.

"Hello, may I help you?" the older woman behind the front desk asked.

"Yes, I'm Emily Prentiss. I'm here about Jack Hotchner." Emily told the woman signing in where the woman pointed.

"Let me go get Principal Thompson." She smiled sympathetically and went into another office.

Emily set Lily's car seat carrier down and smiled at the baby's blue eyes staring up at her. "You ever get called to the principal's office I will take away everything you have." The baby cocked her head slightly and cooed at her.

"They are ready for you now." The secretary came back and showed Emily to a small office holding a dark haired man and Jack. Emily looked at Jack and from his face she knew whatever he did he was just as upset as everyone else.

"Ms. Prentiss, it's nice to meet you. I'm sorry I had to call you down here. Jack would you like to tell her why we are here?" the man she presumed was the Principal said shaking her hand.

Jack nodded and finally looked up at her. "I got in a fight."

Emily sighed sitting Lily's seat down and taking the spot next to Jack. "Jack, what happened?" the boy she knew wouldn't get into a fight for nothing so she suspected a reason for it.

Chewing at his bottom lip his eyes pleaded with her but she didn't give in. "Sam said some mean things to Lucy so I pushed him. Daddy said we're not allowed to be mean to girls."

Emily bit her lip to hide the smile tugging at her lips. "Jack you're not supposed to be mean to anyone that means not pushing Sam. You should have told your teacher instead. That's what adults are for. Your teacher can help when someone is not being nice."

"I'm sorry." Jack said lowering his gaze to the floor.

"Because Jack did the pushing, no matter the reasons, he is suspended for the rest of the day." Principal Thompson said.

Emily nodded and took Jack's hand. "Has he apologized to Sam yet?"

"No he was sent directly to me but if you go to his class to get his backpack you are more than welcome to ask Ms. Grey to see Sam. Jack, let's not have any more meetings sir." The man told the boy.

"Yes sir." Jack stood with Emily and they walked in silence to his classroom.

-Cm-CM-

"He what?" Hotch said on the computer screen. It was Wednesday so he Skype in for a talk.

"He pushed a kid. Honestly it wasn't a big deal plus the brat was being mean to a girl. Jack was being a gentleman." Emily said folding the laundry.

"Emily, please tell me you didn't encourage him afterwards?" he pleaded with her.

Turning to the screen she smiled. "No I didn't. He was in trouble for the rest of the day but inside I was kind of proud. Not many boys his age would stick up for a girl. They still have coodies."

"I know but I don't want him to think he can get away with physical violence."

"Calm down Aaron your son his not going to be a serial killer. He just defended a little girl. Besides I want him to protect Lily if some snotty kid was being mean to her." she told him.

"Can we just not talk about this now?" at her slight nod he continued. "Are you ready for Monday?"

She smiled thinking about the day she goes back to work. Most of her was ready. She hated being at home constantly and needed some adult interaction but on the other hand she was terrified of leaving Lily. Maggie had happily agreed to watch Lily at Emily's apartment and Henry would come there on the days he doesn't go to preschool. Emily liked the idea of Lily safe at her own home.

"I think so. I'm sure I'll be a wreck when Maggie gets here but I'm so ready for work." She folded the last towel and placed them in the basket on the floor. Turning to the screen again she took in his face. His eyes were sunken in slightly and he looked thinner in his face but all in all he looked good. Really good, she smiled. "I miss you."

His face softened with her confession. "I miss you too." he looked around discreetly. "And I'm all alone." His eyebrows wiggled suggestively.

"I'm not" she said picking up the laptop and holding it over the sleeping baby in the bassinet. "Sorry handsome."

With a defeated shrug he smiled. "Had to give it a try. How is she doing?"

"Really good but I think we are having issues bottle feeding. I've tried but she is not having it. What do I do if she doesn't eat for Maggie?" she asked. The concern was overwhelming for her to think about.

"I don't know but I'm sure she'll get it. I wish I could be the first besides you to feed her though. Kind of sucks being here." he pouted.

Nodding in agreement Emily touched the screen. "I know babe but as soon as you get back you can have all the late night feedings until your heart is content. But now it's about time to get Jack to bed." She told him sadly. She hated hanging up with him but it was already past Jack's bed time.

"Okay, I love you sweetheart. Give the kids a kiss and don't worry too much about Lily. Everything will be fine." He kissed his fingertips and touched the screen as she did the same.

"I love you too." she said then the screen went dark. She sat for a few minutes just taking in the silence before she fought with Jack to go to bed.

-CM-CM-

Emily was surprisingly excited for the girl's night JJ and Garcia had planned. Jack on the other hand wasn't too excited to spend the night with his aunt but after bribery and a few promises he left with Jessica. Emily raced around like a goon trying to clean up for her guests but decided it was no use. As long as most of the mess was secluded to her room and the nursery all was good.

"Knock knock. Anyone home?" Garcia's voice rang out in the apartment.

Emily quickly threw the last of the dishes in the dishwasher and went to the entry way. "Hey" she greeted her friends with a hug. She missed see them every day. Now she was luck to talk on the phone to an adult let alone one of her best friends.

"Where's Lily?" Garcia asked moving right past her.

Emily frowned. "Nice to see you too." she muttered following the blonde into the living room. Lily was laying on her back on a play mat with her tiny arms reaching for the toys that hung from it. A little over a month old Lily was doing very well. She was a little behind other babies her age in things like lifting her head when she's on her tummy but everyday she is getting better. Emily read up on all the milestones babies pass at each month and Lily was traveling right along with them.

"Oh my goodness. You are so cute!" Garcia got down on the ground next to the baby. "She is getting big." She said slowing extracting the baby from the mat and into her arms.

"Yep, she's gaining weigh like it's nobody's business. Although she is not taking the bottle very well but hey maybe you can try with her while you're here. I keep trying but she is not happy about it." Emily said taking a seat on the couch.

"I would love to." Garcia smiled wildly.

"Henry hand the same issue but I had Will start feeding him so it got better." JJ said putting down the bags and bags of baby things Garcia insisted on getting.

"Hotch is pretty sad he isn't the first to feed her besides me but I have to get her on the bottle before I go back to work. I can't have Maggie taking her back and forth for feeding." Emily joked.

"You could always put her in Hotch's office. Turn it into their own playroom." The tech said cooing at the baby who just looked scared and looked around for her mommy. "I don't think she's happy Mommy."

"What's wrong baby? Does Aunt Penelope scare you?" Emily teased taking Lily in her arms.

"I do not scare her. She's just sad because Mommy is excited to go to work. Huh baby?" Garcia said playing with the baby's hand.

Emily smiled looking down at Lily; the baby lay contently in her arms. "I'm not excited to leave her. I mean I hate the thought of being away from her but at the same time I need to get some adult time. And I love my job and want to go back."

"I know you do Gumdrop. I was just teasing." The blonde told her. "Okay enough sad talk let's open presents." She happily clapped her hands.

Emily rolled her eyes and looked at the bags on the ground. "JJ, help! What do you do with all the crap she gets for Henry?" she whispered to the blonde.

The blonde chuckled. "I got a bigger house."

Laughing Emily took the first offered bag. "I guess I'll have to move too."

-CM-CM-

Emily crawled into bed completely exhausted. JJ and Garcia had just left after a fun filled girl's night. They did go over the top with baby gifts but Emily just let it go.

As she lay in bed her mind worked over Jack though. She was honestly getting worried about him. It had been a few days since the incident at school but he was still acting out. Mostly just whining and complaining but recently he started throwing fits. She thought she was clear of that stage with him but it didn't seem likely now.

Hotch would be ridden with guilt leaving his trouble making son with her but she couldn't do that to him. She did explain the school incident but she didn't elaborate on anything else. She would just have to bunker down and deal with the boy herself.

A vibrating noise rattled her thoughts and she reached to the night stand for her cell. Looking at the ID she quickly answered. "Hello"

"Did I wake you? I'm so sorry Em. I just wanted to leave you a message." Hotch's familiar voice rang out.

"No I was still up. We had girl's night." She told him rolling over and snuggling down in the pillows. "Why were you leaving me a message?"

"I probably won't be able to call for our time in the morning. We had some issues and I have to go meet some officers. I didn't want you to wait for me and not get a call." His voice sounded tired which it always did but this time it worried her.

"Aaron, are you okay? You sound… I don't know, off."

"I'm fine sweetheart. How was girl's night?" he dodged her concerns.

Closing her eyes to picture his face, she smiled. "Lily has so much crap its unreal. I don't know where to put it all." She laughed quietly.

"That's Garcia for you." He laughed too.

Humming softly at his voice she whispered "When are you coming home?" she knew the answer but she still wanted to hear it from him.

"Just a week and a half, Em. I'll be home soon." He promised.

"That seems too far away. Can't you just come home now?" she whined.

"You don't know how much I wish I could and I really hate to end the call but it's almost 9 am here so I have to get going. I love you." He told her.

She could hear all the noise from the others around him behind his voice and knew he had to go but she didn't want to. His voice was calming her and she didn't want to lose that. "Just a few more minutes please."

"Okay" he gave in as she sleepily rambled on about all the things the blonde tech got for Lily.

-CM-CM-

Hotch looked up at the morning sky as he finally hung up just as a light snore came from Emily. He smiled softly and reached into his pocket. Pulling out the little black box he opened it. "I'll be home soon sweetheart." he whispered.

"Agent Hotchner, the plane is ready to board." A young pilot walked up to him in the airplane hangar.

"Thanks" he smiled closing the box and boarding the aircraft that would bring him home.

**A/N**: We are nearing the end of this story only two more chapters. Thank you so much for reading and reviewing. It means a lot and I hope you enjoy the ending.


	27. Chapter 27

A/N: Warning near the end it borders on the 'M' side of things but you can just skip it and move to the next part if you would prefer.

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

Chapter Twenty Seven: Coming Home with a Ring

**Late April 2013 (Present Time)**

When Hotch finally stepped off the plane it was nearing 10pm in D.C. Sunday night. At first he thought he would just get a hotel room so he wouldn't disturb the kids or Emily by going home because of school for Jack and Emily's first day back but as he thought about it more there was no way in hell he could stay away. He had to see them even if they were sleeping.

Quietly unlocking the door and walking in Hotch set his bags down and locked back up. He turned on his heel and made a pit stop in the kitchen. He knew he wouldn't be able to stop himself from holding Lily so he washed up to prevent his airport germs from spreading to her. Shrugging off his button down shirt he grabbed a clean tee shirt from the laundry basket on the couch. He chuckled to himself that as soon as the clothes were folded Emily was done. She didn't care if they made it into the closet or dresser. That use to be his job. The faint scent of her perfume made its way to his nose. She must have worn his shirt he smiled.

Checking down the hallway he signed as all the lights were out. A small part of him wished they were awake. Making his way to the first room he cracked the door. A soft light from Jack's nightlight lit the way to Jack's sleeping form. Hotch bent down next to the boy and gently brushed the sandy blonde hair from his face. Jack stirred lightly but let out a sigh then was back to sleep.

Hotch sat on the floor next to Jack for a few minutes just taking his son in. It had only been close to two weeks but he hadn't really spent time with Jack since he left the first time. With Emily and Lily Jack didn't get the attention he was use to from his father and Hotch hated that. He suspected Jack had been acting out because of it but now that he was back he promised himself to spend more time with his son. Jack never sighed up to have a baby sister and he was pushed into a new house even though he loved Emily it was still hard for him and Hotch understood that. Giving Jack one last kiss to the head Hotch left the room.

Making it to the nursery he snuck in. Lily was lying on her back with a small smile tugging at her lips through her sleep. Thinking quickly he turned the baby monitor off so Emily wouldn't wake yet. For a fact she would when he got in bed but he wanted some time with Lily first.

Carefully taking the small baby in his arms he cuddled her close. He swayed back and forth making sure to keep her asleep. Breathing in the intoxicating baby smell he smiled. His baby was perfect. Everything he thought he didn't want was everything he can't live without now. Her dark hair and pale skin made her look exactly like Emily but her beautiful blue eyes took the cake. She was perfect even if she didn't have his DNA. But maybe that was a good thing, he thought. Then she would only have the stubborn genes from Emily. Maybe the teenage years wouldn't be too bad.

Gently putting her back down, he kissed her forehead and turned the monitor back on. Leaving the room he stared at Emily's bedroom door. Behind that door was the woman who made him whole. He never believed himself empty until he lost her to Doyle and then when he sent her way for her safety. But when she walked back into the BAU his heart sang and he knew. He just knew she was the one that made his world light up. The brunette was everything he ever wanted. And the real kicker was she wanted him too. He really didn't understand that but she did.

Pulling out the black box from his pocket he opened it. His eyes gazed over the ring. With a determined grin he took it out of the box and walked into Emily's room.

Emily's body was curled up in the middle of the bed with a pillow in her arms. Her soft snore that he loved so much came from her and he smiled. Moving to see her face he carefully removed his shoes and pants so he wouldn't wake her just yet.

Her face was softened and her eyes were fluttering from a dream. He sat down and ran his hand over her left hand clutching at the pillow. Taking the ring in his fingers he slid the cool silver onto her ring finger.

Emily's eye fluttered some then she blinked a few times clearing the sleep from her mind. As the bed dipped she looked up with wide eyes. "Aaron" her whole face brightened and a smile graced her lips.

"Hey sweetheart. I'm sorry to wake you." He leaned in and kissed her gently.

"W-what are you doing here?" she asked pulling back from him still completely stunned.

"I came home early." He shrugged like it was no big deal but inside his heart was racing as she hadn't noticed the ring.

"I can see that. Why didn't you tell me?" Emily sat up slightly on the pillows and pulled him into her.

Hotch happily scooted in close and wrapped his arms around her. Pressing his lips to her head he whispered "I wanted to surprise you."

Looking up at him she smiled and kissed him. She leaned in as the kiss became more passionate and his tongue swept through her lips and collided with her's. She moaned at finally getting to taste the man she was missing so much. His arms pulled her forward and she quickly swung her leg over his and straddled him never breaking the kiss.

Pulling away he sucked in much needed air. "I love you." It came out in pants but she heard it.

"I love you too." her eyes locked to his. "Is there something you need to ask me?" she smirked.

Hotch still recovering just shook his head and looked up in confusion. Emily giggled and wiggled her ring finger. "Well I have this amazing ring on but if you didn't give it to me I need to go find out who did and tell them yes because it's beautiful."

As she started to move away teasingly he grasped her hips and pulled her against him. "When did you realize it was there?" he asked nipping at her bottom lip as her panty covered center met his growing arousal.

"I felt it when you pulled me on you." She told him grinding her hips once more and smirking at the groan he let out.

Gazing into her eyes and seeing the love she had for him shining through his heart speed up. "Emily, you are the most amazing woman I have ever met and I want to spend the rest of my life with you. Will you marry me?"

Tears silently rolled down her cheeks. "Yes. Yes I will." She said before taking his lips with hers.

Hotch's hands ran up her back sending sparks through her spine as their kiss heated once more. Flipping her under him he took his time exploring her mouth pulling very moan he could from her. As the kiss broke Emily's eyes looked into his dark brown ones. Chills erupted over her skin from the love and devotion she found in his soul. He smiled softly at her and she returned it before capturing his lips once more.

-CM-CM-

An hour of sleep later Lily woke the two with a whale of a cry. Emily shot up fast and ran her hands over her tired eyes. Hotch was close behind. "What? Oh," he sighed as the baby cries came to him. "Lily. Let me." He kissed Emily's forehead and stumbled out of bed pulling on clothes to get his daughter. Getting her from her crib and bring her into the bedroom he smiled as Emily took the fussy baby from him.

He ran his fingers through Lily's dark hair as she happily ate from her mother. "She's getting so big."

"Yep. Ready to send her to college pops?" Emily replied cheekily.

Hotch rolled his eyes. "I was being serious"

"I know you were." She kissed his cheek. "You honestly didn't miss a whole bunch. She's working on holding her head up better and she's cooing more but that's about it." She told him hoping it would make him feel better about missing time with the infant.

"Can I feed her in the morning?" he asked shyly. Just the thought of someone else feeding his baby besides her mother made his jealous. She was his baby.

Emily laughed. "Of course you can."

"Emily?" a small voice came from the hall. Hotch smiled and happily climbed out of bed.

"Jack" he called when he made it to the hallway.

Jack squinted at him then smiled as recognition in the dark took over. "Daddy!" he yelled running in to his father's open arms. Hotch held him tight laughing happily as Jack held on for dear life.

"Jack, I missed you so much." He told the boy walking back into the bedroom and climbing into bed next to Emily.

"I missed you too. Did you just get here?" the boy sat in his father's lap.

"A few hours ago but I didn't want to wake you up." Hotch hugged him again as Jack rested his tired body against him.

"Can I sleep with you?" Jack asked yawning.

He looked to Emily and saw the happy nod as she finished feeding Lily and put the baby on her shoulder to burp. "Of course."

Minute later Emily placed Lily in the bassinet by the bed and climbed in next to Jack. Hotch took her hand in his as she kissed the boys head and settled in to sleep. "I love you." Hotch whispered.

"I love you too." she told him feeling all the blessings she had flow through her at that one statement.

**A/N**: So this is the last chapter but an epilogue could be up as early as tonight if not tomorrow afternoon. Thank you so much for reading this story and I hope you all enjoyed it.


	28. Chapter 28

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

Chapter Twenty Eight Epilogue: Worth the Wait

**November 2013 (Present Time)**

"I just don't see what the big deal is. It just a few more months." Emily told Hotch sitting across from him at the dinner table. It was their first team dinner at their new house but it turned up being a debate on when they should get married. "I just want her to be walking when we get married. JJ, tell him."

The blonde waved her hand. "I'm not getting into this with either of you." She turned to Will ignoring Emily's eyes on her.

"Why don't you just put her in one of those wagon things and have Jack roll her down the aisle?" Morgan chimed in with his two cents taking a bite of food.

Emily glared at the man. "Yeah and while we do that let's wear jeans and cowboy boots too." the sarcasm oozing off her words made everyone chuckle.

Garcia happily swatted Morgan on the arm. "No this is going to be the best wedding ever so if Mama wants to wait until our angel can walk I say we do." She played with the eight month old sitting in the highchair next to Emily.

Emily looked up at Hotch "Please? It's just a few more months and that gives us time to decide on our honeymoon."

"You still haven't done that?" Garcia eyed Emily. The brunette just shook her head and glared at Hotch.

"What? I just want to have a nice quiet time." He said defending himself.

"He wants a cabin in the woods and I want beaches, sand, water, and sun." Emily told the rest of the group.

"I just want you naked in my bed for a week." Hotch muttered. Reid turned red immediately while JJ and Will turned to talk to Morgan as Dave just smiled like a goon at Hotch and Garcia was utterly speechless.

Emily chuckled. "I think you might have cleared the party." She took the fussing baby from the highchair.

"I-I just never thought I would ever hear anything like that coming from our Unit Chief." Garcia finally got out as everyone else agreed.

"Alright Lily you make the deciding vote. Wedding now or later?" Emily asked the baby whose hands were on either side of her face. The baby giggled as Emily made a face.

"Dada, dada!" she squealed.

Emily frowned. "That's not fair. That all she can say."

"I think the child has spoken." Hotch laughed. "Right, baby? Dada is right." he reached over the table and took the baby.

"Dada, dada!"

"No Lily, mama, mama. Say mama!" Emily told the girl. Lily just grabbed at Hotch's face and smiled her toothless grin. "What about Jack he gets a vote. Jack!" Emily called into the living room where Jack and Henry had a table set up just for them.

The heavy foot falls came around the corner and both boys walked in. "Huh?" Jack said walking over to Emily.

"I have a question for you. Do you want Daddy and I to get married now and you help Lily down the aisle or would you like to wait and have Lily walk down the aisle by herself so you don't have to…"

"Hey you can't do that. It's cheating. You can't make your way better sounding." Hotch complained.

"I can and I will because it is better." She stuck her tongue out at him then turned back to the boy. "Jack what do you want?" she hoped he would actually participate in the wedding talk this time. For the past few months he shied away from it. Emily wasn't sure exactly why but he preferred to stay out of it and when they mentioned the wedding he would walk away or change the subject.

Jack looked at both of them. "I…" he paused. "I don't care."

"Oh come on Jack don't you want Emily and your dad to get married?" Garcia laughed not noticing the look Jack made and Emily shared.

He bolted out of the room immediately and Emily motioned for Hotch to stay. She ran after him as he stopped in the kitchen in a huff. "Jack? What's wrong Honey?" she turned him so they were face to face.

"I don't want to talk about the stupid wedding anymore!" his eyes were slightly glossy from held back tears.

Emily's heart broke at the sight. "Why?"

Jack looked around for a quick exit but sighed not finding one. "I just don't." he said.

"Jack, do you not want us to get married? I thought you were okay about this but if you're not we can talk about it." She took his hands in hers.

"I do but…" he stopped looking to the floor instead of Emily's eyes.

"But what?" she prompted gently.

"But why can't I call you Mom and Lily can call my dad daddy even though he is not her real dad?" he whispered it out but Emily got every word.

When Hotch and Emily told Jack they were getting married he wanted to call Emily mom but she refused. It wasn't that she didn't want that or didn't see Jack as her son, she did. He was her son but he was also Haley's son. "Jack, I thought we talked about this." Jack just stared at the floor. "Here" she motioned to the bar stools by the counter. After they both took a seat she continued. "Jack you are in every way my son. I love you just as much as I love Lily. And I always will no matter if your dad and I get married or not but you are a special kid." She winked at him. "You have another mother who did something so extraordinary for you. Your mom loved you so much that she saved you Jack. I know you don't remember a lot about what happened but she was a hero. Your hero and I don't want to take that from her. I don't want to replace your mom. I never could so that why I don't want you to call me mom. That is her special name."

Tears were free flowing from both of them, Jack looked up "But you're special too. You're my mom too."

Emily smiled "I am but so is Haley. And she was your first mom so that name is for her." she thought for a moment. "But why don't you make a new name for me. It can be a nickname."

Jack nodded slowly "Like what?"

"I don't know. Why don't you think about it and let me know." she hugged him tight.

"And only I can call you it?" he asked pulling back.

"Only you." Emily agreed.

Jack hopped off the stool and raced back into the living room where Henry waited. Hotch passed him walking into check on them. "Hey you okay?" he asked seeing Emily wipe at her tear stained face.

"Yeah, did you hear any of that?" she asked.

"No." he lied, he was standing outside the door.

She smiled at him. "Sure you didn't. What do you think?" she called his bluff.

"I think you are amazing and Jack and I are the luckiest guys in the world to have you." He wrapped his arms around her waist.

"Lucky enough to wait until Lily walks?" she smiled sweetly at him.

"Not a chance." He kissed her.

-CM-CM-

**May 2014 (Present Time)**

The music flowed around them softly but all they heard was the beat of each other's hearts. The people watching faded away and the crowd's conversations went unheard. The dark haired pair swayed together taking in every ounce of love the other put out.

Emily's head rested on Hotch's shoulder and his face was turned into her soft hair. Their hands were clasped together and arms wrapped around the other. "Worth the wait?" Emily's whispered into his ear.

A gently chuckle came from the man. "I would have waited forever for you."

"Forever is a long time." She mused.

"You are worth it." He gazed into her dark eyes. "You are worth everything."

A slightly blush covered her cheeks as the love he had for her shined bright in his eyes. "So are you."

As the song faded their lips met in a soft kiss.

The End

A/N: Thank you so much for all the comments and reviews!


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